


Not Another TimeLine

by Paradoxpixie



Series: Not Another TimeLine [1]
Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: 41st Timeline (The Magicians), Alternate Season/Series 01, Friendship/Love, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mentions Suicide, Not a Recap, Post-Episode: s04e13 No Better To Be Safe Than Sorry, Post-Season/Series 04, Replaces season 5, Save Quentin, Soulmates, Time Travel Fix-It, Time travel redo, queliot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:48:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 60,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23400985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paradoxpixie/pseuds/Paradoxpixie
Summary: “Quentin’s gone.  He died saving me,” Eliot told her.  "A world without Quentin is not a world I want to live in,” Eliot said firmly.  His heart had broken the moment he had heard that Quentin had died while throwing the monster into the Seam in the Mirror World.“You’ve come to see if I can change time for you,” Jane said with certainty in her voice.“Can you?” He asked her.“The watch I’ve used before would reset the entire timeloop, back to the very start, before you all came to Fillory and confronted the beast.  Once there, in the next timeline you would not remember this timeline at all."“There must be a way to send my memories to the next loop,” Eliot said desperately.  “Please, I need to fix this.  I need Q.” he confessed.  It was the first time he had said that aloud since returning to his own body.“Very well, then.  Since you are so sure, I will help you." Jane said.
Relationships: Margo Hanson & Eliot Waugh, Quentin Coldwater & Julia Wicker, Quentin Coldwater/Eliot Waugh
Series: Not Another TimeLine [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1683337
Comments: 75
Kudos: 158





	1. Desperate Times

**Author's Note:**

> So I had this idea banging around in my head. I got some free time and decided to jot it down. Let me know what you think.
> 
> I consider Quentin's death in 4.13 a suicide by self-sacrifice. This story reflects that belief, read with caution.
> 
> Imagine season 5 happens after this if you want. It also works if you want to imagine season 5 never happens. Everything takes place in lieu of or prior to Margo and Eliot going to Fillory after Quentin's memorial.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot doesn't want a world without Quentin. Everyone else might be content to move on, but he will stop at nothing to save Q.

**Not Another TimeLine!**

**Chapter 1: Desperate Times**

Eliot Waugh had finally woken from more than six months of possession by a monster capable of killing gods with very little effort. The monster had possessed his body, had frightened and killed gods, killed innocents with Eliot’s hands, and hurt his friends in multiple ways. But the world he woke up to was so dark and depressing that he wished he could go back to being possessed. He didn’t understand how people could be so hopeful, so cheerful. The world was bleak, gray, dark, never-ending darkness. Didn’t they _understand_ ? Quentin Coldwater was GONE and the world would never recover from his loss. Eliot would never recover from the loss.

Eliot clearly remembers the day Quentin had made the first move- out on their blanket on their one-year anniversary at the mosaic. That night had been one of the best either had ever had up until that night. Slow kisses had given way to passionate kisses, passionate kisses led to passionate sex. An event Eliot was uncertain would ever be repeated at the time. They had not had a perfect time in the Fillory of the past, Eliot is not forgetting the hard times. He’d been so uncertain that Q loved him the same way, he had ended up pushing him into a relationship with Arielle. 

He hadn’t thought that was what he had been doing at the time, but he and Quentin had fought about it years later when a new fight brought up past hurts. When they calmed down Quentin had told him that just because he found a woman attractive did _not_ mean he had wanted a relationship with her. Not that he hadn’t grown to love Arielle, Quentin told him, but he loves Eliot more. Eliot had finally started to believe that Q loved him after that. Until they came back- until fifty years of marriage had been undone in the blink of his eyes. Once they remembered their lives at the mosaic, Quentin had wanted, more or less, to pick up where their mosaic selves had left off. Eliot hadn’t been able to run away fast enough. 

With weeks, or years, or however long it was (did it even matter?) spent trapped inside his own head, he had plenty of time for self-reflection. He hadn’t wanted to screw things up with Quentin, his best friend that could be more than a friend. He had broken Quentin’s heart because he had been protecting his own. Protecting his own heart was fine; breaking Quentin’s heart was inexcusable. But he knew, even at that moment, how his words would hurt Q. It was a direct hit on his self-worth issues. 

It didn’t matter what anyone said, Eliot _knew_ that moment had a great deal to do with why Quentin chose to become the Monster’s new jailer. A decision that resulted in Eliot shooting said monster. An action that had released the monster into the world, however inadvertently. A monster that had tortured Quentin for _six months,_ physically, mentally, and emotionally. Their friends didn’t step up, didn’t tell him to take care of himself, didn’t ask what they could do to help, didn’t notice Quentin was dying slowly under the weight of it all. When it was finally over Quentin was dead. It was the Domino effect, one thing leads to another which leads to yet another. Ergo, Eliot breaking Quentin’s heart equals Quentin dead. Simple.

Worse yet, Eliot had none of his onetime friends to lean on through his grief. He had never talked about the mosaic with anyone, never even told Margo anything about it. As far as she knew she had stopped that timeline from existing altogether. As if it had never happened at all- but it _had_. Eliot had also realized that Quentin hadn’t spoken a word to anyone about it either. They all seemed to think Alice was the grieving widow. He couldn’t even mourn his once-husband in peace as his friends didn’t want to leave him alone. They wanted to “help him” deal with “post-possession trauma”. As if that pain could possibly compare to the loss of Quentin.

So, after more than a month of physical recovery from Margo’s deposession axing and internal tears for his loss, Eliot had decided not to accept this world that did not have Quentin. Quentin would never have settled for a world that didn't include one of his friends without trying to fix it, and Eliot would not settle for one without him without trying to undo it. The only question was, "how to change it?"

He researched necromancy spells and rituals first. However, it took him almost no time to rule that option out. Most would result in something zombie-like that might look like Quentin but would be more akin to a soulless monster wearing his face- no thanks. There was no need to make their friends relive that trauma. That was only if it worked at all. Those spells also required the original body to start with- and Eliot didn’t have one available from Quentin. He searched for days to find a way to make it work without that vital ingredient, but to no avail. 

Finally, Eliot decided more drastic measures were needed. His mind turned to Horomancy- time magic. It was the only remotely reliable method. Go back to before Quentin went to the Mirror World and do something to change events that led to his death. But horomancy was no easy magic, this would require help.

Their group of questers had started off together to fight the Beast- a.k.a. Martin Chatwin- and had apparently gone through forty previous timelines in order to defeat him. If Jane Chatwin could rewrite time that much to stop the beast, what was one more to save Quentin? He would need to recruit Jane.

So Eliot searched the forest in Fillory to find Jane’s little hidey-hole that existed outside of time, or something like that. Quentin had explained the principle to him at one point, but frankly time travel bullshit hurt his head so he had ignored the explanation. All that mattered anyway was that he could find the girl who could help him rewrite time here.

He found the cottage and was welcomed inside by Jane Chatwin, a.k.a. The watcherwoman. The cottage had been hidden behind strong magic wards in the forest. She led him inside and to her little dining area where they now sat across from one another.

“Where is my little volunteer tomato?” Jane asked him.

“Volunteer, um?” Eliot asked, confused. What the heck was she talking about?

“Quentin, my dear.”

“Quentin’s gone. He died saving me,” Eliot told her. Wasn’t that just the worst part. Quentin had died saving Eliot (who had broken his heart) from possession. Eliot didn’t deserve his sacrifice.

“Oh, I’m so sorry. Thirty-nine times I saw him killed by the beast, and still I never get used to hearing that he died. How are you and your friends holding up?” Jane asked. She understood how much Quentin had been the heart of their group and that his death must be hitting their group hard.

“Everyone else seems to be adjusting just fine,” Eliot said with bitterness. No one besides him had offered any thoughts on how to save Quentin. They had their little fireside memorial and then were ready to move on. Eliot wasn’t going to just move on.

When Eliot had first brought up the idea to save Quentin, everyone had shut the discussion down so fast he almost got whiplash. It took him two weeks to convince them he had given up so that they would stop trying to stop him. They seemed to expect Eliot to just give up and move on. How little they know him.

“But not you?” Jane inquired.

“A world without Quentin is not a world I want to live in,” Eliot said firmly. His heart had broken the moment he had heard that Quentin had died while throwing the monster into the Seam in the Mirror World. That pain now reverberates anew every time someone says his name, or anytime he sees peaches or plums.

“You’ve come to see if I can change time for you,” Jane said with certainty in her voice.

“Can you?” He asked her. He tried hard not to hope, not wanting to be crushed if it proved impossible. It was a futile effort- that hope was the only thing holding him up and keeping him going. It was either hold on to a fleeting unlikely hope, and collapse when it proved impossible, or collapse from grief alone right the fuck now.

“The watch I’ve used before has already fulfilled its purpose and it’s not a simple thing to reactivate. Even so, it would reset the entire timeloop, back to the very start, before you all came to Fillory and confronted the beast. Once there, in the next timeline you would not remember this timeline at all.”

“There must be a way to send my memories to the next loop,” Eliot said desperately. “Please, I need to fix this. I need Q.” he confessed. It was the first time he had said that aloud since returning to his own body.

“Forty timelines later and you two are still as close as you were the first time. I remember in that first timeline Quentin was mourning the loss of his best friend. He was so lost that I suspected there was more there than friendship and I was a bit surprised that he came to Fillory at all. But I guess he hoped to either die or be saved by the land he loved so much. And he did come to Fillory, and he died. My first change was to save that friend- save you, and see if he would still come to Fillory. He did, and then he died, so many times.

“True, the rest of your group died often. Some of you died nearly every time like you, while others only half as much like Alice. But Quentin died- every single time, Eliot. The beast killed him in every past timeline. Are you certain you want to risk watching him die again if I reset the timeloop?” Jane asked.

“For the chance to tell him- to tell him… to tell him what I was scared to before, yes, I’ll take that risk. Can you send me back?” Eliot asked hope impossibly rising in him.

“It will take more than just my magic- but it is possible. There are a couple of ways we can do this. A questing creature could theoretically be used to assist with the magic. Their magic is strong enough for that, though I'm not sure it would be compatible. Alternatively, we can use cooperative magic with several powerful magicians. Those are our best options. You do realize this will be like undoing all that you have done over the past three years, all the evils you have defeated, all the personal growth you and your friends have done?”

“I know. I realize this may cost more than most would think it is worth. But I have to try. Even if we all die attempting to defeat the beast- again- at least I can have one more year with him. I would do it for just one day, I really would.” Only Quentin Coldwater could make partier Eliot Waugh such a sap. He didn’t care, as long as he got to be sappy with Q again.

“You must also know that the beast is a powerful magician. As such, he will remember this past timeline- as he has remembered all the ones that came before. I cannot change that, you understand?”

“Fuck. Of course he’ll remember. No matter, we will deal with it. Anyone else I need to be mindful of remembering?”

“Henry Fogg will also retain his memories as he is a master magician and the time loop revolves around Brakebills. You will owe him an apology-”

“What!? No fucking way will I owe that bastard anything! He betrayed us to the Library and wiped our memories. Do you know he convinced Quentin that he didn't need his antidepressant medications? So when shit got too bad, Quentin couldn’t deal cause he was off his meds! Not to mention that he could have told us-”

“Fogg did tell you. We tried that tactic in several timelines. The only one who ever believed him was Quentin, and even that only worked twice. Neither timeline went well for him.”

Eliot winced, he knew Quentin well enough that he could easily picture what he would do if he was the only one who believed the dean when he said a powerful beast was coming to kill him and all his friends. He would have tried to defeat him, alone. Quentin was many things, including a very capable magician, but it had taken six of them to stand a chance against the beast and one had been super-powered by god-juice. Even so, they still lost one of their group no matter how temporarily it ended up being. 

“But if I remember, it might go better this time. I have to try, for Q.”

“It might go better, it might go worse. I do not know. I cannot help you in the next timeline. I am unable to leave this area without destabilizing the timelines altogether. You will be on your own.”

“I’ve been on my own before. Besides, Q will be there, and he’ll help. I have to do this.”

“Very well, then. Since you are so sure, I will help you. I think the cooperative spell would be our best bet. There is no guarantee that a questing creature can or would help with this. There are limits to their power. You will need the help of at least three of your friends or similarly powerful magicians. It will take at least a week to prepare the spellwork and gather the materials for the ritual magic. 

“I suggest you think carefully about what you will tell your friends when you return to 2015. Decide beforehand what changes you will attempt in the past and what things to leave alone. Every change you make will alter all that follows. Change too much too soon and your future knowledge will become completely and utterly useless, understand? That doesn’t mean you can’t make big changes, but do not rely on what happened last time if you do. And remember the beast will not be coming at you the same way as he did before.”

“Right. So while I know the beast will come for us one way or another, he may come a different way than I remember?” Eliot asked.

“Yes. He almost certainly will- as I said he will be aware of his past mistakes that led to his defeat.”

“Okay, right. Well, will he know that I am aware of this timeline?” Eliot asked. If the beast was unaware, he would still have the advantage. But if he knew that Eliot had the memories as well, then it would be significantly harder.

“No, for him it will be like all the other timelines. Once you confront him I cannot know if he will be able to discover the truth or not. Be careful around him, Eliot. He is masterfully intelligent, give him too many clues and he may very well learn of your future knowledge.

“You need to be aware of one more thing before we start. No timelines are erased. This timeline will continue as it is while a new timeline (41) will split off. Eliot 41 will wake up remembering everything you do right up until we perform this ritual, and to him it will feel like he is Eliot 40. However, you Eliot 40 will continue to live in this world, with the beast long gone and Quentin gone, too.”

“Wait, you’re telling me that I’ll still be here- alive, without Q?” Eliot felt his heart breaking all over again. That for one version of himself, it would be as if there was no timeline 41. He would still have to figure out how to live without Quentin. How could life be so unfair? Couldn’t they get a break, just once?

“No normal magic can stop that, Eliot. If we erased the timelines then the memories of previous timelines would not remain stable. Only by keeping the timelines intact could we learn how to change events for the better. So it is your choice, do we prepare for timeline 41 or do you accept things as they already are?”

Eliot thought over what she had said. He had wanted to do this to stop the pain that living without Quentin was for him. It was a depressing thought that this wouldn’t really fix that. He wanted to get that second chance to be with Quentin. Maybe it was selfish, they had over fifty years together and that was more than most people get. More than anything, he couldn’t stand the thought that Quentin had died not knowing for sure that Eliot loved him. 

So while it wouldn’t feel any different to Eliot, and he would not be aware of timeline 41 outside of the fact that it exists, he would do it for Q. Even though he would have to wait to join Quentin in the Underworld to tell his Q he loved him. At least one Quentin and Eliot would have a chance to be happy together.

“Peaches and plums, I’ll live with it for the chance of peaches and plums.”

Jane searched Eliot’s eyes looking to see if his resolve would be strong enough. “He will not know your history. Can you bear to look into his eyes and see no recognition?” she asked gently.

Eliot smiled wryly as he remembered meeting Quentin that first day. Quentin stumbled onto the campus and looked at Eliot like he was a dream. Quentin had come to Eliot after the attack on the first year class, not long after they first met, asking him for help. Q was terrified that he would be kicked out of Brakebills for having done the spell that had allowed the beast into the school wards. Quentin had made his first confession about his depression then, and Eliot had countered with his own traumatic discovery of magic. 

“Time is an illusion. I bond fast.” Eliot repeated what he had told Quentin that day.

She smiled at him in return. “That you boys do. Very well, gather these things and bring them to my cottage in two weeks with at least three of your friends. We will do the ritual to send you back then.” She grabbed a notepad and pen and wrote down a list of ingredients.

Eliot took the paper holding it as the precious artifact it was- this could bring him to Q. There were things he recognized, cinnabar, crystals and psychic talismans, a few things found only in Fillory, like a rare flower and a peachplum seed. There was only one peachplum tree. It came from the very same tree that Eliot and Quentin had planted during the Mosaic timeline. They had magically fused peach core and plum core together and planted the result. It took three tries before it survived and thrived. 

Eliot would gather them all and then some for the chance to see his Q whole again. Eliot didn’t care what it required. If it required going to the ends of the Earth, he would do it. If it required going to distant worlds, he would do it. If it required going to the ends of those distant worlds, he would do it. 

Now all he had to do was convince his friends to help with this operation. They had better agree or Eliot was going to show them why he had been king of Brakebills. 

* * *

QUELIOT

“You want to do WHAT?!” Margo shouted. 

Eliot had gathered his friends (or not his friends, but were members of their save-the-world group) together in Kady’s tricked out penthouse apartment. There he told them he needed their help to reset the timeloop.

“You heard him- he wants to reset the infernal timeloop! Have you gone absolutely mad?” Penny 23 asked. He, better than any of them, understood just how bad the other timelines went. His own timeline had been a clusterfuck that ended up with Quentin 23 as the new beast and everyone but Penny 23 and Marina 23 dead. 

“Why? What good would that do?” asked Alice, the only calm one.

“To save Quentin. To stop Fillory from being so far gone that the gods are killed, to stop magic from being turned off, to stop the monster from ever getting out at all! Just like he would try and do if it had been any of us.” Eliot said passionately.

“But it can’t be so simple. None of us ever remember other timelines than the one we lived through. And from what we know about timeline 23 time won’t stop for us in timeline 40- as far as we will know there will be no timeline 41.”

“That's what Jane says,” Eliot agreed. “For us it will be like nothing happened at all. Even me. My memories will be transported to before Q came to Brakebills but I won’t be aware of it in the here and now. It might feel to Eliot 41 like he lived in timeline 40, but really it will be a different Eliot the minute he wakes up with my memories.”

“So then why are we bothering? What can you possibly hope to gain?” 

“Because he would do this and more if it had been any of us,” Julia spoke up for the first time since Eliot had revealed his plan. “He wouldn’t have accepted that it's over, he wouldn’t just move on. Maybe for us it will look like nothing’s changed, but we will _know_ that there’s another group of us giving it another shot. I don’t know about the rest of you, but that’s enough to give me some hope and peace of mind. 

“Besides I owe Quentin. I know I failed him this last year. I should have noticed- but I didn’t, and he died. So I’ll help, Eliot. Anything you need.” Julia declared.

Eliot smiled at her gratefully. He was hardly surprised that Quentin’s childhood best friends was the first to agree. Julia had been particularly distraught over Quentin’s sacrifice. She knew just like Eliot did that while Quentin had saved his friends in his “heroic sacrifice”, he had also _chosen_ to die. Maybe if they had noticed how bad Quentin was mentally and emotionally before the trip to the Seam, he might not have made that choice or might not have been there to give up at the worst possible moment. Quentin’s death was effectively suicide-by-sacrifice. 

Julia had confided in Eliot privately that she felt guilty that she hadn’t noticed him spiraling until it was too late. If Eliot was honest, he had blamed her a little, too. He blamed all of them for not helping Quentin when he needed it. Eliot was in no position to help until it was too late. Not that he didn’t also blame himself, he did. If he hadn’t been a coward and broken Q’s heart, or if he hadn’t shot the monster, maybe Quentin wouldn’t be gone. That he shared the blame was the only reason he was able to even look at his friends.

“Quentin saved me from being a niffin. I didn’t thank him for it at the time, but I know better than most the lengths he goes to for those he cares about. I wish more than anything that we could bring him back. But is this really all we can do?”

“If you have another plan, I’ll happily entertain it. But I’ve been looking for months. No amount of Resuscitation spells or even necromancy will work. Time magic is extremely limited and it's the only one that can work given how…” Eliot said. Alice knew what he meant- any spell that could bring Quentin back from the dead in any form required a body. A body they didn’t have because Quentin’s body was disintegrated by the mirror world refracting his magic back at him.

“Eliot, be real here. It’s still gonna feel like he’s gone, you still have to find a way to move on-” Margo started.

“Bambi-”

“Seriously, Eliot? You think this is gonna help you cope?” She was worried he’d still try to put himself into an early grave if they did this. She just got him back. If he was hoping even subconsciously that this would bring back Quentin, he’d be even more lost in grief when he realized he still had to live in a world where Q had died on them. 

“I don’t know how much it will help, honestly, I don't. But it has to be better than doing nothing. And for our timeline 41 selves- maybe they can have one round where things don’t go to shit afterwards. You realize that we haven’t had a break since we left Brakebills to face the beast in Fillory? Is it really too much to ask that we try?”

“No it probably isn’t. But I want you to be honest with me, Eliot, why do you really want to do this?” Margo knew that Quentin and Eliot had always been close. She had been a bit jealous at first with how quickly they bonded. The only one closer to Eliot was herself, and she wasn’t sure that was true anymore but she didn't know _why_ . There was something more than friendship there, always had been, but it seemed more _defined_ now. What had happened to her two best friends when she wasn’t looking? And why hadn’t she noticed until now?

Eliot looked around the room. Everyone was eyeing him with curiosity in their expressions. He sighed, trying to decide what to do. The days of the mosaic were flashing through his mind. The two of them had been so happy, there with their family. Q had married Arielle but that didn’t change the relationship between him and Eliot. And a few years after she passed away they had formally gotten married to each other. Teddy had been about 8. He had been so thrilled to see his dad and papa together formally.

On the heels of those precious memories was a far more painful one: when he and Quentin remembered their life at the mosaic and the sheer panic Eliot had that he would fuck them up and lose Quentin completely. Breaking his heart, telling him _“That’s not us. Not when we have a choice,”_ because he was so scared Q would want Alice now that they were back. He couldn’t go through having Q who he had been in love with long before they went to the mosaic and watching him pining for Alice.

What should he do now, he wonders. Tell the whole room, leaving his broken heart exposed to every one of his friends. Pull Margo aside to tell her privately and offend all his other friends. Tell Margo and everyone else to mind their own fucking business- he immediately ruled that one out as unfeasible and not unlikely to kill him. 

“Because I need him, Bambi. He died before I could correct a monumental mistake I made. And I can’t let it rest until I fix that.”

“Eliot, that makes no sense! It's not gonna feel fixed to you. So why are you doing this?” She wasn’t going to let him off with non-answers. 

“Because I turned my back on peaches and plums. I stupidly ran from him and never got the chance to tell him I’m sorry!” Everyone eyed Eliot with confusion. Only Penny23 looked like he had any clue what was going on. Eliot eyed him, wondering what he knew.

“Coldwater never had the best mental wards. The past few months he’s been leaking enough for me to understand what he was going through. I just didn’t realize it was a secret. I figured the rest of you knew and forgot I hadn’t been told cause I came from a different timeline.” Penny shrugged.

“Given what happened… after… after, we didn’t talk about it. I pushed it aside and refused to think about it at all. I just wanted things to be like they were before. I’m sure he tried to do the same.”

”What are you to fuckers talking about?” yelled Margo in frustration.

“The key quest. The time key- we remember the life we lived out to finish the mosaic. Over fifty years to get one key. We somehow remembered it, and Q- He wanted to pick up where we left off-” But Eliot’s words were too jumbled and his voice was too broken from tears he desperately tried to hold back to be understood.

“Do you want me to tell them?” Penny asked, unusually considerate.

“Please.”

“They were together, married and everything, for those fifty years. And when they read the letter they had written to you they remembered that life.” Penny explained.

“Married?” Margo asked.

“To each other?” Kady questioned.

“For fifty years?”

“Yes, we were.”

“Then were you-”

“No. He asked, but I ran.”

“That explains it.” Julia said face alight with sudden understanding.

“What?”

“I knew Q was desperate to save you, Eliot. I just didn't know how or why it went so deep. He loved you, I didn’t understand what kind at the time, but hindsight. You never told him-” Julia cut herself off.

“By the time I decided I’d made a mistake I was possessed. I never got to talk to him except for those few seconds in the park. It wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough.”

“And now you want to create a new timeline where you remember so you can tell him?”

“Yes.”

“It’s crazy!” Margo says again. Eliot was starting to get pissed at her objections. She was supposed to support him because she was his best friend. But she was objecting louder than anyone else. After the crap she pulled this year, he was fed up with her.

As far as he was concerned, Margo had abandoned Quentin. She knew that Eliot and Quentin were almost as close as her and Eliot. But she had left Quentin to be dragged around by the monster wearing Eliot’s face while she ran to hide in Fillory. If it was so hard on her to see the monster wearing his face she had to know it would be equally bad for Quentin to see it. But she had left him to deal with it, hadn’t checked in on him, hadn’t helped. 

“I don’t care! I love him! I owe him. You owe him. Especially you, Margo.” Margo’s eyes went wide at the use of her first name. He never called her Margo, it was always Bambi. Unless she had ticked him off.

“What the hell do you mean?” she said in a dangerous voice. She had given up her crown for him, what the hell was his problem.

“You couldn’t run to Fillory fast enough, could you? You couldn’t stand to see the monster wearing my face, but you left _him_ to deal with that day in and day out for months!”

“You are not blaming me for this. I had a fucking kingdom to run!”

“And you couldn’t check on him? Not once? I thought you cared about him more than that.”

“Fuck you, Eliot. I had crap to deal with and trusted he was handling his shit-”

“No, he wasn’t! He was drowning, Margo. Drowning in front of everyone and no one threw him a life line.”

“He didn’t ask for one-”

“He couldn’t. That’s what depression does to him. Why didn’t you ask?” he was pleading now. He didn’t want to fight with Margo, but this anger had been bubbling inside of him for weeks. He wanted to understand why she hadn't asked Quentin if he was okay. Why she hadn’t helped him cope with the monster possessing Eliot?

“I- I thought- I don’t know! He seemed bad, yes, but not I-won’t-come-back bad.” She said a bit helplessly. 

“Well he was. And so am I, if we don’t do this. I need to do something, Bambi,” Eliot pleaded. His normal persona and performance were long since abandoned. They didn’t matter, Quentin did.

“What about us?”

“Timeline 40 will continue as if there is no timeline 41. We won’t be aware of it at all.”

“Then it won’t be any better than not doing this crazy spell, right?”

“It will! I’ll know it exists. I’ll know that the other Eliot will tell Q. I may have to wait to see our Quentin again, but just knowing that another set of us has another chance…”

The rest of the friends looked at each other, each silently asking if they wanted to try this. Penny 23 probably best understood where he was coming from. Since Penny 23 arrived from another timeline, he knew what comfort just knowing that another timeline went better can bring you. Margo and Julia were cursing themselves for not having noticed that their best friends had fallen in love. But they had always been very close friends and the love had been there all along- they had just failed to notice the shift to something more than friends.

“If I agree to help- Eliot you have to promise me you won’t give up. You will live here in this timeline. You can’t leave me alone again.” Margo said, finally acquiescing.

“I promise, Bambi, that I will try my hardest to live. And l I will not race directly to an early grave. Okay?”

It wasn’t enough, not really. But she knew it was the best she was going to get from him without him lying. He couldn’t promise he would be okay. He couldn’t promise the grief wouldn’t eventually kill him. He could only promise to try. 

“Okay, then. Let’s do this. What do we need?” Eliot smiled at her in gratitude. It wouldn’t fix things between the two of them, but it was a start. He could work with that.

“I’ll help, too” Alice said. “Quentin, he wouldn’t quit trying to save me when I was a niffin. How can I refuse to help now?”

“I already promised to help. Who else is on board with operation timeline 41?” Julia asked. She loved Quentin and knew they had to try, no matter how futile it might seem. 

Kady and Penny also agreed to join in. “Thank you,” Eliot said sincerely, grateful that he had such good friends, no matter how angry he was at them. Grateful that they realized they had failed Quentin once and wanted to make it right in whatever small way they could.

* * *

OPERATION: SAVEQUENTIN VIATIMELINE41

They divided up the work between them. Penny 23 and Margo were on 'fetch the ingredients' duty. Margo promised Penny that any comments against her nerd would be met with Penny getting an up close and personal look at Sorrow 1 & Sorrow 2- the axes she had used to free Eliot from possession. One cut for every comment she promised him. Margo was the only one besides Julia he would listen to cause she could and would actually hurt him.

Alice and Eliot were on timeline duty. They were piecing together what to change and what to leave alone from timeline 40. Kady added her input here and there but mostly left them to it. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to help- she really did like Coldwater. But her expertise was little needed. She did tell Eliot to start the group meditating as soon as he could so they might be able to utilize battle magic. She also gave him the name of a few books they could use to get started.

Julia spent her time collecting the ingredients that didn’t need Penny’s traveling. She also prepared the ingredients that required more than just picking it up. The crystals needed to be soaked in a horomancy potion in order to work right. So Julia brewed the potion and placed the crystals as instructed.

Finally they were ready. They collected all the ingredients for the ritual. Everyone looked at the timeline Eliot and Alice made to make sure they weren’t missing anything. The last thing they needed was Eliot making bigger mistakes and making things worse.

“You’ll want to let us know what's going on before too much time passes. That way we can be better prepared for the beast. You’ll have to find a way to convince us of the truth.” Alice advised.

“How do I do that?”

“The best idea can think of is either revealing secrets we would never tell anyone, ones you could only have gotten from ourselves. Or telling us something that will happen soon in the future. That would be harder given that it was so long ago.”

So Eliot talked with each of his friends, trying to gather some information that would convince their past self. He also pondered what he could do for each of his friends in timeline 41 to repay them. But those thoughts he kept to himself. He would tell them someday, when the pain of Quentin’s loss had either consumed him irreparably, or had faded to a dull ache.

Finally, Eliot was as prepared as he was going to get. The group gathered their things and headed to the forest in Fillory. Accompanying Eliot was Margo, Julia, and Alice. Penny 23 was providing them with transportation, and Kady was tagging along to see if it would work. Josh and Fen wished them luck, but stayed behind so they wouldn’t distract them.

Jane positioned them around the ritual circle she had drawn in the ground. Eliot was in the center, as the subject of the spell. Julia was just askew of true north. Alice was standing on due east. Margo was across from her at due west. And Jane was slightly to the west of South. Why some were on the points and some were not he didn’t understand. Jane said something about it creating a gap or something- but Eliot didn’t care about the particulars. He only cared that it _worked._

Jane next walked them through the finger tuts they needed to perform. The spell mostly contained fairly simple tuts, arranged a bit unusually, and with much repetition. Finally, at midnight the circle glowed bright white, which Jane informed them meant the spell had worked. Eliot vaguely felt a gentle wave of magic wash over him. It was working.

The wave of magic passed and everything was quiet and still once more. “That’s the end,” Jane said.

“No, this is the beginning,” Eliot proclaimed. Their part in this story might be over. But the story was not ending, it was starting over. They may never know how timeline 41 fares. It was all in the hands of Eliot 41 now.

TBC....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed. I will be posting regularly. I just finished chapter 10, and I'm not sure how long this will end up being.  
> What I've hated most about season 5 is all the timetravel magic "but we can't use it to save Quentin". Give me a break. It's against their established characters. That more than anything else has pissed me off, making me happy this is it's final season.  
> Leave me some love.


	2. Here We Go Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Eliot performed a quick date and time spell: Thursday, August 27, 2015, 2:00 PM. He did it. He was back to the day before he met Quentin. Back to the beginning.
> 
> Later today the dean would call him to his office and ask him to escort the potential student to the entrance exam. The name on the card would read “Quentin Coldwater”. His world would then be forever changed, forever brighter. Damn, he was sappy right now. He didn’t care though, as long as he got to see Q again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to tell you writing a detailed-oriented story that has variable amounts of time passing per episode is difficult. So here’s what I’m gonna do. Create my own timeline. I’m starting the Brakebills school year near September 1- but Brakebills is ahead of real-world time, so when it’s 9/1 at Brakebills it’s only 11/1 for muggles. For ease on all our parts that ratio will stay the same. Christmas at Brakebills will be February 25 for the muggles.

**CHAPTER 2: Here we go again**

**Thursday 8/27/2015**

* * *

Eliot woke up later than usual. When he glanced at his clock he saw that he had slept for over 15 hours. _‘What the fuck?,’_ he thought, wondering why he had not woken sooner. It was not like last night had been different from any other. He had been drinking with Margo in the Physical Kids Cottage until late, enjoying a private party of two before the other students arrived and they returned to hosting massive parties. He had always made a point of not sleeping till noon no matter how late he partied. Yet it was nearly 2 pm.

So last night he was drinking with Margo. Wait, What? No, that can’t be right. Wasn’t he just doing a spell with some friends? In a forest… somewhere. He tried to get his fuzzy thoughts in order. Slowly, the fog of sleep lifted and he remembered. The memories had started out vague, like a dream, leaving him uncertain what was dream and what was memory. However, unlike a dream, the longer he was awake the clearer the memories got. In no time at all he remembered- everything. The beast, Fillory, Ember dying, the key quest, the possession, even the mosaic. He remembered Quentin, who he would meet tomorrow, if the spell worked right.

“Holy shit. Did it work?” He frantically searched his surroundings for clues as to the date. He was in his room at Brakebills. His room at the cottage, the one he hadn’t stepped foot in since being trapped inside a mental version for what felt like decades. Those were his clothes hanging neatly in the closet. He spotted the outfit he had tossed and burned after he killed Mike, not being able to bear wearing the clothes he had killed Mike in one more time. 

Finally, Eliot performed a quick date and time spell: Thursday, August 27, 2015, 2:00 PM. He did it. He was back to the day before he met Quentin. Back to the beginning.

Later today the dean would call him to his office and ask him to escort the potential student to the entrance exam. The name on the card would read “Quentin Coldwater”. His world would then be forever changed, forever brighter. Damn, he was sappy right now. He didn’t care though, as long as he got to see Q again.

Eliot was showered and dressed in record time. He casually threw on a pair of grey slacks and a blue shirt with a beige vest. He had not worn any color besides widow blacks since he was unpossessed. Anyone who knew him well would be shocked at how little care and time he applied to his appearance today. He didn’t care. He hardly needed to spend hours on his appearance, he had more important things to do. Things like finding Margo and filling her in. 

Eliot would have chosen to tell Q first, but he wasn’t here yet and Margo would be able to tell immediately that something was off with him if he didn’t share. Besides, he could use facts about Q’s arrival to convince her he wasn’t crazy. He couldn’t use secrets to convince Margo of the truth. He already knew all hers at this point anyway. The only secrets he had of hers were secrets to her present self as well. Like her becoming High King of Fillory- but that wouldn’t be for two years, much too late to be any help in convincing her he had future memories. But telling her about a boy he’s supposedly never met that she will meet tomorrow? That would be proof enough, he hoped.

First things first, he thought. Time to speak to Dean Fogg. Rather than waiting for Henry to summon him, he went to find the Dean in his office right after grabbing brunch- it was after noon before he woke, so it couldn’t exactly be called breakfast. He first went to the office he was accustomed to finding Fogg in on the first floor.

When Eliot opened the door only to find it completely empty it took him a minute to figure out why. He could have smacked himself. Back in Quentin’s first year his class had been attacked a couple weeks into the term by the beast. The dean had charged in and defended his students, in the process he lost his eyes and needed weeks of intensive healing to retain the use of his hands. Without hands a magician could not cast. When he had lost his sight he had moved his office to the first floor room where Eliot now was. Before that attack his office had been on the third floor.

So Eliot headed up to the third floor where the dean’s office would be at this time. It took him a moment to remember which door to knock on, but he found it eventually.

“Come in,” Called the voice from inside.

Eliot entered the room and seated himself in the wooden chair in front of the dean’s desk. Henry Fogg looked much like he always did. His dark skin dressed in a charcoal grey suit, red tie, and white shirt. In his hand was a glass of bourbon. Like most magicians Fogg chose to drink to combat his problems.

“Mr. Waugh, what brings you here so early?” dean Henry Fogg said, taking a sip from his bourbon. 

“The start of timeline 41,” Eliot replied, getting straight to the point. 

The dean took a few minutes to think and compose a response. “This is new, I didn’t expect company on this ride. I thought I’d finally gotten free of the damned timeloop when Eliza died last time. Just my luck to have to relive _another_ fucking timeline.”

“This time you have help. I’ll handle telling the group. You just have to allow us to start a battle magic club as well as make sure Julia passes her exam this time. We are not leaving her to the mercies of the Hedges and Reynard-the-fox this time.”

“That sounds like you planned- fuck! You did, didn’t you? You _CHOSE_ to reset this infernal timeloop?! Dammit! We were _free_. Why the fuck did you do that?”

“For Quentin. He deserved better than timeline 40. He deserved better than the life he chose to end. I’m doing this for him.”

“He sacrificed himself to save us from another self-righteous asshole with a god-complex. He made sure Everett didn’t become a god and the monster was gone for good.”

“All that may be true, but don’t deny that it was also a choice to die. Don’t you fucking tell me that it wasn’t suicide- because it was!”

“Maybe it was. I don’t know, I hadn’t seen Quentin in months, prior to his passing. That still did not necessitate a reset of the entire loop!”

“It did. Nothing else would work. Not with how he died. I couldn’t leave it like that. He deserved better.”

“You two together again, in timeline 40? Figures. You two have been together more consistently than any other pairing in your group. You have been more than friends in more than 30 of those past timelines, and best friends bordering on more every other time. How did you remember?”

“The Merken Ziet Ritual.”

“Of course. Alice found it, I assume?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Eliot said, shutting down the unnecessary line of questioning.

“No, I suppose not. Very well, I will do what I can from my end. You may start practicing battle magic but only your group. No additional students- not a single one- so make the club description as boring as hell. My advice is to practice meditating first.”

“Right, Kady mentioned that when we went to her for help last time, and again before we did the spell.”

“Good. It is the best way to be able to cast battle magics reliably. I can also make sure that Ms. Wicker is not denied admittance to Brakebills. But after that you are on your own.”

“Not so fast. One more thing. If you even hint to Quentin that his psychiatric meds are anything less than the necessity they are- like you did last time- I will be sure you don’t need to concern yourself with the rest of timeline 41. Do I make myself clear?” Eliot said fiercely.

Henry Fogg was partly annoyed and partly amused with the threat from his student. If it had been any other student, or for any other reason, he would have objected by starting with something along the lines of, “You little shit…”. But it was Eliot Waugh worrying over Quentin Coldwater. 

Quentin might have been an average student but he was far from an average person. He made people love him with no effort on his part. Even he had not been immune to the young man’s charm. Until timeline 10, when he started to distance himself from these students given that they always died, he had been just as taken by Quentin as everyone else.

“While I might disagree with your reasoning and with your methods, Mr. Waugh, I cannot fault your intent. I will recommend he see Professor Abby, she has a degree in psychiatry as well as healing from Brakebills. She consults with the healing department on Mondays and Fridays. She will be able to help him in such a way as to not affect his magical skills. Whether he stays on pharmaceuticals or goes on potions will be up to the two of them. 

“I will say nothing else, one way or the other, unless I see evidence of decreasing skill from him, agreed?” 

After all, Henry hadn’t suggested Quentin didn’t need his medications for no reason. He had originally suggested it to Quentin 9 hoping it would improve his magical performance. Quentin 8 had revealed that he was on such medications and he thought it might be impairing Quentin’s ability to wield magic. It had improved, in that timeline and several others (not all, true, but many). So Henry has made it a habit to suggest it every time.

“You’re telling me you suggested he go off his meds to improve his magic?!” Eliot didn't know whether he was more pissed at that or less. He had known only that Quentin had stopped taking his meds because of dean Fogg’s suggestion. 

On the one hand, his student performance was a valid concern and acceptable reason for the dean to suggest such a course of action. But on the other hand, Quentin’s mental health and life were _far_ more important than his magical abilities.

“Why else would I bring up such a personal matter with a student? I am not heartless nor am I ignorant of mental illness, Mr. Waugh.” Fogg sounded a bit offended at the insinuation.

“If you do see evidence of decreasing magical aptitude, you bring it up to me first. I’ll tell him. I don’t want you coercing,” 

“No, I will bring it up to his healer that his performance is slipping and leave it to them to decide on a course of action. I won’t allow you to make decisions for another student no matter who he is to you.”

“Fine. Neither of us should be making that call anyway,” he agreed. “I recommend you have whoever tests Quentin for his discipline to check for _mending_. Alice told me that Mayakovsky helped Quentin discover that his discipline was minor mendings.”

“Really? It’s ironic how it took forty lifetimes to learn such an important fact.” 

Eliot ignored his remark. He didn’t find it ironic at all. He found it depressing, and it just reminded him that no previous Quentin had discovered his discipline because the beast always killed him before he got the chance to explore magic like that. So he changed the topic.

“Sir, do you remember the attack on the first year metamagic class? I mean when it occurred? I know it was during the first semester, but I couldn’t remember when.”

“Yes, Alice and company performed the forbidden spell on the Autumn Equinox. September 21st at midnight. The beast arrived twelve hours later at noon.”

“Do you think he’ll come again?” Eliot wasn’t sure how much the beast changed his action from one timeline to the next.

“Most likely. He could never pass up the chance to eliminate Quentin early. It left him more time to enjoy his victory before the loop would be reset.”

“Will you be waiting?”

“Oh, yes, and with a new suit, ready for a fight.”

“I wasn’t sure, given what it cost last time…”

“The lives of my students come first, Mr. Waugh. Even when it’s you troublemakers.” he said not unkindly.

“I’ll be there to help. I won’t let him just attack them again. I’ll be there,” Eliot promised.

“It will be dangerous, but I suppose you know that. You’ll need to practice your magic. Learned skills don’t transfer from one timeline to another without work. You may remember what to do, but your body doesn’t.”

“Right. So, I’ll need to reteach my hands the movements for those spells. Anything else?”

“No, I believe that will be just about all. Do you plan to tell them?” he asked. He didn’t need to specify what he meant.

“Yes. I think our best chance is if all of us know what’s coming.”

“Eliot, that didn’t go well when I tried it,” Fogg said.

“I know. But I will be able to convince them.”

“I'm sure you will. But remember also that this is your fight. I will help with advice, tools, books, anything of that nature. But it is your friends who must face him. It is you he will target.”

“I understand. The card?” Eliot would just have to make sure that he and his friends took the time to prepare and be ready. 

“Here you go, Mr. Waugh. Good luck.”

Finally, Eliot held the card that had brought him and Quentin together originally. Well, originally for Eliot. The card that held his whole world in Brakebills’ fancy font: Quentin Coldwater. 

* * *

QQQQQQQQQQQQQQ

“Eliot, finally, there you are! Where have you been? I was promised some of your amazing cooking, remember? What are you making me?” Margo’s voice greeted him as soon as he reentered the cottage.

“Bambi! My most sincere apologies. You’ll have to forgive my lapse of memory. I was called to Dean Fogg’s office.”

“How positively dreadful. Whatever did he want?” Margo asked with appropriate dramatic flair.

“He wants me to ensure that one of the potentials makes it to the exam on time tomorrow.”

“My god, Eliot, can’t the baby potential find his own way? Or can’t one of the other students do it?”

“Not this time, Bambi. I tried to get out of it, but you know Fogg. When he wants you to do something you don’t have much choice.” It was true that in timeline 40 he had tried to pass the assignment off to anybody else. At the time he had been so reluctant to welcome the first year unless he could also seduce them and the ones needing an escort were unlikely to respond well to his sexual advances. 

Now, he was infinitely grateful that Fogg had assigned him to guide Quentin in. He wondered if he had done that in timeline 1 and had kept it up or if he had added that in a later timeline and why. Not that it mattered, just curiosity. 

“Well, I suppose you’ll at least have the chance to welcome them in style, if they do happen to make it.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I predict he’ll not only pass the entrance exam but will fit in nicely here.”

“Here at Brakebills?” Margo questioned with a raised eyebrow. Something was off with her Eliot. She couldn’t place it, but he seemed different.

Eliot shrugged noncommittally. He actually meant here at the physical kid cottage but he wasn’t ready to tell her yet. He pulled her along after him into the cottage kitchen. “Come on, Margo, if I promised you a meal I’m certainly not going to let a little memory lapse deny you.”

Margo watched Eliot in the kitchen, moving with his usual grace, or almost. No, his grace was fine, she decided, but he wasn’t being as flamboyant or grandiose as usual. He had spent years perfecting his chosen image and even around her he never dropped it, but it looked off today. So she watched him closely trying to place what the differences were between the Eliot she partied with last night and the one cooking her dinner now hoping that could tell her what was wrong with her best friend.

As she watched Eliot work, she cataloged the changes she noticed. His eyes looked more tired, and yet paradoxically more hopeful than she’d ever seen before. A stranger wouldn’t be able to see it, it was hidden so well, but Margo was far from a stranger. He moved more… efficiently and with less flare than he usually did. She also noted he seemed to favor his right side, but as far as she could tell he was uninjured. It was almost like he _expected_ to be injured.

As they sat down to eat, she continued her efforts to try and find out more. She thought maybe it was some memory lapse, given what he had said earlier. When she asked about recent events or conversations he took longer than normal for him to respond, like he had to think about it. But he knew what she was talking about, so it was Eliot, not some body-switching spell or something like that. 

When the elegant meal finished and the tuts for a cleaning spell performed, Margo was ready to begin questioning him in earnest. He interrupted before she could start. “We need to talk privately, Bambi. Follow me.” 

So he _was_ hiding something from her. She was a bit offended, they never hid things from each other ever since their secrets trials when they were coerced into sharing deep secrets with one another. She was only somewhat mollified by the fact that Eliot knew she knew he was hiding something from her and he was ready to talk to her.

They took their drinks with them and went up to Eliot’s room and he locked it- magically- behind them. No one would be able to get in uninvited, and even if they could there would be enough warning to change the topic before they could bypass Eliot’s wards. It must be some secret he had to tell her.

Eliot’s room was elegant and classy, just the way he liked it. The walls were a deep purple. A queen size bed rested along the right side of the room as you entered. The bed was adorned with cream sheets and a golden yellow blanket. Across from his bed was a dresser with a vanity mirror and his styling products neatly arranged. On the adjacent wall was a desk and chair, reportedly for studying- not that Eliot had ever tested such a claim. On the wall opposite the door to the hallway was the door to his full-size closet. Well, he had added expansion magic to make it what he called full size, others had called it over-sized. The door next to the bed led to his en-suite bathroom which had also been magically embellished. Would you believe it had only had a shower when he first arrived? Now it included a full Jacuzzi tub for him to relax in.

Eliot made himself comfortable. He sat on his bed with his legs stretched out and his back resting on the headboard. Margo took her seat next to him and he draped the arm that wasn’t busy holding his wine glass around her. Meanwhile, she snuggled into his chest, in their usual positions. 

As they had turned to sit down, Margo lifted her eyebrow at his elaborate and overly cautious actions in locking the room. No one was here to overhear, first of all, the older students didn’t return till tomorrow morning. Few lived on campus full time like her and Eliot did. Secondly, no one would dare violate either Eliot’s or Margo spaces- their punishment for such offenses was known to be vicious.

“Was all that really necessary? No one would dare try and enter without an invitation, Eliot.”

“Just being safe, Bambi. We don’t need anyone eavesdropping on our conversation. This is not for others’ delicate ears and open mouths,” he told her.

She left it at that and decided to start with something easy, Fogg’s little firstie. “So you have high hopes for the first year Fogg wants you to babysit? You hoping to seduce him?” It was quite unlike Eliot to try to connect with someone who might not be around for long. He, like Margo, protected his heart against such pain.

Eliot’s face practically- no, it did- light up. What the fuck was going on? “Oh, Bambi, just you wait and see. You’ll love him, I know it. He’ll be a physical kid, naturally, and as loveable as a puppy. Just wait.” 

“So you are hoping to get him in your bed.”

“I plan to have him in far more than my bed, Margo. He’s so much more important than that.”

Eliot couldn’t hide his anticipation and since he was about to tell Margo about timeline 40 there was very little point. Tomorrow he will see Quentin for the first time in over a year outside of his own mind. He would get a fresh start with the man he had once married. ‘ _Just a little longer’_ , he told himself.

“El, what the hell? Are you going psychic on me? You’re talking a bit crazy right now!”

“No, I’m not psychic, they can’t predict the future anyway. Margo, my best bitch, my platonic soulmate, I need to know you’re going to trust me no matter how insane my story is, okay? I have to tell you, and you’re gonna think I’m loony or high, or whatever, but I’m not. And I’m deadly serious, understand?”

“Eliot, you know I got your back. You can tell me,” Margo assured him.

“That was never in doubt, Bambi. But I need you to _believe_ me. Or at least suspend your disbelief until I can provide you with sufficient proof.”

Margo searched Eliot’s eyes. She had never seen him look so serious. Not even during their secrets trials when he had to bear his secrets big and small to her to stay in Brakebills. Then he seemed to be slightly frightened under a careless facade. Now he looked more determined than she had never seen before in anyone. Ever.

“Okay, El, you have my undivided attention. I can’t promise to believe it if I don’t know what it is, but I’ll listen with an open mind.”

Eliot took a deep breath. The only person he needed to believe him more than Margo was Quentin, and he had little doubt that his super nerd would believe him. The two men had always had a deep connection from day one. Eliot couldn’t explain what it was, he wouldn't say it was love at first sight, but he knew it was more than sexual attraction. 

If attraction was all it had been, then Eliot never would have told Quentin about Logan Kinear so soon. But Q had just seemed so vulnerable and lost at that moment he just wanted to help however he could. Even if the only thing he could offer was that he got it, he understood, and so he offered Quentin the knowledge that he wasn’t the only one in pain. Quentin had confided in him during their years at the mosaic that he had never felt so understood, so accepted, by anyone before that moment.

“Bambi- Margo- I’ve got memories from a future I technically never lived,” Eliot stated, bracing himself for her reaction.

“What?” Whatever she had been expecting him to say, that was nowhere on the list.

“I had some friends do a ritual to send my memories back before everything went to shit. Shit hits tomorrow when the first years start to settle in. Things were so good, and then they went so very shitty. After 3 years of fight after fight, he- he couldn’t take anymore pain. He chose to sacrifice himself for all of us rather than live to fight the same battle another day. I woke up and he was just gone! I was drowning without him, Bambi, I really was. And because he would have done it for us, we decided to reset the time loop, only this time with me remembering.” 

Eliot knew this had to be making very little sense to Margo. In his rush to explain himself he was spilling out words faster than his mouth or brain could properly process. Words were spilling out on top of each other and coming out in a nonsensical order. No offense intended, but he almost sounded like Quentin. Whom he loved, yes, but he didn’t need to copy his mannerisms!

As expected, Margo stared at him blankly for a minute. _‘Did Eliot think that any of that made any sense?_ ’ she wondered. “Okay, El, that might have made sense to you, but I’m completely lost. Less general and vague hints and more events and specifics, please.”

Eliot proceeded to tell her their story, the story of timeline 40. He told of their friends, how he and Margo-that-was had bonded with this depressed super nerd who loved a fantasy land called Fillory.

“I love those books,” Margo interrupted. 

“I know, you told me.” 

Eliot told her about the other first years Alice Quinn and Kady and Penny. Told her about Julia and Fen and Josh. Told her of the Beast and Plover the Pervert and Jane Chatwin and her fucking timeloop. Told her what dicks Ember and Umber were and how their group of questers had killed the gods of Fillory. How the old gods got mad and turned off magic, Quentin finding the key quest, the monster that possessed him and Quentin’s mission in the mirror world. He even told her of the mosaic, in the most barest of terms. How Quentin and Eliot had lived together (like _together_ together?- Yes) for fifty years. 

The tale Eliot told was very bare bones. He described major plot points and not much else. He left out the messy relationships, drunk threesomes, and his arranged marriage. He wasn’t ready to mention the Faeries, or Fray, the elections in Fillory, or the betrayals of close friends. Those were his memories to bear and wouldn't help the situation in the long run anyway. Someday he may tell someone about them- probably Quentin- but not now. For now they had to focus on stopping the beast, again. Preferably without anyone dying or going Niffin or creating more problems, for once. 

“Holy shit, Eliot. Are you kidding me right now?” she sat up from her laid back position so she could look him in the eye. He turned toward her, shifting to face her fully.

“I kid you not. We’re magicians and we used a ritual to send the memories of Eliot from the fortieth timeline to a new timeline. The minute I woke up with Eliot 40’s memories this morning this became timeline 41. All in the hopes that we can do better this time.”

“So let me make sure I’ve got this. This is now timeline...uh...timeline what?”

“Forty-one.”

“And you sent the memories of your previous self- timeline 40- to this you to change the way events played out?”

“Essentially. Things went really bad, recently in that timeline. So we decided to try one more time. The easiest way was just resetting the old timeloop. We hoped to stop the Beast with less fucking-up this time.”

“Well, why the fuck was it our responsibility to face that beast at all? A bunch of graduate school kids are not the best at saving the world, surely? Why the fuck don’t we leave it to the experts or master magicians?”

“You’re asking me? Besides, what experts, exactly, would you ask? The beast came to kill us, we fought to survive. We found ourselves in new messes and did our best to survive those as well. Hell, when I found out I was “high king” I was such a mess and trying to dig myself into an early grave that I mostly hoped the Fillorians would end up executing me.”

“El, what the fuck?” What had happened that he was _hoping_ for death?

“Sorry, Bambi. But a messy end to a fake relationship- and by messy I mean murder- does that to a guy.”

“And just where the hell was I?” Was it possible to be mad at yourself for something you had not done yet, or was that something you had not failed to do yet? Possible or not, Margo was mad at her previous self, who she wasn’t convinced even existed. How was this her life?

“Not here. And when you came home I wasn’t up for feelsies. I pushed you away, pushed everyone away. But never fear- that won’t be an issue this time.” Eliot assured her.

“Why?”

“Because of the epic ‘beauty of all life’ love of my life?” He hesitantly said, making it sound like a question.

“Did I miss something in your earlier story? Cause I don't recall that.” The “beauty of all life”. What the hell kinda sappy line was that?

“Sorry, Bambi, I know I’m glossing over some events here. Long story short: last time I started sleeping with a guy who it turns out was possessed by the Beast. The possessed guy attacked my friends and I had to kill him to save Dean Fogg. Won’t happen this time cause the only guy I want now is Q.”

This was getting too much for her to process. And he totally did not answer her question about him having a ‘love of his life that was the beauty of all life’. At this point Margo wanted to call bullshit on this whole thing, she really did. But the look on Eliot’s face told her if nothing else he believed every word he said.

“Okay, whatever. Putting that aside, what the hell did you reset the timeloop for?” Margo asked.

Eliot gave her a helpless, vulnerable look. “I didn’t want to live in a world without him, Bambi. He was the heart of our group. But he was so much _more_ to me, and I let him die not knowing that.”

Realization hit her. “Fuck. You really loved him, didn’t you? You love this nerd I haven't even met yet.” She never thought she would see Eliot Waugh fall in love. They didn’t do love- they did not do feelings at all. Yet here he was, clearly having been heartbroken.

“So you want a do-over?”

“It was either that or do something worse, like follow him. And I promised you I wouldn’t do that. I had to do something.”

“But time travel? Wouldn’t it have been better to try some necromancy? Or something to drag his ass back to life if he mattered so much? Don’t tell me we didn’t have enough powerful magicians willing to help with that.” Margo was nothing if not blunt. Why had Eliot chosen to send his memories back to a time before this Quentin would know him?

“I looked into those options first, naturally. None of them would have worked for our situation. I’d have given anything- but I could do this. A fresh start for all of us.”

“And what happens to that timeline your memories came from? Timeline what?”

“Forty.”

“What happens to them? Did they cease to exist, or are they in some alternate universe?”

“No, they are still living their lives. Right now Eliot 40 is enjoying one last all-night party before the firsties arrive. He will meet Quentin tomorrow, not knowing what lies ahead. And in four years after they do the spell that gave me his memories he will still have to find a way to cope with a life without him. 

“But he will have the knowledge that I am here to give us another chance. And that I’ll tell Quentin what he couldn't say before.”

Margo honestly wasn’t sure he wasn’t completely bat-shit crazy. But Eliot needed her, and she sure as hell was going to be there for him. So until she could find some kinda fault in his story of what should happen the next few days she would play along. If he was right, then she would be prepared, dammit. If he was crazy she’d get him help, and heaven help anyone who tried to stop her either way.

“Okay, El. Let’s say you’re right. What do we need to do now? How do we stop this shitshow in its tracks?”

“We start training now. Battle magic, mediation so we can do battle magic, Filorian history lessons for those of us who need them. Whatever it takes. We plan tonight, and start preparing tomorrow.”

“Okay. If all this happens in Fillory as the books are loosely based on real events, it stands to reason that we should start with a refresher course on ‘ _Fillory and Further’._ I don’t have any copies on me, I can go into the city and get some from a bookstore I know. We should all read them to be prepared.”

This Margo sitting here might be before she brought democracy to a medieval land, before she faced the beast that wanted her and all her friends dead, before she became High King, but she still had the determination and no nonsense attitude that got her through all of those events. 

Eliot gave her a smile. “There’s my high king Bambi.” 

“Your damn right,” Margo said. She had no memory of being a ruler or commander or facing things that want to kill you. Up until today her biggest concern had been not flunking out of Brakebills and weather or not she wanted sex with her dance partner. Not exactly great preparations for ruling a country. But she trusted Eliot. On the off chance he was actually crazy tomorrow’s first years would lay the seeds and she’d know for sure before too long. Or they’d convince her he really had future memories.

“So let’s make sure you don’t cock this up. You make a timeline before you cast that memory sharing spell?”

“Yes, me and Alice made a timeline for all four years, though we hope we only need the timeline for the next year. I’ll have to write it up again, memories are non corporeal and therefore, easy to pass through time. Paper, not so much.”

“Good. Get started on that. You don’t want to forget a thing before you make a record. Here,” as she had been talking she had got up from the bed to grab a pad of paper and a pen from his desk and handed them to Eliot. He took them and began rewriting the timeline of events he and Alice had mapped out before.

The two friends put their heads together for how to tell the rest of their group and when. Quentin would be told first, and soon- right after they trained him how to ward his mind from Penny which was priority one. Eliot suggested that Quentin handle telling Julia and Alice, and Penny and Kady would be told some uncertain time after that. 

After that, Eliot and Margo planned the battle magic group and how to bring in the rest of their future friends. They spent hours planning and just hanging out like old times. Eliot had missed the simple days with just him and Margo being themselves. No kingdom to run, no quest, no apocalypse to stop. Just two friends hanging out together. 

Tonight he could have this. Tomorrow, he will have Quentin back in his life. For right now, things were good.

T.B.C. . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merken Ziet => German for Remember Time


	3. Memories and Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quentin arrives at Brakebills

**CHAPTER 3: Memories and Meetings**

Friday 8/28/2015

* * *

That night Eliot’s dreams were filled with memories of Quentin. Not the young version he was set to meet in the morning- but the one he had known and loved for fifty years. His dreams were filled with memories of their life on the Mosaic. Good dreams of love and togetherness. Which was a step above and beyond what he normally dreamed of these days.

For the past month Eliot had mostly had nightmares which almost always involved Quentin dying. Sometimes he saw Quentin die as Penny described it in the Mirror realm, destroyed by his own magic. Sometimes he saw him killed by the bullet Eliot had fired in Blackspire hoping it would kill the monster but had actually let it escape. Most of the time he saw his Q being choked to death by his hands while he watched helplessly- a passenger in his own body. 

He had the memories of all the things the monster had seen, done, and felt while he was possessing Eliot’s body. His last memories of Quentin were of the monster toying with him in Eliot’s body. He hated that. One memory stood above and beyond the rest in its ability to horrify Eliot.

_“You kill Eliot and you can forget about us helping you,” Quentin declared to the monster wearing Eliot’s body._

_“Eliot, Eliot, Eliot,” the monster said while approaching Q like a cat stalking its prey. “Why do you care about him so much?”_

_“Because I do. You kill him and we are done. I swear to god, I am serious. I will abandon you, and I will die trying to burn you to the ground,” Quentin said fiercely. Eliot could feel the monster’s anger, his fear. Quentin was playing with fire._

_The monster got right in Quentin’s face. “That’s cute. But I’m strong, and you're weak.” The monster wrapped Eliot’s hand around Quentin’s neck, squeezing, choking._

_“Break my bones...and strangle me. Too tired to care anymore.” His hands just squeeze harder around Quentin’s neck._

_“You hurt him , you take one more pill, and you can build your body on your own,” says Quentin, voice strained from the pressure on his windpipe. The monster almost killed Quentin at that moment._

_In Eliot’s dreams, he did._

Quentin had stopped the monster from taking so many drugs and drinking so much alcohol that it killed Eliot. He had chosen to play the only leverage he had- the monster’s creepy and strange fondness for Quentin- to protect Eliot. It had nearly killed him for his trouble. 

But thankfully, for once Eliot slept peacefully and had no nightmare memories for dreams. As he showered for the day, he contemplated how he wanted to approach Quentin today. His thoughts drifted as he considered his options in how to greet his favorite nerd.

Talking about feelings wasn’t something that Eliot had ever done much with Margo. Eliot’s relationship with Margo had been based on similar superficial personas and a deep kindred spirit. It was not based on long talks where they dealt with their emotional baggage. One of the reasons they were so close is that they both dealt with emotions the same way, by running as fast as they could in the other direction and denying they had feelings at all.

Eliot couldn’t have that kind of relationship, with the superficial tendencies, with Quentin. Quentin suffered from severe clinical depression and panic attacks. Without his medications in Fillory of the past he relied on talking in order to cope and combat his self-defeatist brain.

Eliot had tried not to talk about their feelings when they first started the quest. He clearly remembers telling Quentin one day early on, “don’t overthink it Q.” It was a technique that worked well for Eliot to deal with his emotions. But not for Quentin. He couldn’t shut down or drown out that part of his brain that told him he was useless and unloved.

After enough years passed by, even Eliot had fallen prey to needing to discuss the feelings between the two of them. Quentin had originally only looked at Arielle fondly. Eliot’s own fear and paranoia that Quentin didn’t want him had driven him to push Quentin and Arielle together. After she had died, the two men had finally been forced to talk about their feelings and came to a mutual understanding.

While Arielle was alive the three of them had something along the lines of a three-way relationship. Quentin was fully involved with both Arielle and Eliot for all of those years. Arielle and Eliot had had a mutual friendship and love for Quentin. They had little interest in sexual interactions with each other and had mostly kept their sexual relations to be exclusively with Q or all three of them together. It was Arielle who had assured and comforted Eliot that he was still part of their family once she became pregnant. 

_FLASHBACK_

_One night in Fillory (he couldn’t say when exactly- only that it was years after Ari had passed) Eliot and Quentin were relaxing under the stars. Eliot lay stretched out on the patch of ground reserved for their quilt right beside the mosaic. Quentin lay on his side, his head on Eliot’s chest and Eliot’s arm holding him close. They began talking about when they began falling in love. It was such a sappy thing to do but that’s what Quentin did, he made Eliot a little bit sappy._

_“Tell me Q, when did you fall in love with me?” Eliot asked._

_A recent fight had brought up Eliot’s old fears that Quentin was more straight than bisexual or homosexual. He had made the mistake of voicing those thoughts aloud. Quentin, offended, had loudly and vehemently protested that Eliot was not the first guy to get him to bat for the home team. It left Eliot wanting to know more, so he was asking deep questions. They had already talked about Quentin’s early crushes and sexual partners. Eliot had no idea that he had been with so many guys before Brakebills._

_“When did I fall in love? God, El, I don’t know. I can see little moments where I started to fall in love with you. And I know when I first really knew that I loved you, but I’m not sure when it began.”_

_“Okay, so tell me those moments that made you fall for my spectacular charms,” Eliot said with a smirk._

_“Well, one of the first has to be, ‘if you were, how would asking me help?’ Remember, when we met and I asked if I was hallucinating?” They both laughed at the memory._

_“But I think the first real moment was when I was so scared I was going to be kicked out of Brakebills and sent to live as a muggle. All my memories of magic- of you- erased. The thought terrified me. But you offered to help._

_“I couldn’t get the death of that professor out of my mind. That spell I had partaken in had called the beast there- I felt so guilty. And you told me about how you discovered magic, how that kid was killed by your telekinesis and said, ‘you are not alone here.’_

_“Everyone always tried to tell me it gets better, or it wasn't that bad to begin with, when my brain broke on me. Like I chose to be depressed and therefore could just choose to be… not. You were the first one who didn’t try and brush off what I was feeling. You just accepted that I felt like crap and told me I wasn’t alone._

_“No one, not even Jules, ever really understood me before that moment, before you. You were just there when I needed you. And after that, when I felt like crap, I looked for you and you were there, and I didn’t feel quite so crappy.”_

_Eliot felt so touched. It had been some unknown instinct and a spur-of-the-moment decision to tell Quentin just a couple of weeks after meeting him that he had discovered magic by killing his childhood bully. He was glad that moment had meant so much to Quentin. That he had been able to help him that day._

_“I’m glad I could help you when you needed it, Q.” Eliot places a kiss on his head. They lay there in silence for a moment, just enjoying their closeness._

_“So when did you know you had fallen in love with me?” Eliot queries._

_“Fallen in love or just crushing?”_

_“Both.”_

_“Oh, I knew I was crushing on you from day one. That’s what you get for looking like a wet dream draped across the school sign like you were. I first realized my love for you was more than friendship when I went back to the clock after magic was turned off and I-I-I couldn’t get b-back to-to Fillory, back to you.”_

_Quentin’s voice was breaking a little at the painful memory and Eliot pulled him closer, holding him tight to his chest. Quentin had gone to help Alice at Brakebills South when she had told him the Old Gods would turn off magic to punish them for killing the god Ember. He had run to the portal to Fillory as fast as he could- but it was closed by the time he arrived. He had felt like his heart had been torn out of his chest at the thought he would never see Eliot again._

_“When did you fall in love with me?“ Quentin asked, desperate to get his mind off the past. Eliot was right here, holding him close._

_“When did I fall in love or when did I know I had fallen in love?“ Eliot returned with a smirk._

_“Either. Or both. Whatever,” Q replied, smiling slightly as well._

_“Well, as Bambi ratted me out on day one- I was attracted to you from the start. I knew there was something deeper there when I told you about Logan. Bambi only found out as soon as she did because she was my partner in the secrets trial._

_“I think I knew I was falling into love when I heard you had been attacked, that second time when Mike-“_

_“Right, yeah. When Penny got between me and the Virgo blade.”_

_“Yes. I was scared shitless that you had been hurt, which was my first clue. That night you came to sit with me after I...I...defended Dean Fogg. I knew there was something undeniably deeper between us after that. And in that moment when you put the crown on my head, I knew I loved you as far more than a friend, but I never thought-“ he cut himself off._

_“You never realized the attraction went both ways. God we are both idiots.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“El, you have to know I’m a bit clueless when it comes to sexual attraction directed at me. I see attraction where there's only friendly affection like with Julia growing up. And I see friendly affection where there’s sexual attraction, like with you, apparently.”_

_“Q, are you telling me you didn’t know I was attracted to you?” Eliot asks incredulously. Hadn’t he been rather obvious in his attraction to and interest in Quentin? Not obvious enough._

_“Bingo. I had no clue. Fuck, I was floored you wanted to be friends with me. More- not possible someone as cute as you wanted_ me _. Another nerd seemed more the attainable one, you know?” Right, so that explained him chasing Alice._

_“But- Bambi told you when I introduced you to her that I called you cute. How did you miss my interest?”_

_“By being a depressed super nerd. I couldn’t believe you would want me. It might have been obvious to you, but when my brain keeps telling me what a loser I am and how someone as gorgeous and extroverted as you would never look twice…whatever actions or words to the contrary you gave me were interpreted in that light, you know?”_

_“God, Q. Clinical depression sure is an ego killer. Never fear, honey, I’ll tell you how cute, smart, sexy, and loved you are every damn day from now on. I’ll drown out your self-flagellation, Q, I promise.” he said, leaning down and kissing him thoroughly._

_The rest of that night involved much fewer words and far more action. Eliot spent hours showing Quentin just how sexually attractive he really was._

_END FLASHBACK_

That settled it. Eliot was going to stick to the original script. Mostly. He would, however, be more obvious in his attraction. He knew if he wanted Quentin to know Eliot was interested he would need to spell it out for him. Eliot also knew he had to move gently or he’d scare him off altogether. 

This was going to be a delicate balancing act. Eliot had to start early or he’d be stuck watching the Quentin/Alice affair, and he couldn’t bear that again. Not after everything they’d been through. He wanted Quentin to choose to be with him. He wanted to love and care for the man as he had in Fillory. To be loved and cared for by him, too.

Despite that desire, Eliot told himself the most important part was just being his friend. He could survive just being the best friend if that was all he got. But he was going to try his hardest to get in before Alice and Quentin went to Brakebills South and that Russian bastard turned them literally into horny foxes. He wasn’t gonna let that ass Mayakovsky mess with them before he let Quentin know he was wanted. 

Eliot dressed as he had in timeline 40- in light almost white slacks, white button down shirt, and light brown vest. He skipped the tie hoping that would help avoid intimidating Q- which probably wouldn’t really help. But ties also felt too tight on his throat, which reminded him of choking. So he hadn’t been able to bear wearing them ever since his return to his body. 

Eliot styled his hair artfully. He dabbed only the lightest amount of cologne and only on his wrist. Quentin was actually allergic to cologne so he only applied the smallest amount. He grabbed his pack of cigarettes. Finally, he was ready to go meet Quentin, again.

* * *

EQEQEQEQEQEQEQ

Eliot waited for Quentin to arrive lying stretched out on the Brakebills sign out front of the main administration building on campus. Quentin was due to arrive inside the wards any minute now. He was anticipating his arrival in anxious excitement, and trying to hide it. 

Eliot wasn’t going to be able to tell Quentin about timeline 40 for about a week maybe two. He and Margo needed some time to set up the battle magic club in such a manner as to not tick off Fogg. He wouldn’t even care about pissing off Fogg except the man ran the school and can make more trouble than he wanted to put up with. More importantly Quentin and the other first years of their group needed time to settle in before being bombarded with tales of magical lands with a murderous beast they had failed to sufficiently defeat forty times thus far. 

Without being able to reveal their previous relationship, Eliot had to build his connection to Quentin from scratch. The problem was that Eliot had known Quentin for over three years, or over fifty years, depending on how you count On top of that, Eliot had been mourning Quentin for almost three months. He _missed_ him deeply. He wanted nothing more than to pull Quentin into his arms and never let him go.

He has been missing his romantic relationship with Quentin since turning him down last year. He had been longing for any part of Quentin he could get since he woke up and Bambi told him that Quentin had died getting rid of the monster and a Librarian with a god-complex. _‘Q, why did you leave me? What’s the point of being alive and free if I still can’t have you? I miss you, honey,’_ Eliot thought.

 _‘Mind back in the moment, Waugh. You have to greet firstie-Quentin.'_ With effort Eliot turned his mind back to the matter at hand. He mentally went over his “greeting Quentin for the first time” list. Be friendly, but don’t snog him on sight. Smile, and don’t cry on him. Welcome him, don’t yell at him for dying. Offer a tour, don’t proposition him.

Then Quentin Coldwater came tumbling out of the bushes that hid the wardline and onto the campus. As soon as Eliot caught a glimpse of him every thought promptly abandoned his head. Quentin was _alive, here, alive._ Eliot had missed him so much. But that was why he had Eliot 40’s memories, to give them another chance to _get it right_. 

Quentin looked just like he remembered. Long dirty brown hair down to his shoulders. It was neater then he knew Quentin normally kept it, but he had just come from an interview so he must have made more of an effort on his appearance this morning. He wore a long chocolate brown wool coat over a green sweater, his brown messenger bag slung over his right shoulder. Wide brown eyes took in his new surroundings in wonder. As Quentin approached Eliot noticed that Q had about a day’s worth of stubble on his face.

Quentin was pretty far back, which was a very good thing. While Quentin took in his surroundings and decided what to do next, Eliot had time to recompose himself. He had to bite back the instinct to run up and hug Quentin for all he was worth. He had to _wait_. He could hug the stuffing out of him, snog him, and tell him not to die when he had a chance to tell Quentin the full story. For now, he had to be Eliot Waugh, guide, friend, and possible potential boyfriend. But it was just so very good just to be able to see him, alive, healthy, hopeful. It was enough.

By the time Quentin had approached the Brakebills sign where Eliot lay he had managed to gather hit wits. He sat up and watched Q remove his winter coat, it was hardly needed in a place that never got below 60 degrees. Brakebills had perpetual summer. Show-time.

“Quentin Coldwater-?” He had almost said Coldwater-Waugh- oops. He wanted to, but not now. He gave Quentin a friendly, welcoming smile. 

Quentin nodded, still speechless from shock of evidence of magic he wasn't positive existed yet. Eliot jumped down and approached Quentin, drinking in the sight of the man he loved. He was probably staring a little intensely for a first meeting but he couldn’t help it. However, he still had to make sure Quentin made it to the entrance exam on time. 

“I’m Eliot. Welcome to Brakebills University. But you’re late so follow me, quickly.” Eliot had gotten close enough that he was able to grab his hand and he pulled Quentin along after him as he headed off to the main academic building where the entrance exams took place.

“Um, di- where am I?” 

Eliot would have liked to say something to calm Quentin down, just a little, but he knew for a fact that Quentin could handle this and he would pass with flying colors. Eliot actually could get in a lot of trouble for spilling the beans before he even got his potential student to the exam. Quentin didn’t need him to protect him right now, just to get him to his exam.

“As I said, Brakebills University, in upstate New York,” Eliot replied, not pausing as they were late enough already.

“Wait. Am I hallucinating?” 

Eliot’s heart leaped at the familiar words. He smiled, knowing that this was one of those moments when Quentin had started to fall in love with him. He turned around to address Quentin. “If you were, how would asking me help?” he asked with a smile. Quentin shrugged in response. Eliot grabbed his hand and continued walking.

“Come on, I'll explain what I can on our way. Brakebills is an elite school- I’d tell you what for but part of your test is to figure that out for yourself. But they have reason to believe you qualify for admittance to the graduate program. I’m taking you to your entrance exam. Pass,” Eliot stopped to look at Quentin.

“Pass, and I promise to give you my very thorough, very _personal_ tour. Of the entire campus. Okay?”

“Umm, sure, yeah. I’m good at tests.”

“Then it’s a date! You, me, and a tour of campus tomorrow! The testing will take all day. The only thing you will want tonight is food and a bed. But definitely a date for tomorrow, ok?” Eliot hoped he put enough romantic interest in his voice to let Q know he really could take it as a date. He didn’t count on that, though. 

“Right, it’s a date.” Quentin replied automatically.

“Quentin, let's get you to your exam on time. Otherwise I might miss my date with your cute self tomorrow,” Eliot said, hoping he had successfully planted the first seed.

* * *

QUELIOTTOILEUQQUELIOT

“So how did things go with the cute nerd?” Margo’s voice greeted him from their couch by the window as he returned to the cottage. He walked over and gracefully sat in his spot. Once he was settled Margo placed her feet into his lap making herself comfortable. 

“Good. God, it was so good to see him _alive_ , Bambi,” Eliot said with much emotion in his voice. Margo didn’t do feelings, but according to Eliot this was his spouse who had died on him. She allowed him some leeway, for the moment.

“So when do I get to meet him?”

“I promised him a tour of campus tomorrow. You want to join me in making sure he and Julia know this campus as well as we do?”

“Well, I suppose I could. Can’t let you do it by yourself, you’ve been out how long?”

“Oh, years, Bambi. I’m sure in my old age I’ve forgotten all the important things excluding our cottage, of course.” 

“Of course. They need to know where to come to have fun, and where to go to avoid the bores that go here. Someone who knows what they’re doing has to show these newbies the ropes.”

“If you want. I might need you to help me get time to talk to Q. Julia will probably be with him.”

“Julia?”

“Q’s best friend, she was at the entrance exam with him,” Eliot told her.

“Right, but who’s to say she’ll even pass?”

“She will. Future memories, remember?”

“Right, but you didn’t mention anyone named Julia being at Brakebills last night.”

“Right, that’s cause someone messed with it so she wasn’t here last time. I have it on good authority it won’t happen this time. She’ll be in and will be one of the best in her year, I’m certain.”

“Right. If you say so,” Margo said, with still a bit of disbelief in her voice.

“Trust me, Bambi. Tomorrow you will meet the cutest mess of anxiety you will ever meet. And soon you’ll meet two smart bitches who might be able to keep up with you. Okay?”

“Alright. Then I guess I’m going to go with you to meet him tomorrow-”

“Remember, Julia will be there when we find Quentin, I’m sure of it.”

“Even though it’s happening differently from what you remember last time?” She asked skeptically.

“Before Brakebills Julia was Quentin’s Bambi,” Eliot replied.

“Oh. Well then, I’ll go with you to meet both of them tomorrow, capiche?”

“Whatever High King Bambi wants.”

The two put aside their talk of future events and friends for the rest of the day. Eliot went to the kitchen to prepare a meal for tomorrow to offer the two once the tour concluded. Margo sat with him, helping if he needed it (almost never), and going over what she knew about the two people Eliot had described from his future memories.

Eliot had given Margo clear physical and personality descriptions so that she could tell that Eliot really had known these people before today. Hopefully, this would convince her that her best friend hadn’t lost his marbles so that they could start their plans to stop the beast.

* * *

QUENTIN MAKEPEACE COLDWATER

Quentin Coldwater was either having an actual psychotic break, or something inexplicably weird was going on. His day just kept getting crazier and crazier. His interview with Yale had been canceled due to the interviewer being dead on arrival. Just what he fucking needed. He and his friend Julia called the cops to report the dead body. 

The paramedic who had responded to his 911 call had given him an envelope with his name on it that had apparently been lying on the interviewer’s desk. When he opened it he saw it contained some pages that claimed to be “ _Fillory and Further: Book 6”_. That was pretty unbelievable by itself but then the wind blew a page of the manuscript right out of his hand. Not knowing if it was genuine or not he chased after it. 

Quentin chased the page down an alley. The wind blew it onto a side yard with trees and he chased into thicker and thicker trees. He finally broke through only to find himself in a strange yet idyllic setting that looked nothing like the dirty alley of New York City he’d been in moments beforehand. Not only that, but where it had been a chilly 40 degrees outside before it was now as warm as a summer day, easily 70 degrees. More bizarre still was that the sun had been setting before but now it was clearly up and only early afternoon. Just where the hell was he? How did he get here? Had he slipped and hit his head? Was he dreaming or hallucinating? 

Quentin was trying to put fantasy worlds behind him, he really was. He thought that maybe if he stopped looking for magical lands with quests and heroes and fairy godmothers where dreams come true he might not think the real world sucks so much. Maybe then he could be happy. Or at the very least not-depressed. But right now he couldn’t help but think (think, wish, hope, pray) that he had been somehow whisked away to Fillory or Narnia or some other magical land. Hell he’d even take Tatooine or Vulcan at this point, except they were barren planets and this setting hardly matched.

He found himself in a wide open field of well manicured green grass. Surrounding the area on all sides were buildings with trees planted sparsely throughout. He followed the path at his feet and up ahead saw a large three-story red brick building. It’s architecture was similar to many governmental and administrative buildings all over the country. Quentin took off his outer coat and hung it from his bag as he approached it, given how warm it was here. In front of the building he saw a stone wall with a sign reading “BRAKEBILLS” on it.

Laying on top of the wall was a tall, slim man who appeared about his age. He was dressed immaculately in light almost white slacks, white dress shirt and a two-tone brown vest. He had dark wavy hair that was long up top but short on the sides, with sideburns but was otherwise clean-shaven. He projected an aura of careless disinterest as he lay with his right leg stretched out in front of him and his left bent at the knee. His left hand was holding the cigarette he was smoking and when he brought it to his mouth Quentin noticed he was wearing rings on the first two fingers of that hand. In his right hand he held a small card. The guy was undeniably hot, and probably knew it too. He could probably have his pick of any girl on campus, or guy, depending on his preference. 

When he turned to look at Quentin the man’s face went from disinterest to something...more. Quentin wasn’t sure what to make of the expression on his face. He almost wanted to call it, but it couldn’t be longing _._ No one longed for Quentin Coldwater. He had to be projecting or something. 

The guy sat up as he approached him, legs down dangling down the side of the sign. He turned to Quentin and smiled at him. It was an open and warm smile. The guy seemed friendly enough. Now if he could just explain where they were, and how he had arrived here, that'd be great.

“Quentin Coldwater?” He asked in a friendly voice. 

Quentin just nodded in response. He tried to say something along the lines of, “Um, Yeah?” but his throat didn’t seem to want to cooperate just yet. How exactly did this guy know his name?

The guy jumped down from his position with the grace of a cat and walked right up to Quentin. He looked Quentin in the eyes, almost starring, quite intensely. Quentin couldn’t help but note how beautiful his deep golden hazel eyes were. Those eyes never left his face though they darted all over it like they were trying to memorize it. Quentin felt connected to him, somehow, but that didn’t make any sense.

“I’m Eliot. Welcome to Brakebills University. But you’re late so follow me, quickly.” Eliot had gotten close enough that he was now able to grab his hand and he pulled Quentin along after him as he headed around the wall. The card now tucked into Eliot’s front vest pocket.

“Um, di- where am I?” He wanted to ask if he was in Fillory, but that seemed too far-fetched, even for this crazy day. So less obviously crazy questions it was. 

“As I said, Brakebills University, in upstate New York,” Eliot replied, not stopping.

“Wait. Am I hallucinating?” 

Eliot turned around to address Q, “If you were, how would asking me help?” he asked with fond teasing in his voice. Quentin recognized the tone from when Julia teased him. Quentin shrugged in response. Eliot had a point, but it seemed a prudent question nonetheless. 

“Come on, I'll explain on our way. Brakebills is an elite school- I’d tell you what for but part of your test is to figure that out for yourself. But they have reason to believe you’d qualify for admittance to the graduate program here. I’m taking you to your entrance exam. Pass,” Eliot stopped to look Quentin in the eyes again.

“Pass, and I promise to give you my very thorough, very _personal_ tour. Of the entire campus. Okay?”

“Umm, sure, yeah. I’m good at tests.”

“Then it’s a date! You, me, and a tour of campus tomorrow! The testing will take the rest of the day. Trust me, the only thing you will want tonight is food and a bed. But definitely a date for tomorrow, ok?” Eliot looked…hopeful. 

“Right, it’s a date.”

“Well, then, Quentin, let's get you to your exam on time. Otherwise I won’t have a date with your cute self tomorrow,” Eliot said with cheerfulness.

Eliot escorted Quentin to a room in the main building. With an encouraging smile and a “good luck”, Eliot pointed him into the room. The room was large with enough room for the approximately one hundred people testing. In the front of the room were a few people administering the exam. On the wall behind them Quentin noticed a crest that said “Brakebills”. Quentin quickly took a seat in the back, next to a man with brown skin and a mean look in his eye. Quentin did his best to ignore the shouted “Late!” from the front of the room.

The test was undeniably weird, but Quentin ignored that and just focused on doing his best. After completing the written portion and dropping it off on the table in the front of the room, he spotted a short woman with long wavy brown hair and wearing a familiar burgundy turtleneck. It was his best friend since childhood, Julia Wicker. She was also turning in her own exam.

“Jules!” Quentin called.

“Oh, my god, Q! I ’m so glad to see you. Any idea what’s going on? Or how you got here?” Julia asked as she pulled him into a hug.

“No, I can’t really explain that.”

“No, me neither. It was so weird. I was on an elevator…then I was here.”

“Oh, thank god. Thank god that you’re confused too. I was worried…I mean I started these new meds today and I thought maybe...”

“Stop talking, please. Stay focused,” came the voice of the dark skinned older man running the exam from the front of the room. The two friends parted ways to continue to the next phase of the entrance exam. They made promises to meet out front on the lawn later tonight if they could, and to call tomorrow otherwise.

* * *

QFREAKOUT

Quentin was both thrilled and terrified to learn that Brakebills was a school for magicians. Magic was _real_ , holy shit. All his dreams come true at once, this never happened! He was torn whether to throw a party in joy or run for the hills as this was absolutely crazy. Yet he had clearly performed some magic, he made a miniature castle Whitspire out of those cards. Magic was real, and he, Quentin Makepeace Coldwater, was a magician! This was without a doubt the best day of his life.

The dean, who’s name was Henry Fogg, told him about how the program works, and what those on the outside are told. The alumni guy he was supposed to have the interview with this morning worked for Brakebills, he was told. Quentin still couldn’t believe it. Just sign on the dotted line and he could be a magician? All his dreams come true at once. Good things didn’t happen to him, he was terrified he was going to wake up and find out he had dreamed it all. 

“Quentin,” dean Fogg said, “Being a magician can be a wonderful thing, but it can also be terrifying. This will not solve all your problems, and being a magician takes a lot of hard work. Do you understand what I’m telling you?”

“Yes. I-I-I mean I think so.”

“Most of our students come to us with more than their fair share of emotional problems that they’ve already learned to try and drink away. Self-medication is a constant here. But pharmaceuticals can have unpredictable results with magic. I want you to make time to go see Healer Abby, and discuss alternative treatment options for your depression with her.”

Quentin froze. He had not said a word about his clinical depression. He hated his depression, that part of himself that tried to sabotage him all the time. How on earth did the dean know about it?!

“How- How-”

“It’s my job to know as much about the incoming students and potentials as I can. Given where you were just days ago, is it any surprise I am aware of it?”

“No, I guess not.”

“You will find more than a few of your fellow students and even professors can relate, Quentin. I am not any kind of healer and I know little about psychiatry, but Abby does. She will be able to help you find a way to cope with your depression and anxiety in this new setting.”

“Am I required to see her?” Quentin asked, not enjoying being forced into seeing any type of psych doctor.

“No, I make no such demands. I simply recommend that you give her a chance. Maybe the regimen you are on works for you, maybe she has a treatment that is better for you. You won’t know if you don’t try.”

“I’ll consider it.”

“That’s all I ask.” With that part of the conversation over, Quentin was ready to sign on the dotted line. 

Quentin got to his temporary room completely exhausted from the long day, and dropped off his bag and coats. But he and Jules promised to meet out on the main lawn by the Brakebills sign to talk. Wearily he made his way out the door and down the stairs. 

As he made his way to meet Julia, his mind reminded him of his meeting with Eliot. Quentin had not previously processed a word Eliot had said about tomorrow being a date. Which his brain reminded him of as he headed out into the night. He immediately began to freak out.

Julia would be able to help him process his interaction with Eliot. Luckily for Quentin, she also had been accepted at Brakebills and was now approaching him. They greeted each other with congratulatory hugs. They enjoyed a few minutes of childlike excitement at the prospect of learning magic just like they’d always dreamed. Finally, he proceeded to tell her about the cute guy who was way above his league but seemingly asking him on some kinda date.

“Well did _he_ call it a date?” Julia, ever so practically asked him. This is why he talked to her about this stuff, she helped him apply logic.

“Yes. He definitely said ‘date’. But I have no idea if it’s like a ‘friend’ date or a _date_ date. I mean, I don’t wanna assume and look like an ass. But I don’t want to offend if he _did_ mean it like that, you know?” Quentin babbled. It was something he did when he really cared about something, he babbled. He often babbled so fast he stammered as he tried to get all the words out as fast as they appeared in his head.

“Q, breathe. Deep breaths. Okay. You just met this guy, and he just met you. It's just a campus tour, so dress casual. You know, dress like you usually dress, keeping in mind to maybe wear a nicer button-down shirt. Don’t make any assumptions on his intentions. Think of it like a friendly meeting that might lead to more if the chemistry is there, okay? Treat him like a friend until he indicates further. Does that help?”

“Yes! Thank god you’re here, Jules,” Quentin hugged her in gratitude.

“I gotta ask one question, do _you_ want it to be a date, something more than friends?”

“I guess, maybe? I don’t know, I don’t really know him yet.”

“Right, silly question. You never want more till you know a person better.” Quentin was the type of person who fell in love with the person underneath, and his sexual attraction came from that, whatever the gender of the person in question.

“Yeah.”

“Still, how hot is he?” Julia asked.

“Oh, easily an 8.7,” Quentin said. 

“Oh, my god, Q, you’ve never given anyone you know an 8 before. He must be _really_ hot.”

“He’s probably hot enough to turn even straight boys’ heads,” he said, blushing.

Julia had helped him slow his thoughts and to think more logically rather than emotionally, which really helped him cope in many situations similar to this one. She was right, treat it like a friendly meeting and see where the day (and relationship) goes. 

“Want me to be there when he comes to find you tomorrow?”

“That’d be appreciated, but you don’t have to,” Quentin said, not wanting to inconvenience his friend.

“I know. But it might help you get a clue as to his sexual preferences with me there. Still, it might be useful for me to meet a returning student, get a feel for the campus, get a rundown of the professors and classes,” Julia replied.

“Oh I see. You want to come for your own benefit. Okay, let's meet here and find where we can get breakfast together tomorrow morning.”

“Good. I’d love to talk all night but I think the magic wore me out. Bed?”

“Yeah, me too. See you tomorrow, magic girl,” Quentin teased.

“You, too, magic boy,” Julia returned. Julia headed to her rooms on the third floor and Quentin went back to his. Tomorrow could wait. Tonight he needed sleep.

T.B.C. . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. My cat had kittens over the weekend and I was distracted.


	4. Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot and Margo give Quentin and Julia a tour of Brakebills.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not late this week. Chapter updates have been moved to Tuesdays. I'm not sure I will be updating next week. I'm going to spend the next week working on studying for my Registered Behavioral Technician test for my job. 
> 
> It will also give me some time to get ahead in my writing. The last chapter took me 2 weeks to write and was a pain. I write many chapters ahead of what I'm posting, and I don't want to get behind and not finish the story at all.

**CHAPTER 4: FRIENDS**

**Saturday 8/29/2015**

* * *

Quentin was not the type of person who generally remembered his dreams. Which is why the fact that he remembered his dreams the following morning was all the more strange. Sure they were vague and hazy memories like all memories of dreams were, but it was odd that he remembered them at all.

In the dream he had seen a small cottage with a big square plot outside. It seemed to be a puzzle with colored tiles instead of pieces. He had seen a starry night and a candlelit dinner with him… and Eliot. Dream-Eliot had said something about an anniversary when he offered a toast. Dream-Q had understood the meaning, but awake-Quentin didn’t know what that was about.

Dream-Quentin had leaned up and kissed dream-Eliot. It was just a small, quick, and fairly chaste kiss, even if it was on the lips. Based on the butterflies he thought it might have been a first kiss, but that was just a guess. Dream-Eliot had smiled and then leaned over, wrapping his hand around the backside of dream-Quentin’s neck, and pulled him into a much deeper kiss, which dream-Quentin had most definitely returned with enthusiasm.

The two of them had definitely done some serious kissing, and possibly more, but he didn’t remember that far. So Quentin woke up with a smile, and feeling a bit… aroused. That called for a cold shower. He grabbed his shower bag and a change of clothes, absently wondering when his stuff had arrived and how, before dismissing the thought as unimportant. There was probably some house-elf like magic involved. Quentin took his stuff and headed into the adjoining shower that was through the door on the right side of the room. 

The bathroom had two small shower stalls on the left, opposite a double sink with a long plain mirror up above. On the other side of the sink was a toilet and another door was directly opposite the one he entered by. He thought that door probably went to another first-year room. The whole room was a boring shade of blue-grey, which still beat white or plain gray. 

Quentin began to relax under the cool water of his shower. He didn’t linger, wanting to go meet Julia and see Eliot again. He dressed in a clean pair of jeans, a nice button-down light blue shirt, and his sneakers. If they were going to be walking all around campus, best be prepared with appropriate footwear.

He ran a comb through his hair and examined his appearance in the mirror. He thought he pulled off a nice-casual look fairly well. He went back to his room to drop off his toiletry bag before heading out to the front door of the building to meet Julia. She was waiting to meet him wearing a pair of jeans and deep purple blouse. 

They had barely had time to greet each other when Eliot and a short brown skinned woman approached them from the west pathway. Eliot was dressed in dark gray slacks, a dark blue shirt, and beige vest today. The woman with Eliot was dressed in a short black skirt and an orange no sleeve blouse. She was about Julia’s height of five feet, maybe a few inches taller, with dark brown wavy hair that hung just past her shoulders. She looked to be of some mixed ethnicity, given her skin tone, and was just as gorgeous as Eliot. 

If Quentin had not met Eliot already he’d have been scared to approach either one of them. Both gave off a vibe that practically screamed “popular” and “don’t mess with me” simultaneously. He was a bit intimidated anyway, but they came to him so hopefully it wouldn’t be a disaster.

“Quentin!” Eliot called. “Just the person I was looking for.”

“Hi, I’m Margo,” said the woman beside Eliot, looking Quentin up and down. Quentin felt a bit like a piece of meat on display at her look. Julia at least, noticed the flirty smile Margo shot Quentin. Quentin himself remained clueless.

“So, this is him.” Margo said thoughtfully. Quentin felt a thrill go through him that Eliot had already told what was clearly a close friend (or girlfriend, the self-doubting side of him thought) about him already. At Eliot’s affirmative hum Margo added, “He’s not _that_ cute.” 

Julia raised her eyes at that. She sensed a similar bond between Margo and Eliot as she had with Q. If he was talking about him, and called Quentin “cute” then he was probably interested. But he also seemed the casual sex type, she’d have to have a private word with him at some point about the dangers of messing with Q on her watch. Q couldn’t do casual, it wasn’t in his nature.

Eliot hummed an affirmative at Margo’s words before protesting with an exclaimed, “Bambi!” He should have expected her to do that again, but he was still caught off guard. Still, he had to make his interest in pursuing Quentin obvious to him somehow and Margo’s comments could only help- he hoped.

Margo had been looking forward to meeting the cute nerd-puppy her best friend claimed to be in love with. The guy was good-looking enough, not plain by any means, nor was he really super attractive. But if Eliot had fallen for looks alone she’d have been disappointed. She would have to get to know the guy before calling it.

“Hi,” Quentin replied, eyes briefly glancing at Margo before turning back to Eliot. He was still looking at him with such intensity that made Quentin wish he had some telepathy or even empathy to know what was behind that look in his eyes. A small cough to his right reminded him he also had someone to introduce.

“Right, sorry. This is Julia, my best friend. Julia, this is Eliot, and Margo apparently.”

“Hey,” Julia greeted the two arrivals. Eliot was just as hot as Quentin had told her, and his friend was even hotter. She might have worried for Q with Eliot arriving with a girl as hot as Margo, but the look on Eliot’s face spoke volumes to her if not to Q. Eliot was totally into Quentin. He had only briefly given her a glance and friendly smile before turning to watch Quentin. 

“Hi Julia, welcome to Brakebills. It’s not often that two friends both pass the entrance exam. I’m Eliot, this is my platonic soulmate, Margo,” Eliot said. So it was a best friend relationship between Eliot and Margo, good. And he was defining it so early which clearly said he had his eyes on Quentin and didn’t want him to feel threatened by Margo.

“Julia, nice to meet you,” said Margo. “I’m here to make sure you’re familiar with the campus before classes start.”

“Oh, good. It’ll be nice to get advice from students who aren’t new. You’re both returning students, right?”

“Yup, second years. I totally get the whole, ‘what the fuck, magic is real?’ thing you’re going through. I went through it last year. Stick with us kiddos, and you’ll be fine,” said Margo, wrapping a friendly arm around Julia.

While Julia and Margo talked Eliot just watched Quentin. He seemed happier than he had the last time Eliot gave him the campus tour. With his childhood best friend joining him this time he seemed more settled, more relaxed. Eliot was glad for him. He knew he hated to be separated from his Bambi. Was it his immignation or was Q dressed a bit nicer than last time? Had he caught the interest Eliot had hinted at yesterday, was that why he had dressed up a bit?

Quentin was also watching Eliot. He’d check with Julia later, but he thought that Eliot might actually be interested in him. He had glanced at Julia when Quentin had introduced her but quickly turned his eyes back on Quentin. 

“Hey,” Eliot said softly. Greeting just Quentin now.

“Hi.”

“Sleep okay?”

“Yeah, you?”

“Yeah. How's your roommate?”

“A dick. Also, I think he reads minds.”

“Psychic. That sucks. Don’t worry, I can help teach you some mental wards to block him out. I know a few I can cast on you till you can cast some yourself.”

“Really? That’d be great. My mind… I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, even my jackass of a roommate.” Eliot just smiled at that. He wanted to tell him that his mind was beautiful and Eliot would love to be granted the access that Penny had, but kept his mouth shut. 

“You look nice,” Eliot finally said, changing the topic.

“Um, thanks,” Quentin said, blushing at the compliment. 

“ELIOT!” came a loud voice from beside them. Apparently the girls had been waiting on them and Margo was now done waiting.

“My sincerest apologies, Bambi. Well, we have a tour to give. Shall we,” Eliot said with a bow, extending his elbow to Margo with an exaggerated gentlemanly manner. Margo took his elbow and they proceeded to lead Quentin and Julia on a tour of the campus.

Eliot and Margo showed Quentin and Julia the crucial places any first year could ever want to know. The first years started in the dorm rooms where Quentin and Julia were currently housed. Once you had your discipline you moved into the house with your emphasis. 

“Or you flunk out, in which case buh-bye. But you wouldn’t care ‘cause you won’t remember,” Margo butt in on Eliot's narration.

“Margo!” Eliot hissed. She was gonna scare Quentin, and Eliot wasn’t going to let her. Margo gave him a look that said ‘This is who I am, grow a pair of tits and deal with it!’

Eliot rolled his eyes. “You won’t flunk out, okay?” Eliot directed his words to Quentin.

“Never flunked before in my life,” Julia declared completely unphased by Margo’s comments.

“Neither had any other student who flunked out. All magicians are crazy smart, with more brains than everyone else in their high school. But that doesn't mean anything here, got it?” Margo warned her.

“What Bambi is saying is don’t count on your smarts like you did before you got here. Magic takes a new level of brainy. Don’t take it for granted that you will do well, okay?” Eliot told them.

Margo was shocked at how different Eliot was around the two first years. She heard what he had said about the crap he had been through the past few years for him, but she didn’t think it would change how he interacted with other people so much. But then, Quentin wasn’t “other people” to him. Eliot was in ‘protector’ mode, which she’d only ever seen him do on her behalf before. This was going to take some adjusting.

Julia ignored the slight in favor of pressing for information. “What areas of magic are there?”

“Physical kids, telekinesis, move shit, lift shit, most can fly- well levitate,” Eliot rattled off as he jumped to grab an apple that a couple of students were floating in the air. “Also, the best partiers on campus. Do _not_ come by our house if you have anything important to do the next morning.”

“Or if you want to remember it the next day, we have the best booze and drugs on campus.” Margo added.

“You’re both physical students?” Quentin asked. Shit. They were self-declared party students, he should have known. They’d be sure to dump his ass once they saw how awfully socially awkward he was at parties, he just knew it.

“Yep. Eliot is the best party host ever,” Margo crowed.

“Don’t worry, _everyone_ enjoys my parties. I take pride in making sure all my guests are comfortable,” Eliot said with a meaningful glance at Quentin. What meaning he meant to convey, Quentin didn’t have a hope of deciphering. 

But Eliot smiled at him, and he did his best to return it without nerves. Quentin took heart from the fact that Eliot was paying him so much attention now. Maybe they could still be friends after they saw how bad he was at parties.

“Then there’s illusions, healing, nature, knowledge,” Eliot continued the tour where he left off, pointing to groups of students performing different magics as he mentioned each specialty. 

The physical students had been floating apples in various formations, clearly manipulating each individual fruit. What the illusion or healing students were doing besides moving their hands Quentin couldn’t figure out. Clearly their brand of magic wasn’t as visually obvious as physical magic. The nature students were doing something that created a cloud in the middle of their circle. The knowledge students were the fewest and performing the most complicated magic, or so it appeared to Quentin.

“What do the knowledge students do?” Julia asked.

“Most create new spells and magics from scratch or stitching together old spells,” Eliot said. Sounded like a nice brand of magic to be part of, Julia thought.

“Psychics,” Eliot whispered, pointing to two students who sat on a bench facing one another. “Mind magics, boring,” he stage-whispered.

“We heard that,” the two psychic students said in exact unison. No, not said. Their lips had not moved. Telepathic, then. Creepy.

As the group of four continued they passed two students very different from all the others. The two were not performing any kind of magic, they simply walked from where ever they had been to wherever they were going. They both looked only at the ground, forlornly, not responding to the presence of the four of them at all. 

“What? Who are they?” Quentin asked, staring after the two students.

“Third years,” Eliot replied. “Most of their class mysteriously disappeared. Sixteen out of the original twenty are missing.” 

“No one knows what happened to them,” Margo said.

“They’re just gone?” 

“Rumor has it they were killed,” Margo said. 

Eliot looked away. The third year disappearance was not a mystery to him anymore. He and his friends had discovered their story when trying to stop the beast. He hadn’t told Margo this in his summary last night either. A Traveler in their class took them to Fillory. The beast had killed most of them. One escaped to the Neitherlands, with the help of the Traveler. The Traveler, Victoria, was trapped in the beast’s castle. Now was not the time to be telling them about that. 

“We all signed this waiver, I hope you read it. It says ‘Spell work is not unlikely to murder you and, if so, oh, well.’” Margo said.

“What, seriously?” asked Julia.

“More or less. So don’t go experimenting with magic, kids, got it? Stay on the garden path.”

“At least, not alone. Always have back up,” Eliot added. After all, when he had done this before Battle Magic was forbidden. If they hadn’t done forbidden magic they’d have been killed. “If you want to try new stuff, ask us first.” 

Margo gave him a funny look that neither Quentin nor Julia could interpret. The tour continued with the experienced two pointing out the food hall, academic buildings, green houses, the library.

“Boring,” Margo whispered, pointing to the library, like it was a secret.

“I like libraries,” Julia said.

“Of course you do,” Margo said in a patronizing tone. Margo led them through the rest of the tour, with Eliot adding when he felt his input was essential. As they walked they had rearranged themselves. By the time the tour was complete Margo walked beside Julia up front and Eliot walked next to Quentin behind the girls. 

Slowly Quentin relaxed in the presence of his new friends. He may not understand why the two popular ones had chosen to take him and Julia under their wing, but they clearly had. He was grateful that for now, at least, he had these two as friends.

“Bambi, it’s getting time for lunch,” Eliot called to her.

The girls stopped and turned around to face the boys. “Should we head to the food hall then?” Julia suggested.

Both Margo and Eliot gasped in overdramatic shock. “Perish the thought! We need actual food fit for human consumption,” Eliot said. 

Quentin and Julia exchanged confused looks but followed them. It turned out that Eliot liked to cook, and he was good at it too. He had prepared a special dish just for them to welcome them properly. It was some kind of dish with venison and vegetables. 

“See the cottage has this spell on it that keeps any food free from the effects of time,” Margo explained as they sat in the cottage kitchen eating the food Eliot had fixed yesterday. 

“What spell is it? What’s it called?” Julia asked, her thirst for knowledge evident.

“No one knows. Probably some experiment a student tried that just never went away. Most of the spells on the cottage are written down, but there’s no record of anything that should stop food from going bad,” Margo informed them.

As they talked they shared stories of how they met each other. Julia told them about meeting Quentin as kids and bonding over shared genius and love of fantasy. Margo regaled them with meeting Eliot on the first day of class and using him to get a pushy boy to stop following her.

“I knew he had to be gay, he was too well dressed not to be,” Margo said.

“Don’t stereotype, Bambi,” Eliot admonished.

“Don’t play the stereotype, then. Anyway, the dude was a total baby and ran off crying, totally missing his first class. I think he flunked out a week later. I know he was gone by-”

“Bambi! First-years, remember,” Eliot called, warning her off from mentioning something.

“I wasn’t gonna spill, jeez who do you think I am, Todd?” 

“God, no, I would never insult you so,” Eliot said with dramatic flair.

The four new friends wrapped up their meal and cleaned up. Then Margo and Eliot let the two new students wander around without their guides. “We have a few things to take care of before classes start on Monday. I’d rather get them done and over with sooner rather than later.” Eliot told them.

“Oh, okay,” said Quentin in a small voice. Eliot immediately placed a hand on his shoulder, recognizing the tone of fear and hurt in his voice.

“Hey, we’ve got all day tomorrow to continue getting to know each other, right Q?” Eliot said in a soft voice.

Quentin just stared into his eyes trying to read his intention, his heart, inside those eyes. He seemed so sincere, so Quentin nodded, agreeing that they could hang out tomorrow.

* * *

MARGOELIOT

“Is he always like that?” Margo asked Eliot later that night. Margo and Eliot now lay back on the bed in his room with their glasses of wine in hand, relaxing.

“Like what?” Eliot asked.

“Awkward. Skittish.”

“Yeah, usually. He mellowed out with age, but that was in another lifetime.” Eliot said.

“He’s cute, I’ll give you that.”

“He’s more than cute, Bambi. He’s… true, earnest, pure. He doesn’t hide anything about who he is, he can’t. He always got so much shit for it, as a kid, in high school, undergrad, even here at Brakebills.”

“Hmm. No armor?” she asked. She had stuff she’d have gotten shit for if she didn’t scare people off first. She had long ago learned to hide those parts in the deepest recesses of herself and never let anyone in. Eliot was the same way, she knew.

“Not with the depression and anxiety he has. Penny 23 once told me that mental health illnesses actually tear down the mind’s natural barriers. He studied it when Quentin 23 couldn’t get a decent ward on his mind.”

“So what, depression equals no mind defenses?”

“I guess. I’ve got wards I plan to teach Q, but he’ll have to apply them more than you or I would to combat the depression tearing them back down.”

Margo just hummed in response. Everything Eliot had told her the other night had been proven thus far. Quentin was as cute as a puppy and had a clear love of the Fillory books. Eliot had intentionally made a reference that Quentin had picked up on immediately. 

Quentin’s whole demeanor had changed while talking about the series he still clearly loved. He became more animated and passionate and she had started to see the appeal. It was going to be nice to have a friend she could be a little geeky with when she was in the mood. 

Julia was as badass as Eliot had told her. Margo had been a bit shocked to see two people waiting for them to show them around, but Eliot had called it. He had told her that Quentin would be with Julia when they found them. She had seen the almost sibling-like relationship between the two, it was similar to her and Eliot but more goofy, less flirty.

“Be careful with your teasing of Q, Bambi, okay? Quentin can’t read people’s tone of voice or body language very well.” Margo had learned this about Quentin herself last time, and had learned how she could tease him without hurting him inadvertently.

“Are you seriously telling me to lay off him?” she said with ice in her voice.

“Never. I know how you show affection and would never ask you to change a thing. I just ask you to be more obvious when teasing with him, okay?”

She pondered that in her head before acquiescing. That wasn’t too big an ask. But she had to make sure that Quentin could handle their shit. She had to test him, that’s what she did.

“Julia give you the best friends ‘if you hurt him’ threats yet?” Margo asked.

“Not yet. It won’t be long though. Are you going to issue your own?”

“Try and stop me.”

“I missed this, just being. No crisis to solve, no beasts trying to kill us, no world to save.”

“Has it really been that bad for you?”

“The only time we get a vacation or break is when we are in the infirmary- which means we are in pain and so it’s not restful. The last vacation I had was the-” he cut himself off, the memories painful.

“The what?”

“The mosaic. That was the last rest I had.”

“Damn. How long ago was that?”

“More than a year ago.”

“Shit. And you volunteered to do it all over again?”

“It was either that or never rest again. I’d take on the world with Q before resting for one second without him.”

“Speaking of taking on the world, what’s next?”

“Do you believe me yet?” Eliot asked.

“Not sure. But your predictions so far have been spot on. We met Quentin, and Julia was right next to him like you said she would be. She has brains and he’s awkward, like you said. For now, I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt.”

“Gracious of you,” Eliot said.

“I’m a very gracious person.”

“That you are.”

“So what’s next?”

“Well, next we let the first years settle in and start learning magic. Meanwhile, you and I relearn (or discover, in my case) what we can of Fillory from the books. We start meditating twice a day.”

“Twice?!”

“That’s what the book recommends for beginners. Once in the morning for ten to thirty minutes. Once at night for sixty minutes minimum. Just until we can reach that quiet place within ten minutes of mediating, that will indicate we are getting the hang of it.” 

This afternoon after they finished showing Quentin and Julia around they had picked up a few books from the Brakebills library as well as a bookstore Margo knew in the Muggle world to begin their preparations for fighting the beast. They now had available to them a collection of meditation books, the whole “Fillory and Further” series, and a couple advanced magic books. Margo had wanted to get the battle magic books but Eliot had pointed out that they should practice more offensive magic they knew they could actually use first.

“When do we bring in the first years?”

“Next week. Alice is going to do something stupid, and the beast is going to come attack the school, Quentin in particular. I’d love to prevent it, but it was recommended to leave that alone as it will help them understand the danger of the beast. They won’t take me or it seriously without that. I’m gonna make sure I'm nearby, ready to help fight him off.”

“Wait, the beast you said killed most of us in the previous timelines, you’re just going to let him attack Quentin?”

“No! I’m not going to just- but they need to understand how much danger they are all in. That attack will be a warning as to what’s coming to kill them if we fail. I’ll be there to send him back to Fillory.”

“Shouldn’t we just warn dean Fogg so he can defend them?”

“No. He already knows. He remembers previous timelines and last time he lost his eyes and hands trying to stop the beast by himself. This time I’ll be there as added back-up, which will hopefully mean he won't be so badly injured.”

“Then I’ll be there, too.”

“I know you will. But from what Quentin told me the beast had the power to freeze everyone in their seats. We’ll have to be careful.”

“Is there anyone else we should have on hand?”

“No one we can trust to throw enough battle magic. Kady will be able to shoot some battle spells once she is free from the time spell.”

“Kady is a battle magician?”

“No, but she has practiced battle magic before. I don’t remember what her discipline was. We weren’t that close.”

“Okay, so when does Alice Quinn pull a stupid?”

“In about three weeks, at midnight. I want to talk to all five of them and tell them I’m from the future before that happens. When they blow me off for being crazy, and the beast comes the next day...”

“They’ll have to believe you. But Eliot, is it guaranteed the beast will attack again?”

“Fogg says most likely, but not a hundred percent, no.”

“If he doesn’t come how will you convince them?”

“I also know the discipline for most of them, except Kady. I know things they won’t tell anyone else, right now.”

“Well that might convince them, or it might just piss them off.”

“I know, Bambi. It’s the best we got, though.”

“What time of day is the actual attack?”

“Noon. They were in Professor Stitch’s class.”

“Ugh. That guy is so boring,” Margo said.

“He died last time,” Eliot replied.

“Well, shit. Anyone else bite it?”

“No, Fogg and Kady responded before anyone else got killed.”

“Alright. Mission “protect Quentin from the Beast” is a go. Now enough doom and gloom, let's talk about something fun! When are we throwing our “Welcome back/to Brakebills” bash?”

“Really, Bambi, a party?” Eliot wasn’t sure this was the right time.

“Yes, a party . You need to relax and show the rest of the campus you’re still king around here,” she said firmly.

“That’s not really all that important, right now-” Eliot tried.

“I know it doesn’t seem so important in the face of this beast, but you gotta put that aside some times, El. You need to relax and remember what you want to live for. You’re burnt out, and I’m gonna help you. Besides, we can invite Julia and Quentin and you can spend some time with him.”

“Okay, okay, you win. Maybe a party will help. It certainly can’t hurt.”

* * *

QMCEWQMCEW

Julia and Quentin lay on her bed like they often did, curled into their sides and completely at ease with one another. They had gone back to Quentin’s room after Margo and Eliot left them to their own devices that afternoon. But both of them thought Quentin’s roommate, “Penny”, was a complete dick and were avoiding him before Julia punched his lights out.

It was approaching midnight and Julia was already in her favorite plum pj pants and camisole top. She especially loved the butterflies that were scattered throughout it in various colors. Quentin had braved his room long enough to grab a pair of loose pj pants and stretched out T-shirt that he frequently slept in, which he had changed into when they got to Julia’s dorm room. Her roommate was currently out. 

“Eliot seems really interested in you,” Julia said.

“It wasn’t just my imagination?” Quentin asked.

“Nope. He only had eyes for you. With as close as he and Margo seem I think they’d have hooked up by now if they were both straight. And she showed no inclination to bat for the home team. Plus, you heard Margo say he was gay, didn’t you?”

“Was it me, or was she a little bit scary?”

“Oh, totally. That woman is not one to trifle with. But I think she may have a soft core,” Julia said.

“Soft core?!” Quentin laughed.

“Don’t laugh. You know what I mean. Her outer persona is a facade, I think.” Quentin hummed in response. “Still, another _Fillory_ fan, gotta be pleased with that, right?”

“Yeah, I was a bit surprised that a girl like her was into it. But she really knew her stuff,” Quentin said. Very few people he knew even heard of Fillory, and so if you hadn’t read the books you really couldn’t fake it like you could with mainstream fantasy like _Harry Potter_.

“I think she liked having someone she can be a bit nerdy with,” Julia said thoughtfully.

“If she’s in the habit of protecting herself, yeah, I can see that. I wish I could hide it,” he said a bit forlornly.

“Don’t be, Q. I keep telling you to be true to who you are. I like that you are real and honest.”

“Yeah, but you are just about the only one who doesn’t usually give me shit for it. It’d be nice, just for once, to be the kind of guy who can hide that kind of thing and just blend in with the masses.”

“Eliot didn’t give you any grief, did he?” she asked, wanting to be sure that he could be who he was and not have to hide if this guy really did ask him out.

“No, though I heard him give Margo some teasing.”

“Naturally. Can you believe we are in an actual school for magic!” Julia squealed again. This was the twelfth time this evening she had said it, and it still had not sunk into her head yet.

“Hogwarts students, Hermione, we are actual _Hogwarts students_ ,” Quentin said. He always calls her Hermione when talking about Harry Potter. He was Ron, naturally. Perfectly average student, only he also had Harry’s self-worth issues. Naturally the worst part of both boys.

“That we are, Martin,” Julia said, switching to calling him by his Fillorian play-name. The name of the character he played when they pretended they were in Fillory as kids. She absolutely refused to call him Ron, knowing why he considered himself akin with that character. Quentin loved her for it. 

“What do you want your discipline to be?”

“Oh god, I don’t know. Each has their perks, right? Flying, that’d be so cool. So would telepathy or other psychic abilities.”

“Eliot warned me that we’d probably know already if we had psychic magic. Apparently, they have no off switch. If you have a psychic power you are stuck hearing whatever there is to hear 24/7.”

“Ouch. Okay, so not psychic then, thank god for small miracles. What about illusions?”

“No way to tell till you start doing spells, Eliot said. Of course, he also said illusion kids can make you think you see shit, while physical kids actually do shit,” Quentin said.

“Sure, he’s totally biased towards his own discipline. According to Margo, Eliot’s one of the most naturally talented telekinetic kids ever seen at Brakebills.”

“Really?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

“No.”

“Yeah. Didn’t get to go into detail as we passed the library right after.”

“And my Hermione was distracted by all the books, of course.” Julia just smiled without shame for her love of books.

“Did either of them tell you how all our personal stuff got here?” Quentin asked.

“Margo just said it was some custom spell work by an old professor decades ago. That way first years don’t have to go back into the Muggle world so early and risk getting lost.”

“Makes sense I guess. Oh, and speaking of Muggles, what about James?”

“Oh, fuck. I forgot all about him. The last 36 hours have just been crazy, you know?”

“I’m not judging. I just thought you should start thinking about what you are going to tell him, if anything.”

“Yeah, you’re right. It’ll be hard to keep our relationship strong if I can’t tell him about magic.”

“Yeah, you’ll have to make a decision about what to do about that. And long-distance relationships suck. Plus the magic messes with cell reception here. I tried to call my dad after lunch and noticed I had zero bars on my cell.”

“Shit.”

“That’s why the old-style pay phone with a landline. Only reliable way to get calls out.”

“Well, I’m not making a decision yet. I need to think about it.”

“Sure, but call him soon, or he’ll worry.”

“Have you talked with him since the party Saturday night?”

“Not yet. I’m gonna give him a ring after classes Monday.”

“And on that note we should try getting some sleep. You gonna head back to your room with the dickhead?”

“I probably should. That’s where my stuff is.”

They lay there quietly for a few minutes before Julia finally spoke again. “I notice you don’t seem to be going anywhere.”

“Nope, too comfy,” said a sleepy voice from her right. 

“Then sleep here,” she suggested.

“‘K,” came the soft mumble.

“Night, Q,”

“Night…”

T.B.C. . . .


	5. Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day before classes begin Eliot and Quentin get to know each other better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I finished my online training. I decided to celebrate by posting this now.  
> I'm having trouble with chapter 13, the one I'm trying to write at the moment. If any reader/writer wants to help let me bounce idea off you, please let me know.

**CHAPTER 5: GHOSTS**

**Sunday 8/30/2015**

* * *

Quentin woke up the following Sunday morning to a loud voice screeching, “Who are you and what the hell are you doing in my room!!” 

Blearily blinking his eyes open, he saw a girl with bleach blonde hair down just past her shoulders and big red glasses on her face. He looked around in confusion as he tried to get his sleepy brain functioning. He was alone in the small bed- he didn't think he’d been alone when he had fallen asleep. That thought jogged his memory, reminding him of where he was. He had fallen asleep in Julia’s dorm room when they spent the previous night talking about Brakebills and Eliot.

Looking down he noticed a note on the nightstand. It read: “ _Q, gonna shower. Meet you up front for breakfast if you wake before I’m back, J.”_ That explained why the bed was empty. 

“Well. Are you gonna talk or do I throw you out by force?” said the pissy blonde.

“Sorry, Jules and I were talking last night, I fell asleep. I’m Quentin. You’re Julia’s roommate?” Quentin asked, trying to be friendly despite the girl’s hostile attitude.

“Hmm. Yes, this is _my_ room,” she said a bit snarkily. She did not offer her hand or name. Clearly she wanted him gone, right now. 

“Well, sorry to startle you…”

“You didn’t. But you can get out,” she was definitely making a demand and not a suggestion.

Not wanting to argue so early in his day he merely nodded at the girl. He got up from the bed and left the blonde in Julia’s room without further delay. Quentin quietly made his way back to his own room to shower and change. It was still fairly early in the morning and there were no classes yet so he didn’t pass but one of two students in the hallways.

Thankfully, his roommate Penny wasn’t in their room, Quentin wasn’t in the mood to put up with that jerk right now. He grabbed a clean pair of underwear, jeans, and a long sleeve green polo style shirt to change into when he was done with his shower. He left his clothes on the sink and stepped under the water, feeling more awake as the water washed over him.

Feeling more human and less like a zombie now that he was clean and dressed he went to the front doors of the dorm building. Julia was waiting for him just outside the doors wearing casual jeans and blue sleeveless blouse. She smiled at him as he approached.

“Morning, Q!”

“Morning, Jules,” he called back. “Is your roommate always so cheery?”

“Alice? I haven’t seen much of her. She barely said a word to me, I only know her name because it was on my room assignment sheet.”

“Well, she’s a lot like my own roommate, a dick.”

“Sorry,” she said.

“Not your fault. Let's take a walk, shall we?” The two began to wander around the campus much as they had yesterday.

It was only a few minutes later they heard a voice calling for them. When they turned around they saw Eliot and Margo heading towards them.

* * *

ELIOTWAUGHTER

Meanwhile at the physical cottage that same morning Eliot barged into Margo’s room as easily as he entered his own. He was dressed and ready to face the day and spend time getting to know Quentin all over again. But he wanted a word with his best friend before they tracked down his favorite nerd. Margo was still getting dressed and was unperturbed at his entrance in her undressed state. Margo knew she was gorgeous and never minded an opportunity to show off her beauty no matter her state of dress, or undress.

“Bambi, I need some time to hang out with Quentin alone. I need your diversionary skills to distract his bestie, please?” Eliot asked Margo as he sat on her bed.

“Shouldn’t we work on planning tonight’s party?” Margo asked, readjusting her breasts in her bra till she was satisfied they were perfectly placed.

“Wait, _tonight’s_ party? When did we decide to throw a party tonight?” Eliot sat up in alarm. He wasn’t ready for a party! He thought he would have a week before he absolutely had to throw a party. He was the party king of Brakebills, he knew, but he hadn’t had the opportunity to throw a proper party in _years_. He wasn’t sure he was up to the task just yet.

“Last night,” Margo said, slipping into her blue pantsuit.

“Margo, I don’t have time to plan a party. I promised Quentin we’d hang out today. I can’t go breaking promises like that so soon, he’ll freak out on me!” He couldn’t scare Quentin off so soon, he’ll never get back into his confidence. Eliot couldn’t have that happening.

“Chill, El. You can have him help you plan the party,” she said, now running styling products into her hair.

“I’d love that, but his advice will be to provide beer and music. And leave him a hide-y hole to disappear into. Besides, party planning won’t give us a chance to talk. You know what a party at the cottage needs, can’t you and Julia handle it?”

“So you want me to plan the party without you? Come on, this is our thing!” She had her hands on her hips, Margo for ‘you are doing this’. “It’s the first party of the year, we have to kill it! I need your help.”

“I know, I know, Bambi. But I’m not in a head-space to plan a party right now and I _need_ to spend some time letting Quentin get to know the real me. Before I have to tell him I’ve got future memories where he’s kinda my husband,” Eliot pleaded with her.

“Ugh. The things I do for you. Alright, Eliot, I will see if Julia is any use in party planning. But El, I want you close by in case I need, or want, your input, okay?”

“Promise, Bambi, we’ll stay close to the cottage. You are wonderful, magnificent, and I owe you.”

“You know I’ll collect, bitch.” 

“You’d better. I hate owing anyone, even you, bitch,” Eliot declared. Looking her over, he thought she might be done fixing her appearance for the day. “Are you ready, then?”

“Just need to apply my makeup. Give me a few minutes,” Margo said, going into her en-suite bathroom. Eliot waited patiently on her bed, imagining what he would say to Quentin when he saw him.

“How do I look?” Margo inquired when she came back in, looking over at him.

Eliot looked her up and down like the piece of meat she liked to be ogled as. He may be into men, sexually speaking, but he could still appreciate the beauty of the female form. And Margo Hansen had one of the best bodies he’d ever seen in a woman. “Gorgeous, as always, my dear. Certainly better looking than any goddess I’ve ever met,” he informed her.

Margo nodded pleased but unsurprised at his response, then did a double take as his words registered. “Wait, you’ve actually met real goddesses, right?”

“Was actually friends with one, too,” he agreed.

“I’m better looking?” she asked with actual interest in her voice. She might be assured of her beauty but hearing that she was more beautiful than _actual goddesses_ was still an ego booster. 

“Most definitely,” he promised.

“Good. Let's go find your boy. Are you telling him anything today?”

“No. He needs time to get to know me. With his history he doesn’t need my future knowledge crap right now.” Margo grabbed Eliot’s arm and they made their way downstairs and out the cottage. 

“Yeah, but you can’t wait too long either, babe. If you want us to have the best chance of surviving this beast you say is coming, then you need to help them prepare. Everyone’s got to be ready to fight it.”

“I know. Give me two weeks. Then I promise to tell him.”

Margo let it go for now as she knew he was afraid of losing Quentin by telling him too soon. So she changed the topic. “Did you get any reading done yesterday?”

“I glanced over the meditation books, and tried to practice what I’d read before I went to bed. I’m not sure I really reached a quiet place mentally yet, but the texts assure me it may take a few days or weeks to find it.”

“Good. I read the first chapter of another mediation book, and I put what it said to use. Same results as you, though. I also looked at that ‘Physical Fighting Magic’ book we checked out of the library. It seems to have what we need. It had some practical uses for physical magic in a magical fight. We should both practice it.”

“We'll have to take an hour or two every day to practice any spells that might come in handy. I did start reading the first Fillory book.”

“You did?! That’s great. I can’t believe you were king of the place and _still_ hadn’t read the actual books! How you managed to rule the real life Fillory without any knowledge of it, I have no idea. How far are you?”

“About five chapters.”

They had to drop their conversation after that as they spotted Quentin and Julia ahead of them. Eliot wasted no time going right up to Quentin and putting his arm around him in a half hug. It might be too soon for that, but he could only restrain himself so much. Besides, he and Quentin had always been very physically affectionate with each other starting almost immediately after their first meeting. Margo just gave them both a little wave.

“Good morning, Quentin,” Eliot said softly. He still had to bite back the urge to hug him fully, or kiss him. Hugging him sideways helped as he could keep his eyes on other things besides Quentin, though of course they kept darting back to Quentin.

Quentin smiled at him in return, leaning in to Eliot’s half-hug. Eliot smiled brightly at the response. “Hi, Eliot.”

“Morning,” Margo said, as if slightly miffed about Eliot’s attention being elsewhere. 

“Morning, guys,” said Julia in a friendly manner. She was unphased that Eliot's greeting was for Quentin and not herself. She’d definitely say he was smitten with her best friend.

Eliot shot Margo a pointed look, as if Margo needed reminding of what she had agreed to. “Julia, how are your party planning skills?” Margo asked.

Julia raised an eyebrow at that but responded anyway. “Depends on the occasion.”

“We have to have a welcome back bash at the cottage- tonight. I need someone to bounce ideas off of.”

“Well, sure, I’d be happy to help. But don’t you have Eliot for that? I would have thought the two of you would plan something like that together?” Julia was happy to offer her help but it seemed weird that Margo would ask someone she just met to help plan a party she was throwing when her best friend was right there.

“Oh, I’ve got other priorities for today,” Eliot filled in, with a small nod in Quentin’s direction. Julia raised her eyebrows at that. Eliot had just met Quentin and yet was blowing off his best friend to hang out with Quentin?

“But he’ll be there at the cottage so I can consult him if needed. Besides, he tends to the bar at our parties so he’s got plenty of party duties.”

“Not as much tonight, though,” Eliot added quickly, shooting his best friend a look.

Quentin looked up at Eliot with hopeful eyes. Eliot knew he was probably a bit nervous at the idea of attending a party so soon, the thought that his two friends besides Julia would be busy with hosting and bartending duties had to be ratcheting up his anxiety level.

“No?” Quentin asked. Eliot smiled at him. 

“I want to spend time with you,” he said simply.

“You’re not gonna trust the drinks to Todd?!” 

“Don’t be ridiculous. That boy doesn’t know his gin from his vodka. He absolutely cannot be trusted with making drinks.”

“Then who do you have in mind, hmm?” Asked Margo with a look that said ‘better not be me’. 

“Frank can do it acceptably. I’ll still take a turn behind the bar, don’t fret,” Eliot promised.

“We don’t need the kids thinking that Daddy ain’t gonna make the drinks.” Margo said firmly. 

“I know. They’d have heart attacks if I wasn’t behind the bar some of the time. Have you two had breakfast, yet? Want to come hang out at the physical cottage?” Eliot asked looking Quentin in the eyes. He hoped they weren’t begging, but he suspected they were.

“Yeah I ate already. You, Jules?”

“Same. We’d love to join you at the cottage.”

“Great! Then let’s go,” Eliot said, letting go of Quentin’s shoulders only to grab his arm, linking elbows with him in the old fashion gentlemanly way.

Before they knew it Eliot and Quentin were sitting on the patio outside the cottage and Margo and Julia were inside with pen and paper to write their ideas for the party down. Finally, Eliot was alone with Quentin. The only problem was he wasn’t sure how to start the conversation. 

You would think that after sixty years with the man he would have plenty of things to talk about. But everything he could think of was things he knew and shared with the Quentin who died. This young Quentin hadn’t told him about his depression. He hadn’t raised a kid with Eliot in past Fillory. He hadn’t brought Alice back from being a niffin. All of that had happened to another Quentin Coldwater. It was almost enough to make Eliot cry. He didn't realize how hard talking to Quentin might be when they were alone.

How bizarre was it that Eliot missed Quentin when he was right here? But as he had been warned, this Quentin and him did not have all that history between them. Technically, this Eliot also hadn’t lived those memories, it was another man who had been married to Quentin. Another Eliot who had been possessed for months only to wake up in a world to find Quentin had died. Yet Eliot remembered those times, all those trials and battles, all that pain and heartbreak. Eliot missed the Quentin who shared those memories with him. He suspected he always would.

“Tell me about your entrance to Brakebills?” Quentin asked him, breaking into Eliot’s thoughts. Eliot smiled. Leave it to Quentin to start a conversation even if he was supremely uncomfortable. 

“I was walking along the street in the city, heading to my favorite cafe. I’m sure I had a very good reason at the time, but I cannot remember for the life of me what it was. Then I turned the corner and found myself outside the main building on Brakebills campus. I found it odd, as I hadn’t done anything that would cause me to be somewhere else that I knew of-”

“Wait, wait. Did- um, did you… did you already _know?_ ” Quentin asked.

“About Brakebills? No.”

“No, I-I-I mean did you know magic was real?”

“Yes. I discovered I was telekinetic when I was fourteen. What universal forces allowed me to be able to move things with my mind, I didn’t know. Was I a mutant? Was I an alien? I had no idea.”

“Oh, so you just knew what you could do, no explanation as to why you could do it. Yeah, that probably sucked.”

“More than you know, Q,” Eliot said. He cursed silently to himself a second too late. Luckily, Quentin merely smiled at the use of his nickname. Maybe he assumed he had picked it up from Julia using it yesterday. 

“So, suddenly I was right outside the main building with a sign that said ‘Exam’ with an arrow pointing me to where I needed to go. Aced the exam, and here we are, one year later.”

“Didn’t you have anyone to greet you and guide you into the exam?”

“Nope. I was all on my own.”

“Why, I mean, why have students guided some potentials and not others?”

“I’ve no idea why the dean does or does not do anything at this school. For whatever reason he sent no one to guide me to the exam. And luckily he sent me to guide you to the exam.”

“Luckily?” Quentin asked shyly.

“Otherwise it’d have taken longer to meet you. That would be a massive shame, Quentin. Now we don’t have to wait. We’re already friends, and classes haven’t even started yet.”

“Yeah. I’m glad you were there. So, when were you assigned to the physical kids cottage?” Quentin asked with curiosity.

“Oh, it would have been immediate, but they didn’t run the test for that till my second month. I could have told them where to put me, but the professors tend to think we can’t tie our shoelaces without them.” 

Quentin laughed at that. Eliot’s heart swelled at the sound. It was so good to hear him laugh. He hadn’t heard that sound since they returned from the mosaic, not since he broke Quentin’s heart.

“What’s wrong?” Quentin asked. Eliot’s expression must be showing his sombering mood. He used to be able to hide his emotions behind a mask of indifference. Apparently it was slipping. Perhaps it was just because he was so used to not needing to mask himself around Quentin.

“What do you mean?” Eliot tried to brush it off.

“Why do you keep looking like your dog just died? Oh- god, did you have a dog just die? I’m so stup-” Eliot interrupted before he could finish his thought.

“Hey, don’t insult my friends. No, it’s just been a hard couple of years,” Eliot said truthfully, while still keeping his secret. He couldn’t lie to Quentin, not again. His last lie had been telling him, _‘That wasn’t us. Not when we have a choice_ ’. He refused to lie to him again.

“You want to talk about it?” Quentin asked, showing the empathy he was so readily capable of. It was one of the things Eliot loved about him. No matter what pain Quentin was going through he was always ready to help a friend. 

Eliot studied him a minute, internally debating the merits of that idea. Could he tell Quentin what kind of thoughts were running in his head in vague enough terms as to not reveal the truth so soon? How much should he tell him? Finally, he decided that as long as he didn’t go into detail or specifics it might help to talk about it.

“You mind?” Eliot asked, not wanting to burden him too soon, but also needing to talk about it.

“I’m listening,” Quentin replied.

“Well, I was away from my friends for a while, by myself and out of contact. Why doesn’t matter right now. What matters is, when I got back… one of my friends had died.” Eliot said, shuddering, the pain still fresh. 

“Eliot, man, I’m sorry. That- that sucks. Were you two close?” Quentin didn’t know what to say. He had felt like he was or wanted to die plenty of times in his life, but other than his grandparents he had never lost someone he was close to.

Eliot nodded in response to his question. “Not- not as close as either of us wanted, I think. And while I was away I finally realized that. I was gonna tell him- but I never got the chance.” 

Quentin had a shock go through him. He was as dense as one could be when it came to deciphering what people felt or thought based on social cues or body language. But when words were used, he was remarkably quick on the uptake. Eliot had clearly felt something for this friend. Maybe he’d even been in love, but the man had died before they got the chance.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to offload on you, Q. But you say or do things sometimes and suddenly all I can see is him. I see him dying, or the way he was when I last saw him. At times you remind me of him,” Eliot said, then winced. He shouldn’t have said that part. He didn’t need Quentin thinking Eliot was trying to use him to replace someone he lost, no matter how close to the truth that actually was.

Quentin was torn between happiness that Eliot was indicating some interest in him and anger that Eliot wasn’t seeing _him_ \- that he was seeing the one he lost. But from what Eliot said the loss was recent, he probably couldn’t help it. Quentin decided on sympathy. “I know it's hard Eliot, but you have to know, I’m not him. I’m me. I can’t replace him, that’s not fair to any of the three of us.”

“I know. I know that, Q. But you asked me what the look in my eyes is about. So I’m telling you, honestly. It’s the pain of loss.”

“What happened? To your… friend?”

“Some dick wanted something he had. Something that could hurt people if that guy got a hold of it. He did something to dispose of it and… it killed him,” Eliot said, trying to explain the gist and leave out the painful details. Leave out the things he didn’t want to remember.

“Sounds like he was a good man,” Quentin said.

“He was. So good, and kind, and noble…”

“At least he died trying to do the right thing, right?” Quentin said, trying to be comforting.

“The right thing?!” Eliot exploded. “No it wasn’t the right thing! We could have solved it together, like always. He could have just handed it over, lived to fight another day. We could have defeated that dick together. But no, he had to play hero. He left me alone. He gave up, Q, y- he gave up!” Eliot couldn’t hold back the anger at what Quentin 40 had done any longer. He was furious that Quentin had gone and gotten himself killed before Eliot got to see him again. Before Eliot got a chance to tell him how much he loved him. Why hadn’t he tried something else? They could have stopped Everett together if only Quentin hadn’t tried to take him on alone. 

Quentin paled at his words. Eliot knew that Quentin had already attempted suicide more than once, and had been hospitalized multiple times when he felt close to another attempt. Eliot knew this had to be hitting close to home to some of Quentin’s personal traumas. Eliot felt bad that he had just unloaded all that crap onto a Quentin who wasn’t to blame- at least not yet. Not ever, if Eliot had anything to say about it. 

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Eliot said. 

Quentin thought over Eliot’s words. It sounded like Eliot’s friend might have something else in common with himself. From what he was saying it sounded like the guy might have suffered from depression. Quentin was intimately familiar with that condition and what it did to people who suffered from it. Most people fail to understand that depression is like any other illness, without proper treatment the condition can be _fatal_. It’s called suicide when the depression wins.

The question was did Quentin want to get into his own issues with someone who was clearly suffering the loss of someone who may have had similar problems? Was he ready to dive into that deep hole with this man he only met two days ago? Did he want to start a relationship with Eliot who had lost someone to depression, knowing that Quentin himself may also leave him the same way some day? But Eliot looked so distraught that he had to help, even if it meant opening his own wounds.

“Depression?” Quentin asked to confirm his suspicions before opening that can of worms. 

“Yeah,” Eliot said.

“Depression sucks, Eliot. It’s like a voice inside your head constantly telling you that you’re not enough and nothing you ever do will ever be enough, to anyone, so why are you trying. You get that day in and day out, year after year, you'd do just about anything to shut it up. Even if it means you never think anything ever again.” Eliot looked up at him, hope and pain in his eyes. 

Here was Eliot’s chance to begin a dialogue about Quentin’s depression. The depression that Eliot knew might someday kill him- again. “You?” he asked gently.

“Yeah,” said Quentin, looking away as if ashamed. 

“Hey, it’s not your fault. Trust me I know. I may be mad that he couldn’t fight anymore, but I spent enough time around him to understand how depression attacks your mind. You have nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about. You got me, Coldwater?”

“No one ever seems to agree with that opinion. Everyone always acts like its a fucking choice,” Quentin said.

“I know it's not. You can’t remove depression on your own anymore than you can remove a bullet by yourself. You getting treatment?” Eliot asked, hoping it wasn’t too personal for their new friendship.

“Yeah, I’m on meds for it. Fogg… Fogg suggested I see some specialist here at Brakebills about it.”

“I can see why he would. Magic comes from pain, he may be worried that being medicated will affect your magic.”

“What do you mean?”

“Magic doesn’t come from any innate talent. It comes from pain. The more pain you have, the stronger your magic might be.”

“So you think that being on meds that keep my pain at bay might affect my magic?” asked Quentin, alarmed at the thought that the meds that helped him function might limit his magical aptitude. If he had to choose between them, which would he choose? Being a magician suffering from severe clinical depression, or medication to help him not want his life to end and not having magic?

“I don’t think so. Even if it’s treated you’ll still have all the years of living with it as pain to draw upon. Besides, you want to take the chance of going off your meds without professional help?”

“I guess it can’t hurt to see a psych doc that has magic.”

“You never know what the benefits are until you try. Like you said, it can’t hurt.” The two young men sat together in comfortable silence for several minutes.

“Hey El?”

“Yeah, Q?”

“Thanks for sharing,” Quentin said with a shy smile.

“Thanks for listening, Q. I’m glad you’re here.” Quentin gave Eliot a million watt smile at that. Eliot hoped they could build upon this foundation. He hoped Quentin would come to him if he needed him. 

* * *

QUELIOTQUELIOT

That evening Quentin and Julia were getting ready for the party in his room. Julia was grilling him for details about his conversation with Eliot. She was Quentin’s best friend and she wanted to make sure Eliot wasn’t going to break his heart.

“We just talked about his discovery of magic and finding his way to Brakebills.”

“Okay, but like, do you think he’s interested in a relationship with you, or does he just want to be friends? I’m getting the attraction vibe from him towards you,” she said.

“Yeah, me too, which is what I find so weird. I don’t pick up those things easily. He’s got to be overly obvious if I can tell he’s into me, right? So why is he being so obvious?”

“I don’t know, Q. Maybe because he’s really into you?” Julia asked with a laugh. Leave it to Quentin to try and find a problem where there wasn’t one. ‘Someone hot likes me, so what’s wrong with him?’ that’s the way Quentin thought.

“Or he’s seeing a ghost,” Quentin said softly, voicing his fear aloud. He was afraid that Eliot was only seeing the man he loved and lost, and not Quentin. He didn’t need to compete with a ghost, there would be no winning that fight.

“What do you mean?” Julia asked.

“Eliot told me that he recently lost a friend.”

“A ‘friend’? Or more than a friend?”

“I got the feeling it was more than a friend, but that the relationship never got the chance to develop before he died. He said I remind him of his friend.”

“Crap. That’s not good. It’s not healthy for either of you if he’s comparing you to a ghost! It’s not fair to either of you, or the one he lost, for that matter.”

“I know. I told him the same thing. But I don’t want to not give this a chance either. Is that a mistake?” he asked her, wanting her logical advice.

“I don’t know, Q. There’s no perfect answer to that. He may be ready, or he may need time. I would focus on being his friend first, let him get used to you and see you for you, not the one he lost.”

“Seems sensible. I guess I should just take it one day at a time and see where it goes.”

“That’s my advice. You ready to go to the party?”

Quentin examined his appearance in his mirror. He was sporting black jeans and his green button down shirt. He was freshly shaven and felt not confident but satisfied with his appearance. Julia was in a beautiful sapphire blue dress with a halter top with a skirt that came down to just above her knees. Her hair fell loosely around her face and her makeup was beautifully done. 

“I’m ready to go if you are.”

“Yeah, I’m all set,” Julia said. With that, they set out to the Physical Kids cottage.

* * *

PARTYPARTY

The first party of the year was never going to be their greatest party. It was a fairly basic party, for a physical kids party. There were drinks, mostly their signature cocktail. There were edibles, mostly prepared by Eliot. Music you could dance to, or not, played throughout the cottage. All in all it was your basic cottage party.

Perhaps that was the problem. Eliot had not been a resident of the cottage in three years. He hated to think he had outgrown it. He had been the king of the Physical Cottage if not Brakebills itself long before he became King of Fillory. No matter how he tried to brush it off, he just wasn’t fitting into the mold he fit into when he had last thrown a PK party.

He felt completely apathetic toward the goings on in the cottage. What in the multiverse did it even matter? Eliot didn’t like feeling so lost in what had once been his home, but there you were. 

Margo noticed his mood when she came to get a fresh drink. “Eliot, what’s with the long face? This is a party, have some fun.”

“I’m trying, Bambi. I just can’t seem to get into the party spirit.”

“Has it really been that long since you were at a decent party?”

“Yes, it really has. When the world needs you to constantly save it when you haven’t the first clue _how,_ kinda kills the mood, you know?”

“You’re supposed to be taking a break! Relax, grab yourself a drink, or five. Find yourself an attractive boy to bang and enjoy yourself.”

“I couldn’t-” the thought of sleeping with someone without Quentin was just too painful right now. And he didn’t want casual with Quentin, and no way was Q ready for them to jump into bed.

 _“Relax!_ Fuck, you’re ornery tonight. You need to just let your worries go and just drift, okay? If you don’t calm down from constant fight-or-flight alertness you’re gonna burn yourself out. You’re _already_ burned out. So cool your jets, let you tits down, and have some fun. Can you do that?”

“I’m trying, Bambi!” he cried in frustration. It wasn’t that easy, and he didn’t know why, and it was aggravating him.

“Do, or do not, there is no try,” came the voice of his favorite nerd from Margo’s right. Without either Margo or Eliot noticing, Quentin had approached and sat down next to Margo. Shit, when did he arrive? How much had he heard? 

“Our little Q has a point, El. Just relax and enjoy the party, alright?”

Easy for her to say she wasn’t torn between the memory of someone she loves and an alternate version of them from before your story took place. She wasn’t hiding massive secrets from someone she wanted an actual relationship with.

“I’ll work on it,” he said.

“Good. If you boys will excuse me, there’s a hot guy waiting to dance with me somewhere in this party,” she said, shooting them a flirty smile and sashaying away. 

“Sorry if I interrupted,” Quentin said shyly.

“Don’t worry about it, Q, she was just repeating the same thing she said earlier,” Eliot replied.

“Are you not enjoying yourself?” 

“Not like I usually do, no. I just can’t seem to relax tonight.”

“I know what you mean. I’m always a ball of nerves at parties. Or anywhere that requires social interaction. Not- not that you’re nervous or anything, I’m sure you’re quite suave at parties. It’s just that I can understand not relaxing since I never do- and would you please say something so I stop rambling?”

Eliot was smiling by the second sentence Quentin said. It was nice to hear him ramble on and on, the way he does when he’s nervous or excited. “I like hearing you ramble,” was all he said.

“You like listening to my nonsensical thoughts that come out of my mouth all jumbled up in no logical order?” Quentin asked with a disbelieving look. 

“Yes, I do. It's cute, Q.”

“How can nervous rambling be cute?”

“People ramble when they care about something so much that they can’t get all their thoughts out in an orderly fashion. Rambling reveals what you care about.”

“I thought it just revealed nervousness.”

“It does, but you wouldn’t be nervous if you didn’t care.”

“I never thought about it like that,” Quentin said, a dumbfounded look on his face.

“Does that help?”

“Yeah.”

“So have you been enjoying the party?”

“Yeah, as much as I ever enjoy a party. It helps that there is more than one person I already knew here to talk to.”

“Getting to know anyone new?” Eliot asked, slightly nervous of his answer. What if he met a girl here? He tried to push that thought aside. He had to stop being terrified that Quentin would leave him for a girl or they would never work as a couple. Why was he such a self sabotager?

“When I stayed close to Julia. She’s started conversations with a couple other physical kids, and now she’s chatting with someone called Will?”

“Probably Will Watts, he’s a naturalist that usually comes to our parties. Last I heard he was seeing Jen, who lives in the cottage. Was she chatting with a tall dude, pale skin, spiked hair with blonde tips?”

“That’s the guy. So is the whole campus here or is this party exclusive?”

“This is our opening party, the only ones allowed are returning students who’ve attended one of our parties before. That would be just about every second and third year.”

“What about first years?” Quentin asked with curiosity.

Eliot gave him a soft smile. “Only two were invited,” he said meaningfully. 

Quentin’s mouth opened in a silent “Oh” but no sounds made it out. Eliot could tell he was floored by the revelation that only himself and Julia had been invited to the ‘cool kids’ aka “physical kids” party. 

Eliot was finally relaxing with Quentin here. Margo was right. If Eliot had to relive the past hellish years he had to take some time to rest, recharge, and regroup. He had to calm down his alertness before he blew a fuse. With Quentin by his side he could do that. He could let go of his control and just let himself go.

Tonight he would enjoy getting to know his Quentin all over again, and let Quentin get to know him. Tomorrow’s problems could wait a few days. In the morning classes would resume and preparation would begin for fighting the beast. But tonight was for fun.

“Wanna dance, Q?” Eliot asked, deciding to be bold. Well, bold for Quentin, mild for his own normal.

“Together?” Quentin asked, nervously.

“Yeah. Dance with me, Q.”

“Okay,” Quentin took Eliot’s offered hand and the two headed out to the makeshift dance floor. 

Eliot held Quentin with one arm around his shoulders the other one lower towards his waist, keeping him close. Quentin shifted his arms, uncertain where to place them. Eliot finally took Quentin’s hands and placed them around his own waist.

“This okay?” he asked Quentin softly, not wanting to push things with him too soon.

“Yeah,” Quentin said, relaxing at the knowledge that Eliot wanted his arms around him. 

They swayed with the music more than danced to it. Eliot’s head resting on Quentin’s whether they looked into each other's eyes or held each other close like this was just a prolonged hug. For the first time in more than a year, Eliot felt at home. This was where he belonged, in Quentin's arms. He never wanted to be without him again. If he succeeded, he wouldn’t have to. If.

T.B.C. . . .


	6. Mirāburokku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot helps Quentin with a mental ward. It comes with some side effects. Quentin and Eliot bond further.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mirāburokku according to Google translate means “mirror block” in Englishized Japanese. 
> 
> I swear this is not what I set out to write by chapter 6 when I started this. I have no idea what happened. My story must have been hijacked. Or something.

**CHAPTER 6:** **Mirāburokku**

**Monday 8/31/2015**

The following day, Monday, was the first day of the new semester and they now had classes to attend. After classes Eliot tracked Quentin down in the library. Quentin had found a corner table next to one of the south-facing windows and was seated with an open book on the table in front of him. 

It really hadn’t taken much thought to determine where to find him. Quentin was a nerd, of course he was at the library. Eliot had finally found the book on psychic wards earlier and was ready to make good on his promise to help Quentin deal with Penny.

“Hey, Q,” Eliot said, glad that he could call him by the nickname. The monster hadn’t used it much, usually calling him a disjointed "Quen-tin". When Eliot used his full name it still reminded him of all the times the monster had said it, and he hated reminders.

“Eliot, hi,” Quentin greeted him with a big smile.

“How were your first classes?” Eliot asked, taking the seat next to Quentin. 

“Um…” said Quentin, not sure how to answer the question.

“It's okay to say boring. Unfortunately, until you get the basic Poppers down there is not much you can actually do, magically speaking.”

“Yeah, that’s what the professors all said, too,” Quentin said with a pout. Eliot suppressed the urge to kiss the adorable pout away.

“And you don’t want to believe that you won’t get to do any magic for weeks,” Eliot said knowingly. He had been there himself back in his first year after all. 

“Well, yeah. I want to see results. I finally have magic, something I always wanted in my life, and now some professors are telling me I have to wait to perform any magic myself? I don’t want to wait, I want to master it now-”

“Whoa, Q, slow down. I hate to break it to you, but the professors aren't wrong. Spell casting- deliberate magic- isn’t something you pick up overnight. It takes lots of practice to get the movements down. The more you practice, the better your magic will be and the faster you can start casting.”

“I know. I get that it takes work. I just- I just wish it didn’t take so much time.”

“Well, I am available if you need someone to help you practice. And I found that book with the psychic wards, to protect you from your psychic roomy.”

“I thought I couldn't do magic yet.”

“You can’t. Lucky for you, I can. There aren’t many wards that can be applied second-hand, but there are some. They take a lot of trust to apply though, so I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to-”

“I trust you,” Quentin said, interrupting him.

“Are you sure? The wards won’t stick if the castee doesn’t completely trust the caster. I’m basically applying a lock to your mind, and while I’m placing it some thoughts might leak through, even though I’m not personally a psychic, I might see what’s inside your head. And the wards will need to be replaced frequently. A psychic friend once told me that for those with depression, or similar issues, the wards need to be reapplied more often as their own mind is tearing down the wards all the time.”

Quentin said nothing for a few minutes and Eliot let him think. This kind of magic required a bond of intimate trust. It was recommended only the closest of friends and family do the spell. It was specifically not recommended for romantic partners without a long term stable relationship already established. But it was the only option Eliot had, and he wanted to try. Quentin didn’t need Penny’s shitting on his thoughts. He had enough self-doubt on his own, he didn’t need more.

“I trust you,” Quentin finally repeated. “I’m not sure why, but it's like we’re…” he didn’t finish the sentence, his nerves sealed his mouth shut. He didn’t want to spoil things by being too forward or too needy so soon.

“We’re connected,” Eliot finished for him. He hadn’t realized that this Quentin already felt it. Eliot thought the connection was just a hold over from his love for Quentin 40, but maybe there was more to it. Fogg and Jane had both told him that the two of them had always been close friends bordering on more or intimate lovers in all 40 timelines. Maybe they both felt this connection in many or all of those other timelines.

Quentin looked him in the eyes at his words. There was so much emotion in those two chocolate brown orbs. Eliot offered a tentative smile and Quentin returned it. 

“Yeah, connected,” Quentin said.

“Okay, meet me at the physical cottage at 8 o’clock. I’ll apply the wards in the privacy of my room. Then if you're up for it, we can study.”

“But you’re a year ahead of me, you must have your own work to do,” Quentin protested. 

“Let me worry about that. I’m actually ahead of the class right now, and I want to help you.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

“Okay.” 

“Good. Now show me what you’re working on,” Eliot said. 

They spent the next few hours going through the first ten Poppers. Eliot was a better, more patient tutor than any of the professors. Within an hour, Quentin was doing them all perfectly. Within two hours, he had just about mastered the first 20. Eliot told Quentin that the next step after mastering all 340 Poppers was putting them together. After he mastered that, there were the tuts for all the other basic magics he had to memorize. But by the time he had Poppers down, he would be able to cast some magic, including the mental wards Eliot had looked up for him.

Quentin didn’t know why Eliot wanted to help him so much, but he was touched that he did. He was comforted to know that the connection between them was going both ways. He wasn’t sure why he felt so connected to the older man, but nothing in his life ever felt so _right_. 

Maybe someday he would even talk to Eliot about the dreams he'd been having. For the past three days Quentin kept dreaming of the two of them at the small shack of a house with the square puzzle outside. Sometimes there was a woman with them, sometimes there was a young boy. Eliot was in every dream. Quentin didn’t have any idea what it meant but he knew it was important. Somehow.

* * *

LATER THAT NIGHT

Eliot checked to make sure everything was ready to perform the psychic ward on Quentin. He had the Zeta crystal, the Gretta candles, the book, and the herbs. It was probably the sixth time he had gone over everything. He was nervous. What the hell? Eliot Waugh did _not_ get nervous. 

Who was he kidding, of course he was nervous, this was about Quentin. Quentin wasn’t just anyone, he was _important_. He couldn’t fuck this up. He couldn’t. Performing this ward on Quentin was a definite risk. Opening both of them up to such a mental connection could very easily have unforeseen consequences. 

The thing was, he kept thinking back to his Quentin’s first year and all the grief Penny had given him. Quentin had many internal voices that were very good at tearing all his self confidence down. With Penny’s psychic abilities he could hear that too, somewhat, and yet it always made him angry with Quentin. He always behaved like it was Quentin’s fault he had depression. Eliot couldn’t stand by and allow it to happen again. Not if he could do something about it. 

Was this really necessary? No, probably not. Penny had actually come to care about Quentin in his own assholeish way. Yet, Eliot still wanted to help. Whatever the consequences, he would deal with them.

Finally he went downstairs to wait for Quentin to arrive. The downstairs of the cottage was pretty empty of people tonight. This early in the night most were probably hanging out in the common areas of campus. Margo was out on the patio practicing her meditation or her fighting magic. Eliot made himself comfortable on the couch, just waiting for Quentin.

A few minutes later there came a tentative knock at the front door. Eliot was swift to answer it. He didn’t care if it might look to someone else that he was eager or needy. He loved Q and damn anyone who thought less of him for it. As expected, Quentin waited nervously on the other side of the door. Eliot gave him a welcoming smile and ushered him inside.

“Hey, Q. Come on in. You don’t have to knock, you know. You are welcome to enter anytime.”

“Can you do that? Don’t other people live here?”

“Oh, Q, I am _king_ of this cottage,” he said to Quentin in his most regal High King voice. “What I say goes.”

“Yeah, I can see that. Still, don’t you guys lock the door or something?”

“Nope. At least not in with locks and keys like you might be thinking of. We do occasionally lock it with magic, but any physical kid can unlock it. I’ll show you how, if you want. Or, you can just knock on the rare occasion it is locked and just enter the rest of the time.”

“Okay, if you’re sure I’m welcome.”

“I rule here, Q. If I say you’re welcome here others will not dare disagree. They know better.”

“Alright! I get you,” Quentin laughed.

“Good. Now do you want anything to eat or drink before we go upstairs?” Eliot asked, ever the good host. It was one of the few skills he had still retained from his Brakebills persona while he was High King of Fillory.

“No, thanks,” Quentin said.

“Okay then, follow me. I’ve already set up in my room.”

“Right, going in your room, no big deal,” Quentin said clearly nervous that it was, in fact, a big deal.

“Hey, it’s just me. I’m here in whatever way you need me right now, okay? Right now, we are just going to cast a mental ward on your mind.”

“Right, which might leak some of my innermost personal thoughts to you. No reason to feel exposed,” Quentin said sarcastically.

“You don’t have to hide from me, Q. I’m not so scary,” Eliot said, entering his room and shutting the door behind Quentin. Quentin stood a bit uncertainly just inside the door. Eliot moved to sit on his bed while he tried to calm Quentin down.

Quentin scoffed at him. “Of course you’re not scary to yourself.”

“Q, you said we’re connected, right. You feel this connection of something deep between us?”

“Yes.”

“Then trust that it will still be there. I know we just met and you barely know me, and this bit of magic is a bit intimate for that. But I really care about you, and I want you to be able to trust that. 

“But if you’re not ready to try something so intimate with me, that’s okay, Q. I’m not trying to push you. It’s your choice.”

Quentin just stared at him for a long moment as he studied Eliot and thought over his options. Finally he sighed and sat down on the bed facing Eliot. “I said I trust you, El, and I do. I just don’t want you to be spooked by my broken brain. It tends to scare off people who only have to deal with it externally. You’ll be getting the internal view, I don’t want to lose you. As- As- As a friend- I mean.” 

Eliot felt a bit of thrill at hearing Quentin call him El. It was so good to see Quentin becoming comfortable with him, at least in one sense. He had forgotten how scared Quentin had been of letting people know more about his depression. He’d had the knowledge for so long, he forgot how much it had taken for Quentin to give him that. 

“Maybe we should talk a bit about that first, would that help?” he suggested.

“I don’t know how to talk about it. My thoughts barely make sense to me, trying to explain them to anyone else is nearly impossible.”

“Remember, Q, magic comes from pain. Everyone here has some sort of tragic past, everyone. Whether it's parents who were crappy, or parents who died tragically. Clinical depression or emotional repression. I had a friend who got magic after her best friend died. She was so pissed that her magic came at the cost of her friend's life.”

“Are you trying to tell me it gets better?” Eliot smiled at the familiar words. The circumstances of this conversation might be different but the context was similar.

“God, no. It doesn’t get better. What I am telling you is that you are not alone here, Q.”

“What about you? What pain gave you magic?” asked Quentin, wanting to shift the focus off him, however temporarily.

“It's a long story, Q,” he said, not sure if he wanted to get into his entire history just yet.

“I want to hear it,” Quentin said empathically. 

Because it was Quentin asking, Eliot told him the story. He told him more than he had told Quentin at this point in timeline 40- but he had opened up more about his childhood during the mosaic. He felt no need to hold back any more when it came to Quentin Coldwater.

“I grew up in small town full of homophobic xenophobic people. Not the best place for a queer adolescent boy to be. I was an easy target for this- this bully. One day I’m walking down the street eating a candy bar- by that time I was already eating my problems on a professional level. When I saw him crossing over, coming over to give me a beating.

“There was this bus coming. I barely thought the thought. I knew instantly what I had done, that it was me. My nose started bleeding. Logan Kinear died instantly and I ruined my favorite button-down. That is how I learned at the age of fourteen that I was telekinetic.”

“God. That’s awful.”

“So you see, you aren’t the only one in the room with dark thoughts. You won’t scare me.”

Quentin sat quietly for a moment, deep in thought. When he began speaking, Eliot knew how vulnerable he was feeling. “I told you I suffer from depression, or at least I implied it. My brain- it’s not a nice place to be. Before I got here I was in the hospital- a psychiatric hospital. Sometimes I feel like life is never gonna be anything but pointless and empty s-so- so why go on.”

Eliot was pleased that Quentin had shared this with him. Before he could comment Quentin continued. “I just wanted you to know that before you so willingly expose yourself to my leaking thoughts.”

“I’ve been there, Q. I’ve had times where I tried to drink myself to an early grave- the earlier the better. So it’s not gonna scare me off. You ready to try this?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Then let’s get started. You sit here in this circle,” Eliot said pointing out the circle he had drawn on his floor earlier. “You’ll need to drink this tea, the herbs will help lower your natural shields to allow me in to place the additional ward. The effect is temporary.”

“This seems a bit involved, is it going to require much reset?”

“Yes, but it won’t be as involved to redo the wards. The recasting will be much simpler, but it takes more to set it up the first time. Think of it like setting up an internet account. The first time takes a lot of setting up that you don’t have to redo to login in the future.”

“That actually makes sense. You should teach someday, El. You have a good way of making tough abstract concepts tangible and understandable.”

“Thanks, I hadn’t thought of that.” Eliot placed the crystals in the position needed around the circle. He placed the last crystal on top of Quentin’s head. He then took his spot and performed the tuts the spell needed. 

After he completed the last tut, Eliot felt a calm wave of magic pulse between him and Quentin. He felt the outer shell of Quentin’s mind come down to allow Eliot entrance. As it did, he saw flashes of memory. _A young boy sitting alone on the playground when a young girl comes over to introduce herself. The two young kids lay drawing a map of Fillory underneath a table. A teenage Quentin swallowing a bottle of pills, more than twenty pills went down his throat. He saw Quentin making a castle out of playing cards in what was likely his entrance exam to Brakebills._

More memories flew through his mind. _Eliot being crowned High King Eliot the Spectacular by Quentin. Quentin crying over Alice going Niffin, while Eliot tries to hold him back and comfort him at the same time. Quentin kissing him on their one year anniversary at the mosaic. The day Teddy was born. Eliot and Quentin’s wedding. Teddy’s son learning magic card tricks from granddad Quentin while Grandpa El watched. Eliot rejecting Quentin in the throne room. Waking up to Margo telling him that Quentin had died. Performing the Merken Ziet Ritual._

Finally the memories stopped. It had felt like forever, but Eliot knew that barely a few seconds had passed in real time. Memory-time or mental time goes much faster than real-time. Eliot finished the next tuts which put up a mirror wall around Quentin’s mind. This would keep psychics from readily picking up Quentin’s random thoughts. With a final Popper 21 he was done. 

Eliot took a breath. “Quentin. It’s finished. You can remove the Zeta crystal from your head. How do you feel?”

It took Quentin a minute to respond. He looked a bit dazed as he removed the crystal from his head and placed it absently next to him. “El, did you see all that? My memories?”

“I saw some, yes. I think I saw the day you met Julia, and one where you two were drawing a map of Fillory under a table.”

“I saw those, too. But I saw ones I didn’t recognize, too,” Quentin said. Eliot's blood went cold at his words. Had Quentin seen Eliot’s memories of timeline 40? Eliot didn’t know if he wanted it to be true, or wanted it to not be true.

“What did you see, Q? Tell me,” he asked desperately, needing to know in either case.

Quentin took a moment to put what he had seen into words. It had all come so fast. “I saw a lifetime, I think. I- I- I think I saw us getting married…”

So it was true. The memories had gone _both_ ways. Eliot had seen some of Quentin’s most important memories to date. And Quentin had seen the most significant of Eliot’s memories of Quentin 40 and himself (or Eliot 40). Looks like the truth was going to be revealed sooner than he intended. Maybe that was a good thing, or not, but he didn’t have a choice now, he had to tell Q. 

“The spell allowed some of our memories to go from one mind to the other. You were seeing some of the most important events in my life,” Eliot whispered. He didn’t want to scare Q off by revealing that he had future memories of a life together with Quentin. He wasn’t ready to lose him. He was so scared that this would make Q feel pressured and consequently, make him withdraw altogether.

“How? What-” came Quentin’s confused voice.

“Come, let's make ourselves comfortable. This is going to be a long story.” Reaching a hand down, Eliot pulled the other man up on his feet and over to the bed. He ignored the mess of magic supplies on the floor, but did do a tut to extinguish the lit candles, the rest could be tomorrow’s problem. Eliot then sat down, his back against his head board with Quentin facing him. 

“I need to tell you… but I don’t want to lose you, Q. You mean so much to me, I can't lose you. I can’t…” The fear he felt at the thought of Quentin running, like Eliot had that day of Bambi’s wedding, was driving him into a bit of a panic.

“Hey, no, Eliot, no. You won’t lose me. We’re friends, right? Connected. Calm down, I’m right here.” Quentin instinctively pulled the other man into a hug, needing to comfort him.

It took Eliot a few minutes to regather himself. He had to tell him, things between the two men would never work out if Eliot kept this a secret. It would rip them apart from the inside out. He knew that. It didn’t make revealing this any easier. 

“This is going to sound a little crazy, Q,” Eliot began when he finally calmed a bit.

“Crazier than discovering that magic really is real? Crazier than meeting a guy and feeling an instant, deep, and intimate connection with him? Come on, Eliot. My world was turned upside down a few days ago. It can’t get much crazier.”

“You’d be surprised. Okay, well, the memories you saw, they were my memories.”

“But, I was in them. I don’t remember them,” Quentin said. 

“Yeah, you were, kind of. You were in my memories because they took place in the future.”

“Future? Time travel is a real thing?”

“A branch of magic called Horomancy. But this was different. I went to a friend who had this thing that could turn back time, create new timelines when she did it. She had put us in a timeloop and we were living in the fortieth timeline. I’ll get back to that. Something horrible happened that I had to fix, and this was the best I could get. I asked her to send my memories back to just before you came to Brakebills. She did and so that makes this timeline 41. The memories you saw were before I went to my friend.”

Quentin took a few minutes to process that before he responded. Eliot just waited him out, letting him digest it. “Did I see us… get married?” Quentin asked hesitantly. 

“Yeah. We were on this quest to find a key, and ended up with a puzzle to solve. We spent fifty years trying to solve it. During that time we were together. Time hijinks undid it, I guess, but we remembered.”

“Tell me about it, tell me about _us_ ,” Quentin requested.

“Are you sure you want to know? Those events haven’t happened to you yet, and I didn’t want the history of timeline 40 to dictate how you behave or feel towards me. I may have Eliot 40’s memories, but I’m not really him even if I feel like I am.”

“What do you mean?”

“Once they completed the magic that sent me his memories, all of them, Julia, Margo, even Eliot 40 will have to continue in that timeline. I know what happened until then, and I know what happened in timeline 40’s future (relative to now). But that doesn't mean it will happen _this_ time. And I don’t want you to feel obligated to me because of what we were in another lifetime!”

“Eliot, just because you tell me we were Romeo & Juliet or whatever the fuck we were that you remember it doesn’t mean I’m gonna feel squat. Either I like the man you are now, or I don’t. I hate to break it to you but no great epic lovers tale is going to alter that, unless we _feel_ it. 

“I feel connected to you now, but that was there from the moment I saw you, before we even spoke a word. Is that an echo of whatever you had with Quentin 40? I won’t lie to you, El, I honestly don’t know. Even if that is, so what? I still feel it. But whether that becomes more or not is up to you and me and how we feel right here, right now, okay?”

Eliot thought about it for a long moment. This was why he had wanted to wait to tell Quentin that he had future memories. He wanted Quentin and him to already be friends before he told him about the future of timeline 40 where he loved Quentin and was loved by him in return. But the secret was already out now. Luckily, it sounded as if Quentin might already feel something for him, even if it was new.

So Eliot started his story. He started with the early days at Brakebills. He told him how they met and how much Eliot was attracted to him right from the start. But fearing he wasn’t queer enough, Eliot had not pursued, and the two had become best friends bordering on more. He told Quentin about the drunken threesome. He related what Quentin had told him about realizing he loved Eliot when the two had been separated and trapped without any way to get back to the other. He told him about being on a mission together without the rest of their group of friends and how the mission had lasted fifty years.

He told him everything he could about their fifty years at the mosaic. Eliot told Quentin about falling in love together, but each still being an emotional train wreck. Of them meeting Arielle and how Quentin had married her (since Eliot was still emotionally closed off at that time). How she gave birth to Teddy and died a few years later. How Eliot and Quentin had made a new dynamic without her and eventually they got married and raised Teddy together. He told Q about Teddy’s wife Kara, and their three kids, Arielle, Quel, and Rupert. 

Eliot talked about growing old together with Quentin. Talked about his body breaking down. How he had died in his chair, leaving Quentin alone. He told Quentin about sitting in the throne room after Margo prevented them from having to go on the mosaic quest. How they remembered fifty years of love all at once. He didn’t hide the truth from Q, he told him how Quentin had put his heart on the line and Eliot had been too scared to take it and had crushed it instead. 

By the end of the tale silent tears were running down the man's face. Q was the only friend he could cry with, and the pain was too much. Eliot told Quentin about finally realizing he had made a monumental mistake that day, but it was too late to fix it. 

“What do you mean, too late?” Quentin asked, interrupting him.

“I was possessed at that time, by a powerful monster. It- it liked you. It would demand your attention, your help to do whatever evil whim he had that moment. It was a bit child-like but with the power to kill you with a thought. And you were stuck with him for _months_ , while it wore my body, the body of someone you loved deeply. 

“By the time you and Margo got me out, you were spiraling- had been for weeks, I think.” He didn’t tell him about how his friends had not noticed he, the heart of their group, had needed help. How mad Eliot was that they hadn’t helped Q, how guilty he felt because they had been helping him instead of Quentin. Quentin didn’t need that on his shoulders, didn’t need the added resentment.

“Oh. How bad did I get?” asked Q, fearing he knew the answer. Quentin spiraling for weeks could not result in anything good. Stupid broken brain.

“When I woke up, you- you- you were _gone_.” Eliot was crying openly now, the loss still feeling as deep and fresh as it did when he first heard. Acting on instinct, Quentin pulled Eliot into his arms, holding him through the storm of tears. Eliot cried for a long time, clinging to Quentin. He hasn't allowed himself to cry much since Q’s death. Crying wasn’t something he did, but this pain was simply too deep to contain.

“I’m sorry, El. I’m so sorry. I’m here, I’ve got you,” Quentin whispered whatever words he could think of to comfort this beautiful man who had lost his spouse to fear. His own fear of loving him, and Quentin’s fear of living. The two of them sat there, on Eliot’s bed, wrapped in each other's arms for a long time. 

“I never got to speak to him again. They hit me with an ax to depossess me, whisked me off to the infirmary for healing, and Quentin went to drop the son of bitch in a hole. Some fucker showed up wanting the monster so he could become a god. He broke the mirror that led to the seam they were gonna dispose of the monster in. He- he had recently learned his discipline was mending, so he fixed it. You can’t cast magic there. It caused a backlash, the magic killed him- as he _knew_ it would. 

“I never even got the chance to talk to him again. To tell him how sorry I was. Tell him that I love him.”

“That’s what you wanted to undo, isn’t it? Your Quentin’s death.”

“I couldn’t leave it at that. I couldn’t. He deserved to know, to know how much I love him. No other magic would let me tell him. I looked, I looked for months!”

“El, I know you’re hurting right now, I don’t want to make it worse, but… you have to know I’m not… I’m not-”

“I know. I know you’re not the same man, not exactly. You don’t have that shared history we had. I’ve met other timeline versions of our friends. So I _know_. You’re similar but not the same. But I’m not exactly the man who lived that life either.”

“Eliot. I’m not trying to shut you down here. I just want you to understand, we have to make our own memories, you know?”

“Yeah. Our own story, Q. I can do that.”

“Good. I can do that, too. We’ll take Julia’s advice on this one,” Quentin said.

“Julia’s advice?”

“When I told her you called the tour you offered me a _date_. She said go be there, be his friend, see if it becomes more. We both need time with this,” he moved his hand to indicate the two of them.

“Yeah, I know. I need time to process, and I need time to get to know who I am now after all that’s happened to me. Then I can get to know who you are in this timeline.”

“Exactly, Eliot. I know it sucks a bit, but we’ll last longer for it, whatever we become, if we just take it slow. Let's focus on being friends first.”

“I hate being a grown-up.”

“Who said anything about being a grown up?” Quentin asked with a laugh. It sounded so carefree. “Don’t think of it like that. Think of it like an extended bachelor period. A time to get your last hurrahs in before you possibly settle down with a stable relationship. Whatever kind of hurrahs you want to do.”

“Not the kind I might have done four years ago, I can promise you that. I couldn’t do casual sex again. I couldn’t, feels too much like I’m betraying-”

“So don’t. Go to wild parties, meet and flirt with cute guys, and then blow them off-”

“Didn’t I just say ‘No’ to the casual sex? So blowing them-” Eliot butt in with a sexy smirk.

“I mean ditch them, idiot,” Quentin responded with an eye roll. “Or climb Mt. Everest or something. Do something new.”

“Why climb Everest when you can just portal there?”

“Portal?”

“Like it sounds, a magic doorway from one place to another.”

“Nice! See, you have no excuse not to go to Everest if you want!” Eliot laughed. For the first time since waking up in Brakebills infirmary and hearing Quentin had died, Eliot laughed. It felt so good to joke with Quentin. He was right, neither of them were who Eliot remembers. They both needed time to come to grips with that. 

“Thanks, Quentin. That really helps. So, um, you believe me, about the future memories, stuff?”

“Kinda hard not to, what with me still able to picture being the groom in the wedding I haven’t been to yet. I trust you Eliot. Even if what you're telling me is a little unbelievable. Every instinct I possess tells me you’re not crazy, and this is true. Also, I think I’ve been dreaming about the lifetime you lived.”

“What do you mean?”

“The memory where your Quentin kissed you in the candlelight on the quilt? I’m pretty sure I dreamed about that a few nights ago.”

“Our first kiss during that timeline. I dreamed of it the other night, myself. Any others?”

“A few. All taking place in the same location.”

“Are we sharing dreams? How the fuck did that happen?” Eliot asked of no one.

“We can solve that mystery another day. But it reinforced this connection between us. How could I not believe you?”

“I’m glad you believe me. I don’t want to think about what the consequences would have been if you or Margo thought I was nuts.”

“Margo knows?”

“She and I are too close for her not to have noticed the differences in my behavior after I got the memories. And she’s not one to let something like that go unquestioned. So I told her first. I was gonna tell you next anyway, but then you saw my memories.”

“When were you gonna tell me?”

“In a week or so. There’s a thing happening in a few weeks, I wanted to tell you before then, but after you got to know me and our friendship started developing.”

“Makes sense I guess. What happens?”

“No, not now, Q. It’s late, and it's a very long story. Tomorrow, after classes, I can fill you and Julia in on more of timeline 40- actual events this time. I’m not ready to get into it now, okay?”

“That’s fair. I mean I totally want to know all about it, but you’re right, it’s after one am and I still have class in the morning.”

“Shit. I am too sober to be up so late.”

“Yeah. I guess I should let you sleep,” Quentin said somewhat awkwardly.

“I don’t want you wandering around campus after hours as untrained in magic as you are right now. Please, stay here at the cottage.”

“Sure, I’m too tired to find my room anyway. So what, I camp on the couch?”

“Don’t be silly. There are plenty of spare rooms, you can have one of those if you want. Or…”

“OR?”

“I mean if you want you can just stay in here, to sleep. If you want, you don’t have to.” Good grief, when did Eliot become such an uncertain awkward dick? Oh, that’s right. The day he realized he loved Quentin Coldwater.

“I’m a cuddler,” Quentin warned.

“I know,” Eliot said with a smirk. 

“Scootch over then.” Quentin agreed before he could overthink it and talk himself out of it. Something told Quentin that they wouldn’t take long before tossing out the we-need-space rule they had just talked about. He’d worry about that in the morning. 

Eliot climbed off the bed and was changing into his pjs. Quentin removed his shoes, and was debating what else he could do to make himself more comfortable when a pair of pj pants hit his face.

“You can sleep in those. Jeans are not the most forgiving fabric when trying to sleep.” Eliot said, shooting him a smile.

“Thanks. Think they’ll fit?” Quentin asked. It was a fair question, Eliot was very slim and Quentin was a bit more filled out around the waist.

“That’s my baggy pair. Should fit okay for you.” He knew they fit Quentin well. His Q had stolen the pair at some point since they fit him so well. Eliot didn’t mind, that was just the kind of friendship they had back then- the kind that made you think they were lovers.

Without further hold up both men were in sleepwear and ready to settle into bed. Eliot climbed in a lay down on his side facing the center of the double bed. Quentin climbed in from the other side and faced away from Eliot. He was laying on the edge, tense from nerves. 

“Q, either relax and get over here, or go find an empty bed. You’ll never sleep if you’re so tense.”

“I didn’t want to crowd you,” Quentin mumbled.

“Well, you won’t. Now come here.”

With that last reassurance Quentin gave in and scooted back so his back was to Eliot’s chest. Eliot wrapped an arm around his waist. “This okay?” He asked, not wanting to push him. He felt Quentin nod and his body lost it’s tension at the touch. “Night, Q.”

“Night, El.” Both men slept peacefully that night, the closeness of the other calming both of their minds into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

QUELIOT

That night Quentin dreamed of a young man marrying a young golden-brown haired woman. The young man was excited and nervous at the same time, and somehow he found comfort in the words Quentin said, not that Quentin knew what he’d said. Another man entered the room, with long hair neatly styled into a bun at the nape of his neck. It was an older Eliot, who came over and wrapped both Quentin and the younger man- Teddy his mind supplied- into a warm embrace, kissing both on the crown of their heads. 

When Quentin woke up, Eliot was already sitting up, a wistful look on his face. Blinking the sleepy haze from his brain as best he could, Quentin sat up.

“What were you dreaming of?” Eliot asked him.

“Um… a wedding, I think. Not mine, I was much older than that, in the dream. No it was, um, a young man, dark hair and green eyes, wearing gray formal-ish clothing. He married a young woman with golden brown hair and hazel eyes.”

“Sounds like you were sharing my dream again, Q. That sounds like Teddy and Kara’s wedding. That was such a bittersweet day.”

“Yeah, it seemed like it. How old was Teddy?”

“Um, twenty, maybe twenty one. He’d only left home two winters before, and that was not long after his eighteenth birthday.”

“He seemed to find what I- I mean what your Quentin said comforting.”

“Oh, he did. Ted and Q were always close, all of us were, really. But when he wanted to be cheered up Ted always went to Q. He- you- he was such a good father.”

“It looked like you were, too.”

“I like to think so. I was so freaked out when I found out Ari was pregnant. My parents, not the best role models, you know? Q told me that made the perfect model to follow- as long as I did the exact opposite of what my parents would do. It seemed to work pretty well.”

“Bad home life?”

“I told you I grew up in xenophobic, homophobic, racist town. My parents were the biggest bigots- and I was stuck under the same roof with them.”

“Not anymore, Eliot,” Quentin said, feeling sympathy for Eliot that home was such a bad place for him as a kid. 

Quentin had a good bond with his dad, but especially after the divorce his mom never understood him- or even wanted to understand her depressed son. So he kinda understood where Eliot was coming from, but not completely. He’d at least had safe harbor growing up. 

“Enough about my history. We have to bring the rest in and prepare for the beast,” Eliot said, done with deep talks about his past. He could only handle being vulnerable in minute amounts, even with Q. He used up his weekly allotment last night.

Eliot glanced at the clock, it was only 7:30 am. They still had an hour before class. Quentin followed his eyes, seeing the time as well. 

“Well, as much as I wanna spend hours talking about what happened last night, we’ve still got class. If I go now, I should have enough time to shower and change before first class.” Quentin got up from the bed and started to change out of his borrowed pj pants and back into his jeans.

“Yeah. Meet me back here at three, after your last class lets out. Bring Julia, and I can bring the two of you up to speed with the history of things to come.”

“Three o’clock, we’ll be here, even if I have to drag her here by force.”

“Why would-”

“She’ll crack open her books as soon as she can,” Quentin said as he pulled on his sneakers.

“Right, Knowledge student. I think Fogg mentioned that at some point.”

“She’s gonna be a Knowledge kid? Yeah, actually, that makes perfect sense.”

“Go, we’ll talk more after classes are over.”

“Okay, I’m going. See you later, Eliot,” Quentin said, giving the man a pat on his back as he made for the door. Eliot quickly pulled him into a brief hug, which Quentin returned. 

With that, Quentin left Eliot and quickly walked to the first year dorm. He quickly climbed up the stairs to his room on the second floor. He entered the room warily, waiting to see if Penny was there. 

Penny was there, clearly just getting out of the shower himself. Penny shot him a calculating look. “Where the fuck were you all night? No way a nerd like you got laid this fast.”

“Well then I’ll leave that up to your imagination as to where I was and what I was doing,” Quentin said, not putting up with this asshole’s intimidation tactics. If he could tell his dark thoughts to piss off, he could tell this dick the same thing.

Penny gave him a funny look, then his eyebrows shot up in surprise. “What the hell did you do? Your mind’s more leaky than a rusty bucket, but I’m not picking up squat right now.”

“Good. Stay out of my head.”

“You telling me a mediocre scrap like you was able to find a spell to block me so fast?”

“What does it matter? You won’t have to put up with my leaky brain for a while. Enjoy it, dipshit.”

“Fine, whatever, man. Like I care.”

“Good, then _act_ like you don’t care!” Quentin said, and Penny left before he could say another word. 

Quentin grabbed some fresh clothes and his shower bag and headed to the shower. He enjoyed a long shower while he thought about what Eliot had told him last night. He wasn’t sure what he felt about the fact that the man had memories of a lifetime living with and loving some alternate universe version of himself. He knew Eliot needed time to get to know him all over again, so he was still confident in what he had told Eliot last night. They would start their friendship fresh and see where it took them. He certainly wasn't against it turning into more eventually, but he wanted to be confident that Eliot saw him and not the Quentin he lost.

Quentin got out of the shower and combed his hair. He dressed in jeans and a red short sleeve polo shirt. As he left the bathroom he grabbed a gray sweater, some of the professors kept their rooms pretty chilly. He picked up his messenger bag and headed out to the food hall to find some breakfast. Julia was still eating a bowl of fruit and yogurt and waved him over. He placed his tray down on the table and sat across from her. 

“Hey, Jules,” he said, taking a bite of his omelette.

“Morning, Q. How did the anti-psychic spell go last night?”

“It seems to be working, Penny couldn't read me this morning.”

“That’s great, Q. Are there some wards you can do yourself?” Julia asked, taking a bite of pineapple.

“Eliot recommended I wait till I have more spellwork under my belt. Messing up a metal ward could have very, _very_ bad consequences.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s probably best. How long will the ward Eliot cast last?”

“Eliot suggested for this first time I wait till Penny is picking up my thoughts again so we know how long it will truly last before it wears off. He thinks it will probably take about two days. Normally, it would last 5 to 7 days, but apparently depression naturally breaks down mental protections like this mirror ward.”

“Really? I guess that's good that he knows that, so you can redo them- wait. Eliot knows about your depression?” Julia said with disbelief, dropping her utensil on the table. Quentin normally kept that a tightly guarded secret, so he couldn’t blame her for her surprise. 

“The spell creates a link between the caster and the subject. I couldn’t let him do that without warning him…”

“Oh, Right. Okay, yeah, I get that.”

“Jules, the spell had another side effect…”

“What? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, no, no, no. No, I’m fine. It just turned out to be a two-way link. Some of his most important memories leaked to me. He needs to talk to us about some of what I saw last night. So both of us are gonna meet him at the cottage after class.”

“What’s it about, Q? We need to study.”

“I can’t tell you here. We’ll talk more after class.”

“Alright, but this better be about more than just the boys he’s fucked. I don’t need his whole sexual history taking me away from my studies.”

“I promise, Jules. This is much more important than that.”

With that settled they changed the topic to what they had covered in class so far and how much they were struggling with the Poppers. From there they talked about how they felt the professors were doing, what subject they were covering in class. Then they talked a little about the campus and magic in general. Quentin took a minute to appreciate how great it was to share this new life of magic with his best friend.

T.B.C. . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I haven't had much time to write I have changed to updating every other week. Sorry for the delay, but I want to stretch out what is complete until I have more written.


	7. Telling Julia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot tells his closest friends the details of the fight with the beast in timeline 40.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is so much later than I planned.  
> I have some bad news for you: I'm back to work. Don't fret too much as I only work part-time. I'm trying to get back to writing, I've had a nasty case of writer's block. I'm working on it.  
> Due to all this I'm not sure when then next update will be. I want to get something new written before I post again. 
> 
> If you're bored waiting on me, I HIGHLY suggest reading PanBoleyn's Between the Sand and the Stone series. Start with "If I could fall into the sky". It takes a detour in the Mirror World in 4x13. Much better ending!

**CHAPTER 7: Telling Julia**

**Tuesday 9/1/2015**

* * *

Eliot watched Quentin exit his room before he got up from the bed and cleaned up the supplies from last night’s spell. He gathered the crystals up and placed them back in the bag, they would be needed when he went to recast the spell. The rest was cleaned up with a few simple tuts vanishing the chalk circle and spilled herbs. 

With his room now clean, he finally jumped in the shower to clean himself. Before he was done, Margo entered his room. “Eliot! Are you _still_ in the shower? What’s taking you so long today?” she asked with a teasing note to her voice.

“You saw Quentin leaving my room, didn’t you?” Eliot asked, completely unperturbed. He knew Margo well enough to tell when she knew more than she said. Her tone of voice said _‘I know you weren't alone last night!’_. He honestly didn’t care if she knew or not, even though there were not any juicy details to share today.

“Yup. He was wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday, too. Did you get laid last night, honey?”

“No. It’s too soon for Quentin. But we were casting a mental ward spell late last night and I didn’t want him walking across campus alone at night so I told him to sleep here.”

“Here in the cottage, or here in your room?” She asked with a suggestive lilt still in her voice.

“I told him either. He chose to stay here in my room.” Eliot responded, not taking the bait. He didn’t mind talking about the boys he was sleeping with, especially not with Margo, even when it became Quentin. But he had nothing to tell right now, and honestly he was fine with that too, for now at least.

“Ohhh. Lucky you. Still, you are not letting him cross campus at night? That’s a bit overprotective, isn’t it?”

“Not when he was attacked three times on campus, twice at night. I know it’s a different timeline now- but that’s just making me more cautious. None of us should travel alone- especially at night!”

“Right, we got an asshole who wants us dead. No sense being stupid.”

“Exactly,” said Eliot, stepping out of the shower. Margo stayed where she was sitting at his desk while he dressed. There was such an intimate bond between them and neither of them had any problems being nude with others in the room, but especially if it was each other. They had been partners during the secrets trial last year, they were naked for that, too.

“So how’d the psychic ward go? Little Q safe from the big bad mind-reader?”

“Not sure about that. It should work, but it had an- an. . . unexpected side effect,” Eliot said, stumbling over his words. 

“What do you mean? What side effects?”

“I didn’t realize the mental slip went _both_ ways. He saw some of my memories.”

“Well, shit. Enough for him to figure it out?” she asked with concern. She didn’t want secrets to ruin this relationship for Eliot before it even got started.

“Enough for him to question me and learn the truth, yes. He saw some of our later years at the mosaic. Seeing a man clearly himself but 50 or 80 years old made him curious. I had to tell him.”

“Did you tell him everything?”

“No, only that I have memories from timeline 40, I didn’t go into the specifics of the timeline. I mostly told him about the relationship between him and me in timeline 40. We will meet after class to fill both him and Julia in on the specifics.”

“Okay. So, we’ll have a big future planning pow-wow this afternoon.”

“Yup, three o’clock. We’ll have to clear the cottage. Q will bring Julia. After they are up to speed we can discuss how to bring Penny, Kady, and Alice on board.”

“Okay. I’ll make sure no-one will be in the cottage at three. How did Quentin take the news? About you and timeline 40.”

“Better than I would have. He believed me, I knew he would.”

“You might have ‘known’ he would believe- but you were still scared shitless to tell him,” Margo pointed out.

“I know. He’s too important for me not to have been concerned though. I just told him about our relationship, though. It was too late and we were too exhausted to get into the rest of it.”

“What’d he have to say about it? Did he think you were fated to be, or did he tell you to fuck off?”

“Ugh! He went all _responsible_ on me. Said we need time to make our own memories.”

“So no epic soulmate crap? I thought he was into fantasy?” Margo asked, confused.

“He is, but that doesn't mean he wants to dive into bed with someone who claims to have loved him in a past life right away.”

“So fantasy, not fairy tales. Good, he’s not completely hopeless then.”

“How do I look?” Eliot asked a few minutes later once he was done perfecting his appearance in the mirror. He was dressed in his brown slacks and dark red dress shirt, forest green vest on top. 

“Perfect.”

* * *

Eliot prepared martinis for the group to enjoy when they arrived. He also prepared some edible finger food. Nothing fancy, just some nachos with chili con queso, and some brownies, and, okay, some crab stuffed mushrooms and crab cakes, maybe some salmon pinwheels. Nothing fancy. Just trying to keep his hands and mind occupied until the rest of them arrived. His last class had ended early when a classmate had wrecked the room with bad spell casting. He had an hour to kill and chose to cook the time away.

Luckily, Margo had already made sure the entire cottage knew that Eliot and Margo were doing private work and to make themselves scarce. It was completely empty. He was all alone. . . He hated being alone. The possession by the monster had left some deep scars, some physical and some psychological. He couldn’t stand the quiet, especially here in the cottage. . . where he had spent untold months trapped in his own mind. 

Shit, now the walls were closing in on him, and he couldn’t breathe. _Shit shit shit!_

When Eliot was trapped inside his head, summoning the memory versions of Margo and Quentin had eventually gotten too painful. To have his friends right there and not be real, it hurt. But being alone was almost worse, it was so quiet and still, just reinforcing that it wasn’t real. His mental ears would ring in the stillness. 

Eventually, after maybe a day or a week, Eliot would cave and summon a memory Q or memory Margo to keep him company. But they would be wrong in some way and it _hurt_ almost as much as when they weren’t there. So he summoned other people, people he didn’t know so well and didn’t miss so much. That just made the wrongness even more obvious as his mind didn’t have as much detail to draw on and they seemed so fake, like plastic dolls. So he’d banish all the occupants of the happy place and he’d be all alone until he caved and summoned Margo or Q again. The cycle would repeat over and over and over. Summon friend, feel the artificial-ness, banish friend, feel isolated, summon friend, repeat.

Now, in the still physical cottage by himself- the same cottage he had been trapped in while possessed- he felt so trapped. _Out, out. . . I must get out! Trapped. . . can’t breathe. Help! Quentin!! Get me outta here. Bambi, Q, Margo, Q, Penny, anyone. Q, . . . help. . ._

“-ot! Focus on my voice. Just my voice. It’s gonna be okay. Breathe in, breathe out. Good.” Eliot slowly became aware of another voice in the room besides his own thoughts. He hadn’t summoned them, how did they get here? He was. . . confused.

“Put your head between your knees, like that, yes. Stay there until your chest loosens up, okay? That’s it, breathe deep. In, hold, two, three. Out.” Eliot focused on the voice, trusted it, followed the voice’s instructions.

“Shit, what happened?” A female voice asked.

“I-I- I felt the need to head down here early. I dunno, I just had the feeling he needed help. I found him like this. I know a panic attack when I see one, so I just told him to do what others tell me when I’m. . .” the voice trailed off.

“Is he saying anything?”

“Mostly he’s just repeating ‘Get me out’ and ‘all alone’. Give him a few minutes to recover,” the male voice said. _Were they talking about him? Was he really talking?_ Eliot had no idea.

“Yeah. I’ve never. . .” the female voice broke off.

“No history of anything like this?”

“Not that he’s told me.”

There were two voices Eliot could hear over the sound of his ragged breathing and pounding heart. As focus returned he realized it was Margo and Quentin. _I’m not trapped, they got me out. I’m in timeline 41. Not trapped, the monster's gone. Not trapped, the monster is gone._ Slowly, his breathing stabilized and he came back to himself. 

“Note to self, never be alone in the cottage again. Ever. Alone bad,” Eliot said, when he finally felt stable enough to talk.

“El, what the hell happened?” Margo inquired.

“You okay?” Quentin asked at the same time.

“I will be. Timeline 40 was a whole clusterfuck. I can’t stay in the cottage without others around. I forgot about that.”

“That- trauma induced panic?”

“Yeah. Shit happened and now being in the cottage without the company of others kinda. . .”

“Causes panic attacks? Fuck, El. That’s messed up,” Margo said. The cottage was their home, their palace. That El didn’t feel safe here by himself anymore bothered her. It wasn’t right.

“Royally fucked upped, yes. I’ll explain, when I get to that part of why I’m here. Speaking of, where is Julia?” he asked, turning to Quentin.

“Um, I-I-I don’t actually know.” 

“You didn’t come with her, or she with you, at least?”

“I kinda- dropped everything and ran all the way here. I-I ju-I just knew you needed help. I swear it was like I could hear you calling for me.”

“Well, yeah, I suppose I _was_ kinda calling for you, Q. . . In my mind. How did you hear that, it wasn’t verbal?”

“The spell, could that have caused this?” Quentin asked.

“I don’t care. I’m just glad you got to him, Quentin. What are you even doing here so early, El?” Margo asked.

“Todd blew up the class.”

“Oh, of course. So what, Farston canceled?” 

“Q!!” The front door banged open and Julia came barreling in, frantically calling for Quentin. “Oh, thank fuck! What the hell, you ditched me!” she said, slugging his arm.

“Sorry, my bad. He heard me calling for his help,” Eliot spoke up, before Quentin could make up some story to protect his privacy or whatever. Quentin couldn’t lie to her, just as he couldn’t lie to Arielle or Eliot.

“Oh. I didn’t hear. . . How’d you call him?”

“Mentally.”

“Seriously?”

“Side effect of last night's mirror ward, apparently. Came in handy.”

“You okay?” she asked him.

“I will be. I just forgot something and it, well. It won’t happen again.”

“Well, if you need time before you tell us the big news,” Julia started.

“No no no no. That’s not a problem. The sooner we start preparing the better. You two firsties are still too muggle and vulnerable. We need to fix that and you need to know why.”

“Well, then, let’s gather the treats you cooked us and go sit down,” Margo said, grabbing a few trays of the food Eliot had prepared prior to his panic attack. Julia grabbed the glasses and followed her. Eliot reached for the last trays, but Quentin beat him to it.

“You okay, El?” he asked quietly, looking him in the eye.

“Not really. I’ll talk to you more when we don’t have the ladies waiting on us, okay, Q?” Eliot did want to talk about it, but now wasn’t the time.

“Yeah, sure. I- I was just, you know, worried.”

“Thank you, for caring, and for helping. I needed that.” Eliot said, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing it. 

Quentin gave him a shy smile. “I’m glad I could help, Eliot.”

“HEY! Nutsacs! Get your asses in here!” At Bambi’s call Quentin headed into the main room. Julia and Margo were seated on the couch, drinks in their hands. He and Quentin took the adjacent couch, with Quentin sitting closer to Julia, where the couches met.

“Bambi, wards?”

“Up and active. Set to ten.”

“Good. Then there’s nothing to do but tell you. Julia, Margo and Quentin already know the big point. I guess I should start at the end of the story- the rest won’t make any sense till you know that part.

“A few days ago I visited a friend who had once locked me and my friends in a time loop, resetting it when we got killed by this beast. We finally survived in our timeline. Anyway, I- I needed her to reset the loop again. I- I lost someone, and I couldn’t. . .cope. After some convincing and dire warnings, she agreed. I woke up the day before the entrance exam- yours, not mine- with memories of how the last timeline went and the following three years.”

“You telling me you Time Traveled? Come on, didn’t Einstein say that was impossible?” Julia asked with skepticism.

“Well what do you expect a horomancy expert to say to muggles? ‘Time travel is possible with appropriate magic’? I don’t think so.” Margo said.

“Einstein was a magician?” Quentin asked, fascinated.

“And one of the first to successfully experiment with horomancy, that’s what we call time travel magic,” Margo explained.

“Okay, super cool, but also, not important to this discussion. Honestly, Eliot, I just met you two days ago. This sounds a little crazy to me,” Julia declared.

“Jules, remember that side effect of the mental ward I mentioned? It kinda confirms his story. I saw the two of us doing things I haven’t done yet,” Quentin spoke up.

“But that doesn’t really _prove_ it. Just ‘cause he has a memory doesn’t mean it’s legit. I mean, let me be the devil's advocate right now, no offense, okay? But he could have made it up or dreamed it or any number of other things. What says it's real, Q?”

“Hey, I asked the same kind of questions and I’m his best friend,” Margo spoke in his defense. “I can tell you he came to me a week ago, told me he was from a future timeline. He said we were about to meet the cutest nerd and that I was gonna love him. That’s a bold statement to make, by the way, cause I don’t love people- just Eliot. I thought he was nuts, but I’m his best friend so I waited to see what would happen. I met Quentin and you a day later- just like he said. He said you’re going to be a Knowledge student, and based on what I’ve learned about you so far, I think he’s right.”

“Okay, so he’s been predicting a few events for you. How does that help me believe him now?”

“Would personal facts I shouldn’t know yet convince you?” Eliot asked mildly. He had been expecting this from her, and the rest of them, after all. 

“Maybe. Depends on what you know.”

“I know how you and Quentin met, and how you became friends.”

“Hardly a deep secret, there, Eliot. With all the time you've been spending with each other I expect you to know that.”

“I know. But I also know why you chose to go out with James.”

“Did Q tell you about him?” She threw a look at Quentin, who held up his hands in an innocent gesture.

“Quentin 40 did. James was the first person to really kinda get between you two. But by the time you met him you knew Q had a thing for you and you were waiting for him to make a move. You were hoping showing interest in another guy might get him to make said move. You didn’t expect to like James so much, and you didn’t realize that it would just scare Q into _never_ making a move.”

“. . . okay, that’s actually. . . how could you know that?”

“I also know that it was only a month later that you found Quentin-'' he let himself trail off, shooting an apologetic look at Quentin. Julia going out with James had pushed Quentin into his first suicide attempt. Quentin had never told her James was the reason why, not wanting to be such a crappy friend that he guilt her like that. Julia had always suspected, but never had the nerve to confirm.

Eliot didn’t want to reveal Quentin’s secrets to Margo, it wasn’t his place. Quentin looked at him in slight surprise, before looking at his lap in shame. It wasn’t his fault, but Eliot would comfort him later. Saying anything now would just expose Quentin more. For now Eliot just squeezed his hand in solidarity.

“Don’t stop there! What happened to Quentin?” Margo asked, insanely curious about people as she always was..

“Sorry, Bambi, not my place to tell you that.”

“Quentin?” Margo asked, asking him to tell her.

Quentin looked at her for a long moment. Apparently whatever he saw there convinced him to open up to her about this. “I have- my brain. . . breaks, sometimes. It gets to the point where I feel like since life is not ever gonna be anything but pointless and empty then- then why try? Why go on?”

“Damn. Severe clinical depression?”

“Yeah. Try fighting with your own brain on whether or not to get up in the morning. It’s exhausting,” Quentin explained.

“I know. I had a friend when I was a kid, she had major depression after her dad died. Not the same as clinical, but it can be just as bad.”

“So you get it?”

“I do. You feel like that while you're here you come to one of us okay? I can kick your ass and bully your brain quiet,” Margo declared.

“Thanks, Margo,” Quentin said sincerely. Quentin smiled at her. Eliot was pleased he saw the real Margo hiding beneath her brash exterior already. Not many people ever really truly saw what lay behind Margo’s icy shell to see the caring person she really was. Eliot was one, and in timeline 40 Quentin had also seen her for who she really was. He was glad that was holding true for this timeline as well.

“So this incident you were mentioning, that was a suicide attempt?” Margo questioned.

“Yeah. It was the first time the broken part of my brain won.”

“Quentin- you never-”

“I didn’t want to guilt you, Jules. It wasn’t your fault I couldn’t deal.”

“I’m not so sure.”

“No, Jules. It’s not on you that my depression convinced me that life wasn’t worth living. No matter what happened that convinced me it was right, it's not your fault!”

“Not yours either, Q,” Eliot added. Quentin had always blamed himself for his depression. As if he could just wish it away. It didn’t work like that. No matter how much Eliot might wish it would. Depression took work and effort and help to overcome.

“Okay. Unless you are secretly psychic or that spell that shared memories gave you a lot more than just a couple memories… you’ve got good information from somewhere,” Julia admitted.

“This is the stuff Julia 40 said might convince you I know you better than is possible after three days. Was she right?”

“Yes. Okay, I’m going with you’re not crazy nor lying for now. So, how were you trapped in a timeloop?” Julia asked Eliot.

“Horomancy details hurt my head, so I can’t explain the mechanics to you. I know enough to know what _can_ be possible with an expert.”

“And the friend who did the timeloop is an expert?”

“God, no. No, she just had a device that gave her the ability.”

“Okay. Well, if you succeeded in whatever purpose the timeloop was created for, why ask her to reset it? That doesn’t make much sense.”

“The problem with magic solutions is that often you create an even bigger problem than the one you started with. I’ve lost count of the world-ending disasters me and my friends have put out.”

“Still, doesn’t seem to justify-”

“Jules!” Quentin spoke up, ready to defend him from having to reveal his vulnerable side.

“No, Q. She asks a valid question.”

“Eliot, you don’t have to-” Quentin tried.

“I know. But I’m going to. Not to the others, but since she’s your best friend, I can tell her.”

“Okay? What others?” Julia asked.

“Later. So it’s a long story but I got myself in a jam. My body was possessed by, well we called it the monster. Powerful enough to kill actual gods, and he was wearing my face, torturing my friends. And Quentin… was it’s favorite plaything. It stayed by his side, killing innocents at the slightest infraction, it broke his bones when he tried to leave…

“Well, they spent weeks trying to get it out of me without killing me. But they did it. Yay, I’m free. I woke up and asked for- Quentin… Bambi told me he didn’t make it. He died, thinking I-” he broke off. He had revealed more than he probably needed to, but after that panic attack his normal armor was down. 

Eliot felt Quentin take his hand, offering comfort. Quentin had been told this last night, he knew that Eliot had turned his Q down when he offered him his heart. Quentin knew that Eliot never got the chance to make it right.

“Holy shit. Quentin, you’re telling me Quentin died saving you? But still, losing a friend sucks, but that doesn’t mean...” Julia broke off noticing the way they were holding hands. How Q offered his silent support to the man sitting next to him.

“He wasn’t just my friend. We spent fifty years together in an alternate timeline that we remembered. We were married, Q also had a wife and they had a son. She died and we raised him together. Quentin was everything to me.” Eliot left out the part about having run from Quentin’s love for now. That part was private, they didn’t need to know that. He told Q, that was the only person who needed to know.

“Oh,” said Julia.

“It had been a tough couple of years for all of us. And he had been off his psych meds since he started at Brakebills. On top of that there was the added pressure to do well or flunk out of magic school and forget magic even existed. He also had tragic love affairs, magical beasts trying to kill him, his childhood fantasy land suddenly existing as a shithole of real life woe. And then he spent months with his once-spouse possessed by an evil monster. He was running on less than fumes by the end.

“He fought harder than anyone to get me back. Blocked any plan that ended up with me not saved. Put himself between the monster and me to keep my body safe. By the end he was… not in a good headspace. He died, suicide by heroic sacrifice. Save the world and die, way too tempting for him in that moment…”

“Fuck,” Margo said. She had heard many of the basics a few days ago, but he had not gone into detail about how Quentin had died. 

“So I wake up, weak as shit, and looking for the love of my life. But Bambi tells me ‘he’s gone, Eliot’. Took me several minutes to understand she didn’t mean he stepped out. I couldn’t take it. I had to fix it. I was not letting our story end like that. 

“I found Jane and told her what happened. Begged her to help me rewind time however we could. Her only option was to reset the entire timeloop. She said she could send my memories into the next timeline’s Eliot (that’s me). I didn’t care as long as I got Quentin back. So here I am.”

“Okay, Eliot. So Q died and you decided the best way to save him was to start another timeline?” Julia asked incredulously.

“It was the only viable plan. There was only one type of time magic that could help me, and the only thing it could do was reset the entire timeloop and start a whole new timeline. We could send my memories into the next timeline, that’s where we are now.”

“How many timelines were there and what timeline is this?” Julia asked.

“There were forty timelines. The memories I have come from Eliot 40, that is the Eliot Waugh who lived in the fortieth timeloop. The moment I woke up here, this became timeline 41. I technically never lived in timeline 40, I just feel like I did because I remember it.”

“So what happens to timeline 40 after you did whatever you did to send your memories to this timeline?” Quentin asked.

“That Eliot will get up the next day and try to continue living without his Q. He promised to try if they helped do the spell. He may never know what happens in this timeline.”

“Wow. That sucks. He doesn’t even get to know if we survive?”

“No. But it was worth it to give us a chance. Knowing we are here right now will let him push forward.”

“Why was there a timeloop in the first place?” Quentin asked.

“Because there is a bad-ass super-powerful beast-slash-magician with plans to kill us. The one resetting the timeloop, Jane, got one component of the machine from Quentin, a version of him anyway- the one that survived the beast. So each time he died she reset the loop.”

“Why the hell does he want to kill us?” Julia asked.

“‘Cause he has no conscience and wants all of magic for himself, especially any magic that leads into or out of the place he is hiding out.”

“Where is he hiding?” 

“Okay, to answer that we really need to go back to the beginning of the story. Not now, where the timeloop starts, but back to the creation of the beast. So, first off: Fillory is a real place.”

“Fillory? Are you- are you serious? Fillory is real?” Quentin asked. Eliot knew what a _Fillory and Further_ fanboy he was. To hear that it was in fact a real place was his fanboy dream come true.

“You’re fucking with us, aren’t you?” Julia accused.

“No, it is a real place I’ve actually been to.”

“That’s awesome!” Julia said.

“I know it sounds great, the place you always dreamed of exploring really is real. But please keep in mind the books do not tell the true tale, they are a Disney-clean version of the real place, ok? Some of the stuff in the books is real and it's wonderful. Some of it wasn’t in the books at all. And some parts of Fillory seriously suck, okay?”

“What do you mean?” Quentin asked.

“Well, take that healing river, what was it called,” Eliot turned to Margo.

“Chatwin’s Torrent?”

“Yes! That’s the place. It's real and it may heal, but the river guard or whatever he was called expects to be paid or he’ll curse you. And Fillory kicked out Martin who was looking for protection he couldn’t get at home.”

“Protection from what?” 

“Plover. He’s a pervert, and Martin was his favorite.”

“Wait- are you saying-” Margo asked. Shit, had he not mentioned that part the other night?

“He’s a pedophile. And Martin was at his mercy.”

“Fuck. Did that piece of shit become the beast?” Margo asked.

“That’s what we first thought, too. It would have been preferable. No, Martin eventually found a way to go back to Fillory, and he was determined never to leave again. He started drinking from the wellspring, the source of all magic. It ate away his humanity and he lost his shade- the part of yourself that feels emotion, and he eventually became the beast. He wants all magic, all routes to Fillory, for himself. And he wants all of us dead.”

“The beast you say keeps killing us, that’s Martin Chatwin?!” Julia asked. Eliot looked over at Quentin. He looked a bit in shock and a little queasy. Eliot took his hand and squeezed, offering silent support.

“Yes, Martin Chatwin grew up to be the beast. Jane tried to stop him, but failed. Jane brought Quentin in to help, and he died. She started a timeloop to stop her brother, changing one thing each reset. We finally defeated him in timeline 40, at the cost of a friend going Niffin.”

“I take it that’s bad, but what’s a niffin?” asked Julia.

“A being of pure magic. It may look like the person they were before but they don’t have what makes them human anymore, that part dies.” Eliot told them.

“Who-” Margo asked.

“She’s not here right now. We’ll bring her in later, along with the others.”

“How many of us were there?” Julia questioned.

Eliot counted off on his fingers, trying to remember who was there when they faced Martin. “Um, the four of us, plus Blondie, the traveler, the battle- no wait, she didn’t come to Fillory- but we’ll include her this time, and J- no, he’s trapped in the Neitherlands right now. Crap, he’ll have to wait until the traveler masters his ability and learns to take people with him, there's no way to get to him now.”

“Eight people? Four more besides ourselves are involved,” Quentin said.

“Yeah, three are here at Brakebills, I don’t know them as well as I know you, so I thought I’d ask you guys for advice on how to tell them.”

“Let's figure that out later. Tell us more about how these timelines work. What do you know about the previous ones? How much can you predict this one, start there.” 

“I know very little about the previous timelines, Julia. What I do know is that in every single timeline, prior to 40, Quentin is killed by the beast. I know that in most of the other timelines, most of the rest of us are killed too. Apparently, I died before the action in timeline one. Every time we died, Jane reset the loop changing one thing to see if it would help us survive.”

“What did Jane change for timeline 40 that allowed you to survive?”

“It’s not really important. I don’t think the final change is what allowed us to stop it.” 

“Well it must have. You were able to stop it in timeline 40 and none of the previous timelines were successful. So what did she change?”

“She kept you out of Brakebills, Julia. You learned magic from outsiders called Hedge Witches. But the end result was _very_ bad for you, so I made sure you were here this time.”

“What happened to me?”

“You _really_ don't want to know. You survived, but you were a fucking mess for a long time afterwards.”

“Eliot, she deserves to know,” said Margo, unaware of the fate that Eliot had saved Julia from.

“I would normally agree. But I promised Julia 40 I would never tell you. That’s all you get to know about how bad it was. Please don’t press. You do _not_ want to know.”

Julia stared at him for a long moment. She finally nodded her head. Eliot breathed a sigh of relief. He wouldn’t have caved into any pestering but avoiding it was better. “If my last self didn’t want me to know, if _she’d_ rather not know… I love knowledge. I can’t imagine what would make me not want it. So I’ll leave it be.”

“Good.” 

“So how did we finally defeat the beast? All this effort will be wasted if we get killed again,” Julia said.

“Q. He made a change, that’s what got us so close. He suggested we let someone else try to kill the beast, rather than him.”

“But being the hero is what he always dreamed of.” Julia said, confused.

“Yeah, but if it got us killed thirty-nine times? Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I may not have remembered the other timelines, but if I always tried to kill it and we always died? Time to try something new. Who did I give the task to?”

“Alice. She’s a talented magician. I’d say let her do it again, but he’ll be expecting it this time.”

“Alice Quinn? Doesn’t she come from a whole family of magicians?” Margo asked.

“Yeah. That’s her.”

“She’s my roommate,” Julia said.

“That bitchy blonde was friends with us?!” Quentin asked. 

“Well… she was dating- someone, and she connected to the group through that person,” Eliot explained hesitatingly. He didn’t want to reveal the whole Quentin/Alice drama. He did enjoy Quentin calling her “the bitchy blonde”, though.

“Eliot, honestly, you gotta stop with all the vague references we don’t get. If we are gonna stop this we need specifics. Got it?”

“Yes, Bambi.”

“Good! Well she wasn’t seeing Eliot, or me, pussies aren’t really our thing. Julia?”

“Nope, I go for dicks, too. Like 99% of the time.”

“Oh, we are definitely gonna talk about that one percent later, Julia. So who was she with, Eliot?”

Quentin gave Eliot a look, and Eliot could tell that he saw the truth written on his face. “You telling me I was with that hostile blonde?” Quentin asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yeah. For a year, two? Hard to say.”

“Whatever. Doesn’t matter right now. Can we just do what we did last time?” Margo asked.

“No. The beast remembers timeline 40 and will see Alice coming. He doesn’t know that I have memories of timeline 40, too, so we have that small advantage for now. But if Alice does the heavy lifting again she’s more likely to fail this time.”

“Okay, so Alice can’t strike the final blow. Who will?”

“Honestly, my vote is for one of our badass bitches to do it. You, or Julia would be best, but Kady is a battle magician. We’ll need a plan of action, but that can wait till we are more prepared to fight him.”

“Okay, tell me you have a timeline of future events.”

“Yes. Wrote it down when I got here. Margo, do you have it?” Margo handed him the notepad. “Thanks. Next big event is the summoning spell. Alice does a summoning to contact her brother on the Autumn Equinox and the beast comes twelve hours later, attacking the first year class.” 

“That’s in just over three weeks. Can we stop the spell?” asked Julia, skipping over the specifics for now.

“Dean Fogg and Jane both recommended we allow the attack as it is needed to convince the other three, Alice, Kady, and Penny, that I’m not psycho and that there is a danger. This time, I’ll be there when he strikes. Margo will too.”

“That doesn't sound like the smartest plan,” Quentin commented. “Just let the beast attack?”

“No it isn’t. But Penny and Kady are not the type to listen to reason without motivation. The beast _will_ kill Penny, and right now he wouldn’t believe me if I try to warn him.”

“Penny? You telling me my dickhead roommate was friends with me?” Quentin asked incredulously. With good reason, Penny and Quentin never got along, even if they were trying to work together. Quentin’s depression seemed to piss Penny off, and even Penny 23 could barely stand him.

“Yeah, sorry. Penny is a Traveler, he has the rare ability to go anywhere in the world or to any other world with just a thought. The beast will kill him since he can get into Fillory without the need for a portal or door.”

“Shit. Still, not sure doing a spell that we know may result in him coming is the best idea. Any other way to convince them?” Julia asked.

“Sure, I’m sure I could come up with something. Problem is, we need to convince them of the danger first. They won’t listen to me until they wake up to that. The spell and the attack will serve as a warning for them.”

“There has got to be some other way besides putting lives on the line, right?” asked Quentin.

“No, I’d love to, but Penny has had the beast’s voice in his head manipulating him his whole life. Right now, he trust s that voice more than he does anyone or anything else.”

“I hate to leave us vulnerable, but until we have a better plan…” Julia said.

“Okay, the summoning and attack. What happens after that?” Margo asked before the discussion could get sidetracked.

“The beast possessed a Brakebills alumnus. He uses him to attack Penny and Quentin. Not sure if he’ll try that again or not. He won’t have the same “in” to our group this time. 

“After that we got the button from the Plover estate. The button is a portal to Fillory. It wasn’t but a few weeks after we got the button that we knew the beast was coming for us. We did a probability spell trying to plan our next move. The only scenario where we didn’t die is when we went to Fillory ourselves. So, we trained in what battle magic we could, but without years of meditation we couldn’t do much without literally bottling our emotions.”

“So you need to be able to meditate to cast battle magic?” Julia asked.

“If you want to cast it repeatedly and reliably, yes. I’ve already started me and Margo on a meditation regimen. I suggest you and Q follow suit. We have a year to prepare, let's use it.”

“So what happened next?” Quentin asked.

“We took the button to Fillory. We landed in the Neitherlands and were ambushed by some magicians working for the Beast. Quentin got separated from the group, ended up back on Earth. He grabbed Julia and they hopped a time portal to follow Jane through to Fillory, made a deal to get the Leo blade made for us and somehow ended up back in the present.”

“Okay, we’re gonna need you to slow that down.” Julia said.

“When Q got stuck on Earth he had no way to get to the rest of us in Fillory. He slipped a truth potion to Dean Fogg, who then revealed the existence of the timeloop. He also revealed that Julia had been at Brakebills in the other 39 timelines. Quentin went to find you and together you hatched a plan to find a time bridge to a time when you know a door to Fillory will be open, to follow Jane through.”

“How did he plan to catch up to the rest of us if he was fifty years in the past?” Margo asked.

“Fillory is magic. There’s always a way.” Quentin said.

“That is precisely what he thought. While they were in past Fillory they went to a knife maker and had him forge a knife called the Leo Blade which they hoped we could use to kill the beast. They got to the present and we went to retrieve the blade, but only a master magician could touch the damn thing. None of us were there yet, so we petitioned Ember to give us a boost.”

Margo made a disgusted face at that. As a second-year student she was familiar with power boosts. “Isn’t he a ram or something? Who had to-”

“No. He gave us a- sample. To drink.”

“Not much better.”

“Agreed.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Julia asked, confused.

“When he says boost, he means a genetic sample. So someone had to fuck him or drink his spunk,” Margo explained.

“Yuck,” said Quentin.

“Yeah. Alice was the best magician out of all of us so Quentin, knowing timeline 40 was supposed to be our last chance, suggested Alice take the Leo blade, rather than him. But things went wrong and we lost it before we could strike.”

“What happened?”

“It’s too long to get into, and I know it won’t happen this time. It was caused by a series of events I’ve already nicked in the bud, got it? With the blade gone my friends went to find a spell powerful enough to stop the beast. They did, and Alice used it on the beast. Well, she tried. But the magic spunk was waning by then and she niffined out.”

“So how did we kill the beast?” Quentin asked.

“Niffin-Alice killed him. But she also almost killed you, so, let’s not let that happen again. Quentin found a way to restore Alice eventually, finishing work that Alice had started for her brother who had also turned niffin. Alice didn’t want to be human anymore, and it was a while before she got over that. Then she thought all magic was bad, and that had some nasty side effects.”

“Enough, we’re jumping around the timeline here. Let’s stick with the timeline of major events. What happens after the beast is gone?” Margo demanded.

“Most of the next events are specific to Fillory, or to events I’ve already derailed. I’m gonna skip those for now. The next major event was learning that Ember and Umber are dicks and don’t actually care about Fillory at all. I was kicked out for improving the kingdom. Ember was actually planning on destroying Fillory altogether. There was an argument and Ember killed Umber and then we kinda killed Ember to keep him from totally destroying Fillory.”

“Fuck. Well, did it work? Did it save Fillory?” Julia asked

“There are consequences for killing gods. The Old Gods shut off all magic, everywhere. Quentin and I found a quest- the key quest- to find seven keys to restore magic. It took weeks but we did it. It was during that quest that we spent fifty years solving the mosaic to get the time key, Quentin. You gave the key to young Jane Chatwin when she came looking for it, knowing she used it to make the timeloops.”

“Shit Q, you’re in the books!” Julia exclaimed.

“Wow, my fanboy dream come true,” Quentin said, a little bit of awe in his voice. Eliot knew that he would most likely still love the books and be a fan even if the ass who wrote them was a pervert. Quentin 40 had never stopped loving the books no matter how often the real thing dicked him over.

“Anyway. The final part of the key quest, shit went down. We were ambushed by some Librarians who wanted to horde magic for themselves and they put a siphon on the source of magic. This allowed them to control how much magic was or _wasn’t_ available. I’m told they kept ambient magic very low. On top of that we accidentally released an ancient evil monster with a grudge against the gods that had the power to kill said gods. It possessed me for months, torturing my friends physically and emotionally. Margo found a metal that when forged into a weapon allowed it to depossess people and they used it on me. Stabbed me in the stomach and the monster was evicted. 

“They bottled up the monster and applied an Incorporate Bond to keep it in the bottle. The bond had to be reapplied constantly until the monster could be disposed of. They found this place in the mirror world called the seam and went to toss the bastard in. But this guy, Everett, thought he could use the monster to become a god. Everett broke the mirror containing the seam. Q fixed the mirror and tossed the monster in, but you can’t cast magic in the mirror world. Magic refracted everywhere and both Everett and Q died.”

“You haven't had a decent rest in years, have you?” Quentin asked him.

“Last time I slept well, not counting the mosaic, was before your trials. So, no. It’s been a long couple of years.”

“Well, it sounds like we want to avoid killing gods. Will that short circuit the key quest and your subsequent possession?” Quentin asked.

“It should. But we have to keep Ember entertained or he’ll try to destroy it again. And when we go to Fillory, lets avoid making any marriage deals, okay?”

“Wait, what?” Julia said.

“Did I leave that part out?”

“YES!” three voices shouted in unison.

“Well, the knife maker wanted his family to be on the council, via marriage to the high king.”

“Who was the high king?”

“Me. I wasn’t a great king, but I tried. Problem for me was the knife-maker had a daughter. I liked Fen, but I was a terrible husband to her, especially given that I like pussy like I sometimes like Thai food. I was very sexually frustrated. I don’t want to put anyone through that again.”

“Anyone who wants to use _any_ woman as currency in a deal will have to go through me,” Margo said with ice in her voice. “I’ll ice their dick off if necessary.”

“Thanks, Bambi.”

“Remind me not to get on your bad side,” Quentin stage whispered. Margo just gave him a vicious smirk. He didn’t seem bothered by it.

“So we find another way. We can give them a seat on the Fillorian council without marriage. A word as bond, or something, so they know we mean business. But no arranged marriages on my watch.”

“What do we do now, to prepare to survive and defeat the beast?” Quentin asked.

“We read up on Fillory, so we all know when something comes up that’s from the books. We all learn how to meditate, and then practice battle magic. And until our meditation is ready we just practice any non-battle magic spell that can be used offensively or defensively. We let Alice do the major battle-magic spell we used last time unless someone else volunteers. I’ll ask Henry where to find it, and we stay on our toes for when the beast comes. 

“I tell the other three that doing the spell will result in the beast attacking, and wait till they accost me afterwards to explain that I’m from the future. Julia and Q: practice magic like your life depends on it- 'cause it really does. Master the Poppers and other movements as fast as you can.”

“How long until they do the summoning, again?” Julia asked.

“Two weeks.”

“And how do we survive the beast's first attack?” was Quentin’s question.

“By being ready. After they do the spell, I’m gonna follow behind you to all your classes.” Quentin didn’t look overly reassured, but it was all Eliot had. 

“When are you gonna tell the other firsties about this?” Julia questioned.

“In a week, maybe two. I don’t want to tell them too soon, they might forget afterwards. But I don’t want to warn them at the last minute either, it doesn’t give the right effect.”

“I’ll leave that to you and your sense of theater.”

“One of the two of you will need to help Alice with the summoning spell. Jane kinda pushed Quentin into it last time, gave him a mark on his hand in a dream, the mark was on the book Alice needed to perform the spell. Jane’s not able to give you dreams this time, so you’ll just have to convince her by telling her you know what happened.”

“But we don’t know, Eliot. You do.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll give you details,” Eliot said. “What I know is that her brother tried to undo a fellow student’s beauty spell-”

“Fuck. Who was so stupid?” Margo asked.

“Beauty spells are very dangerous, and never go right. They almost always seriously mess up your face, so don’t ever try one. Charlie loved her so he tried to reverse it. But it was too much yet he refused to stop. He niffined out. The girl dropped out and gave up magic.”

“Why the hell would she do a thing like that? What made her try a beauty spell?” Margo asked.

“Being in love with a professor who was married. Which, I don’t get the appeal. Can you believe she had a thing for _Mayakovsky_?”

“Oh my god! Even if he were hot, which he is _not_ , I still wouldn’t give him the time of day! And she fucked him?” said Margo, laughing in disgust.

“Who’s Mayakovsky?” Julia asked.

“You’ll meet him later this semester. He’s a total perverted asshole. So ignore any digs he makes towards you. He’s a gifted but difficult teacher. The more he insults you, the more potential he actually thinks you have,” Margo told them.

“He can be a good teacher, but his personality makes what you learn barely worth it,” Eliot adds.

“Since Alice is my roommate, I’ll see about asking what she's up to and see if I can help cast that summoning spell.”

“Good. I think we covered enough for today. Anyone have anything else they need to know right now?” Everyone shook their heads. They all needed time to process, it was a lot even skipping over all but the most major relevant points.

“I’m hungry, so I’m going to make us some more substantial food,” Eliot said, rising from the couch.

“I’m going to work on practicing the spells from that advanced physical magic spellbook. See what spells I can master,” Margo said, grabbing the book in question from the pile on the table.

“I guess Q and I should head back to the dorms or library to study. If we are going to improve our magic at speed we need to practice.”

“Of course you do, but why should that mean you have to leave? Study here, join us for dinner,” Eliot said.

“You sure?” Julia asked, looking at Quentin. But Quentin looked quite content to stay at the cottage. 

“I don’t invite people I don’t want around, Julia. You are both welcome here anytime, whether you want to study, party, or just chill,” Eliot said.

“Okay. Whatever you cook is probably better than what the cafe is serving, based on the edibles you made for this little pow-wow.” Indeed, the snack trays were completely empty.

Eliot left the three to study their various interests while he cooked. He made a simple chicken Alfredo dish that he knew Quentin loved. He had such simple tastes most of the time, but Eliot loved him anyway. When he finished cooking he called the others into the kitchen and they enjoyed a friendly meal getting to know each other better. They left talk of the future and the beast for later. 

After they ate and cleaned up, Margo let down the wards so other students could get back inside. The four of them went to Margo’s room to study. Eliot and Margo worked on their meditation and physical fighting magics. Eliot was getting closer to finding the quiet place in his mind. Margo had mastered three spells this evening. Next to them, Julia and Quentin worked on their Poppers. Eliot was sure that they would have them down rapidly, looking at their hands now. They were still a little slow, but they had mastered many of the initial movements.

Eventually, Julia and Quentin decided to call it a night. They packed up their books and headed back to their dorms, wishing Eliot and Margo a good night. Margo kicked Eliot out so she could relax before trying to get some beauty sleep. Eliot went back to his room and spent the next hour reading _Fillory and Further_ book 1. He was starting to see why Q had loved them so much. They really did wrap you up in a whole new world. Eliot knew exactly what that was like, having lived in Fillory, so he knew it was pretty accurate in description. Before he knew it, he’d been reading for over two hours and he was falling asleep. He marked his page and closed his eyes.

T.B.C. . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve no idea why Eliot decided to have a panic attack. But I was writing the scene and next thing I know he’s in the middle of a panic attack. I think it works.


	8. The Warning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eliot warns the remaining members of the group about the upcoming attack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news: I was inspired to write some more, so I decided to reward your patience with an update. Not sure when the next will be, lots happening in my life right now. It is coming, just not sure when I'll get to posting it.

AN: So, good news, everyone. I’ve gotten to the part of the story where time starts _moving_. I know its been slow moving thus far. That is about to change.

**CHAPTER 8: The Warning**

9/13/2015

* * *

Before Eliot knew it another week and a half had passed and he still had not talked to Alice, or Penny, or Kady. It was now coming up on the end of the second week of classes. He had just a week left before the Equinox. He had to find time (read: stop making excuses) to talk to Alice. She was the more knowledgeable and reasonable among those still not aware of Eliot's origins and would therefore be easier to approach- in theory.

Julia had reported that she had made a tentative friendship with Alice based upon their mutual intellect. Julia was trying to drop hints that she could come to her for help, but Eliot, knowing Alice’s pride when it came to performing magic, didn’t think that would be enough. If all else failed Julia would just find her on the Equinox and offer her help. It’s what Penny had done, so it should work. It’s not like Alice could perform the spell with less than four people, it would be too unstable even if she got it to work at all.

Meanwhile, Eliot had actually finished the first Fillory book and was now halfway through the second. Margo was now rereading the first book. While she had read them when she was younger it had been several years since the last time, and she wanted to make sure she was ready for whatever Fillory threw at her.

On this Thursday afternoon, however, Eliot was on the patio on the back side of the physical cottage practicing the advanced physical spells from the book Margo had found on using physical magic in a magical fight. He was nearly finished with the book and ready to find another text. He was working on a spell to lock someone in place like they were frozen in time- results vary, the spell warned. He wanted to try it on Fogg and see how it did against a nearly-master magician.

He noticed Quentin approaching from the other side of the cottage. Over the last week both Julia and Quentin had become regulars at the cottage. The rest of the residents gave them funny looks the first few times but didn’t blink an eye anymore. Not that they ever objected, after all, Eliot and Margo ruled this cottage.

“Hey, Q,” Eliot greeted him, pausing in his spellcasting.

“Hey.”

“Where’s Julia?”

“Studying in the library.”

“With Alice?”

“No. According to Jules, Alice is not working on schoolwork and snaps at anyone who approaches her in the library.”

“Yeah. She was the same way last time.”

“Julia says she just studies near her and helps snap at people who disturb the quiet. It’s slowly creating a minor bond.”

“Good. Did you go see Healer Abby today?” Eliot asked. Quentin had promised to go in to see the healer who worked with magicians with psychiatric conditions. 

“Yeah. She recommended staying on what I’m currently taking. Changing my meds could mess me up more since they take two weeks to start working. So she wants to keep me on them and see how I’m doing in a couple weeks.

“She’s added a weekly potion which will reduce side-effects and help with mental clarity. She also gave me a potion for emergencies. Apparently it’s a very mild version of the emotion bottle.”

“I hope it’s _really_ mild. Drinking three hours worth of emotions will really fuck up your shit. I speak from experience.”

“Yeah, she said it had a similar effect but instead of bottling emotion this potion will just allow some detachment from the emotion. Abby said it’s for when I can’t handle my emotions, whether it’s depression or panic attacks. It’ll fuck your casting for a day, so it is only for emergencies. I’m not even allowed to keep it on me. If I need it I have to go to the infirmary and a healing student will give me the dose.”

“What about when you're so fucked up you can’t move?” Eliot asked, alarmed.

“I asked, she said that I’d better not let myself get that far, for one. But if it does happen I can send a friend to fetch a healer. She warned me that if it happens she’ll be seeing me weekly until further notice and that it will be _mandatory_.”

“Damn. So, I guess you’d better speak up if you start feeling that way.”

“Yeah. Jules said she’d be there to help if it happens, but she’ll kick my ass afterwards, with prejudice,” Quentin said with a chuckle.

“I’ll be here, too, Q. Anything you need.”

“Thanks.”

“How’re you classes going?” Eliot asked, and the conversation switched to a more neutral topic.

“Fine. My professors say I’m picking it all up rather rapidly. I’m not on Julia’s or Alice’s level but I’m not far behind either.” There was a proud smile on his face. 

Eliot was pleasantly surprised to hear that. Quentin 40 had always been terrified he’d be kicked out. Eliot had thought his grades must have been poor if that was the case. He honestly didn’t know if this was a result of Quentin 41 being on his medications, or if Quentin 40 had just freaked needlessly. Both were distinct possibilities.

“Good. I’m glad you’re doing well.”

“All this life-or-death extra studying we’re doing is really helpful. Not to mention the idea that a beast is coming to kill us is excellent motivation to master magic quickly.”

“Yes it is.”

“You get around to telling Alice, yet?”

“Nope, I’m still avoiding that,” Eliot confessed.

“You’re gonna have to stop procrastinating, Eliot. You only have ten days left till the Equinox.”

“I know, I know! But I just-” 

“What, El? What’s stopping you?”

“I don’t want to yell at her.”

“What are you talking about?”

“When Q40 died, everyone kept looking at Alice40 like she was a grieving widow. She had gotten back together with you for all of one day and yet she was allowed to cry and mourn like she had the claim to being your widow.”

“And you’re mad at her for that?”

“Kinda?” Eliot half said, half asked.

“Or maybe you’re actually mad that maybe Quentin 40 really did love her?” Quentin questioned knowingly.

Eliot gave Q a guilty look. How did he know Eliot so well already? “Am I that obvious?”

“It’s what I might feel, in your shoes. I mean, I’m a bit jealous of that wife you had and I know you’re not even that attracted to women.”

“You’re jealous of Fen?”

“A little.”

“That’s so cute,” Eliot gushed with a laugh.

“Fuck off,” Quentin replied without any heat, giving him a smile.

Eliot sighed. “So I’m mad at her for being someone Quentin 40 loved. That is fucked up. And possibly unfair, especially since this isn’t that Alice.”

“You know it doesn’t mean he didn’t love you, right? I _am_ capable of loving multiple people at a time.”

“I know. And Alice 40 knew you loved me, too. We avoided each other for weeks, trying to give each other room to grieve.”

“You two had something in common. You both loved, and were loved by, Quentin 40. But, Eliot, this Alice and I are not the Quentin and Alice you remember. You get that, don’t you?”

“Sometimes. Sometimes I forget.”

“You don’t have to compete with Alice 41 for my attention. You’ve got it already. That look in your eyes when you think I’m not looking, it’s pretty heady. I’m already getting addicted to it.”

“What look?”

“The one that says ‘you’re my world’. I’m not going anywhere, El. We have time to make some excellent memories, whatever our future holds.”

“Not if we don’t get to work. Where are you in your basic studies?”

“Popper 250-280.”

“Don’t forget to keep practicing 1-250. Your fingers need constant practice.”

“I know,” said Quentin, pulling out his book. Seeing that he was now working, Eliot went back to his own work. 

The girls joined them a few hours later. Julia brought a book she had found on meta-composition. She found the area easy for her, and Eliot recalled that it was a Knowledge discipline. He had never heard the exact area of Knowledge Julia’s discipline was in, so he was not sure if that was hers or not. And he had no idea if disciplines changed at all from one timeline to another.

Margo had a battle magic text out and was reviewing the spells. She wasn’t ready to cast yet, Eliot thinks, but she wanted to be ready for Martin’s attack on the first years. So she was attempting a few select spells in the book she had. Eliot was joining her as he had finished with the physical magic for magical battles text as well and didn’t feel like meditating just now.

Quentin was trying to meditate. He had read the texts that Eliot and Margo had found and had been trying to put the practices into place for the last week. It was hard going for him as he had one of those minds that didn't like to quiet down. His brain was always thinking, which often wasn’t a good thing as far as he was concerned. It also made meditation difficult. 

This was how the four friends usually spent their days. They attended classes in the morning and early afternoon. They did their homework and studied- well, most of them. Eliot didn’t spend much time on that since he had long since mastered what his classmates were learning. But the other three did not have his advantage and needed to actually study the material. 

After completing course work for their classes they worked on their advanced studies. Julia and Quentin worked ahead in their textbooks to master the basics. Then they would be able to start trying non-class spells after this week. Eliot was planning to help tutor them in some of the physical spells he had found that might be helpful in a magical fight. 

Margo studied ahead and worked on further mastering the spells she found as well as looking for more spells to try. She meditated and was already learning to find that clam place that was needed to use battle magic reliably. When she needed a break she would read _Fillory and Further_ to be ready to go to the real Fillory.

The four friends were not always together when not in class, but they were in a group more often than not. For Eliot it was familiar to be surrounded by these people, even if he had never spent much time with Julia before. For Margo it was still very new to be hanging around people other than Eliot, but she was adjusting like the king she was. Quentin and Julia were used to hanging around one another whether they interacted with them or not and were not phased by the addition of two more.

Well, for the most part they were unphased. It still sometimes shocked Quentin that he was hanging around the Brakebills’ equivalent of the popular kids. He found it weird that said popular kids _liked_ him and wanted him around. They weren’t just trying to prank him, they genuinely cared for him. It was a new feeling. A feeling he kinda liked and wanted more of it.

* * *

ALICEALICE

Sunday afternoon Eliot was on a mission to find Alice Quinn. He had been putting this off long enough: it was time to talk to her and warn her.

He searched the library, where she was known to spend hours studying and researching. There were many students in the library, so it took him a while to search the whole thing. Most Brakebills magicians were also the geeky types, those who were above the curve when it came to intelligence. So, the library, the house of knowledge, was more packed than might be typical at another college.

There was no sign of the blonde Eliot was looking for in the library. Eliot checked her dorm room which she shared with Julia. The room was empty. She wasn’t in the cafe, or in the practice room. Eliot wished he knew her better and knew where to look. He couldn’t even do a simple locator spell as he didn’t have anything that belonged to her. Dammit, where is she?

Eliot finally found her sitting outside by the Wolf fountain. That was a bit ironic. Alice’s brother Charlie had niffined out here outside this very fountain five years ago. As far as Eliot knew, Alice was currently unaware of this fact.

“Alice Quinn?” Eliot called as if he didn’t know.

“Whatever you want help with, find someone else,” Alice snapped, not even looking up.

“I’m not really in need of your help, I just wanted to talk to you,” Eliot tried.

“Well I don't want to talk to you!”

“It’s not really gonna be a two-way conversation,” he said.

“Tell it to someone else.”

“Nope. Has to be you.”

“Go away!” Eliot had forgotten just how prickly she had been before Quentin had befriended her. Eliot wished that he had the same natural draw that Quentin possessed. Quentin just had this natural ability to make people _care_. Whether it was to care about him, about magic, about themselves, he just drew people into his circle. Maybe if it was Quentin here instead of him she would listen.

“Look, Alice, I have something important to tell you, and it can’t wait.”

“Well I have no need to hear what you have to say,” Alice shot back, finally looking up from her work in order to glare at him.

“Yes, you do. What do you know about horomancy?” 

“Nothing you can’t learn from a book,” she snapped. 

“I’m not grilling you for information! Honestly, I know more than you anyway, I just need to know where I need to start in my explanation.”

“You can start by leaving, like I said.”

“I’m not leaving. I need to talk to you, and it would really help if you weren’t so hostile.”

“Fine! If you won't go, I will.” Alice started packing up her books ready to storm away, Eliot was sure.

“If you leave, I’ll follow you.”

“What the hell do you want from me?!”

“I just want you to listen. You can tell me to fuck off when I’m done, but I’m not going to leave until you listen to what I have to tell you.”

“Why should I?”

“Cause it might save your life,” he said in exasperation. At this she stared at him, trying to read his face.

“How?”

“Among other things, I’m here to warn you.”

“About _what?_ ” she asked.

“The summoning you want to do to call your brother, it’s not gonna work,” he said quietly. Alice’s eyes widened. As far as she knew there was no way he could know what she was trying to do. 

“How do you-”

“Horomancy. What do you know about it?” he repeated.

“I know it’s difficult magic no second-year physical student would be able to perform.”

“Oh, I didn’t do the spell,” he said with a smirk.

“But- then who did?”

“Ever heard of the Merken Ziet ritual?”

“No.”

“What do you know about timeloops?”

“Not much. The few things I’ve heard said you can’t confirm if they exist unless you are the creator. No info on _how_ you could create one, though.”

“With certain magical devices created by gods or an actual horomancy expert, it's possible to create a time loop.”

“Why would anyone do that, though?”

“To stop a tragic event. Like say, the death of a brother or lover.”

“Seems there should be a simpler way to save said person,” she muttered.

“Necromancy is nefariously unstable, Alice,” Eliot responded.

“What’s this got to do with me anyway?”

“The Merken Ziet ritual is a specialized spell to send the memories of someone to an alternate version of themselves. Generally, this is from one timeloop to another.”

“Okay. Still not seeing the relevance.”

“I asked some friends to do the ritual on me,” Eliot said. Alice didn’t take but a couple of seconds to grasp his meaning. She was a quick thinker, always had been.

“You’re trying to tell me we’re in a timeloop?”

“Yes.”

“How do you plan to prove that? Even if there are spells that can create a timeloop, it doesn’t mean you’re not lying.”

“That’s why I’m talking to you now. The summoning you’re planning? It’s not gonna call Charlie. The beast that answers the call will come and attack the first year class. He’ll try and kill Qu-Quentin. Hell, he might try and take you out, too, given what happened last time.”

“How do you know about Charlie?”

“Timeloop. We were friends, of sorts.”

“Right. A party boy like yourself and a socially awkward nerd like me were friends,” she said sarcastically.

“We had a mutual friend. He kinda bonded us together,” Eliot admitted.

“I don’t have friends. Nor do I want friends.”

“I know you think that now, Alice. But friends are there for you whether you want them to be or not.”

“So, what, are you trying to tell me not to do the summoning?”

“No, I’m not. As much as it will put all of you first-years in danger, it will also help prove my claim to the three of you who aren’t involved yet.”

“Involved in what?”

“In surviving the beast. Stopping him from killing us. He wants all magic for himself. I know magic is not exactly something you love, and I can’t blame you, given your history. But there are those who are only alive because of what magic has given them.”

“So, what are you saying? That I should do the spell, even though you claim a monster will try and kill us if I do?”

“Not a monster. A beast. Let's hope we never face the monster this time, okay? No, do the spell or not, I know the risks so I’m not telling you which to do. You have to make the decision yourself.”

“Do you know what happened to Charlie?” Alice asked.

“Do you actually believe me?”

“It’s not impossible, I suppose. Couldn’t hurt to hear what you may know.”

“Charlie was trying to reverse a spell a girl in his year had done to make herself prettier,” Alice’s face showed her horror. As a daughter of magicians she was well aware of the risks of performing such spells. “The magic was too much, yet he refused to stop. He, I’m sorry Alice, he became a niffin.”

“How do you even know this?”

“We were friends.”

“I don’t think I’d tell you.”

“No, you didn’t tell me. You told our mutual friend and many, _many_ years later he told me.”

“Why? Why would he tell you? Why did I tell _him?_ ”

“You two were close. He helped you do the summoning, helped you find out what happened. He told me once when he was grieving a friend who had also gone niffin.”

“Still, it wasn’t his place-”

“Maybe not. But he was a mess and desperately wanted to reverse it. Your previous self had cobbled together a couple aspects of a spell to do reverse a niffin. He was looking into your research, trying to finish it.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah.”

The two of them sat together in silence for a few moments. Alice was most likely processing what Eliot had told her, deciding whether or not to believe him. Eliot, himself, was just thinking back to the days when Quentin was trying to save Alice from being niffin. 

Eliot had been dealing with his own crap in Fillory. Learning to run a country he knew nothing about. Trying to teach basic farming techniques to people who had relied on magic for ages. Trying to prevent a war with a neighboring kingdom. And missing his best male friend who was so lost to grief for the girl he had truly loved.

“I don’t know if I should believe you or not,” Alice said finally, shaking Eliot out of his own thoughts.

“I know it’s difficult to trust, Alice. I’m not pushing you here. But be careful, okay?”

“No one has really cared about me since Charlie died,” she said, sharing some small amount of herself with him. He smiled at her in understanding.

“I know what that’s like. Brakebills was the first place I found someone who cared about me as well.”

“Crappy family?” she asked, not unkindly. 

Eliot didn’t respond. He had only ever shared his family details with two people. He wasn’t about to change that now. Alice didn’t press him, seeming to understand he wasn’t gonna talk to her about it. 

“Yeah, I get it,” she said. Eliot knew that she did understand. While Alice’s parents loved her, they were not adept at showing that. Plus, her parents threw the kind of parties that no child under the age of thirteen should even know about, never mind witness. Even he didn’t talk so openly to his kids about sex as to encourage orgies! But he was never close enough with Alice for him to share his own trauma.

“Well, good luck with your spell. And for what it’s worth, you were always the best magician among us,” Eliot said, getting up from his seat and leaving her to her thoughts. Now that he had told Alice, he just had to talk to Penny and Kady. That was more likely to result in someone getting punched. He just didn’t want it to be him.

* * *

TIMETOGETAMOVEON

It took Eliot a few more days to pin down Penny and Kady and have a talk with them. It seemed that Penny 41 and Kady 41 were together in this timeline as they had been in the last timeline. It was more familiar to him then the Penny/Julia couple that Penny 23 had mentioned. Penny was a hard-ass and Julia was more gentle. Sure, she was a badass bitch when she wanted to be, but unless you pissed her off she was a loving, spirited woman.

The talk with the two of them went pretty much as he expected. When he finally told them he had the memories of the future version of another timeline they told him to fuck off. He told them what was coming for them in the next few weeks, as well as making allusions to his personal knowledge of them. 

Kady was shocked when he told her where to find the Emerson’s Alloy Repellant that Marina wanted. He warned her that she might prefer to keep it for when the beast attacks, but was unsure if she’d listen. Marina had a stranglehold on her right now, and he doubted she really believed him.

Penny was ready to flay him alive after what he told Kady frightened her. Eliot was quick to demonstrate that he was a stronger magician and he’d better be careful. Eliot had spent two years using magic to fight for his life, Penny as a first year student in his first month at Brakebills had nothing on him. Especially since he was a psychic, not exactly the best magic in a fight. 

Eliot warned him that the voice he always listened to was trying to manipulate him to use him to kill people. Penny didn’t know that voice was Martin Chatwin, magic-hoarding, sociopathic killer. Eliot didn’t tell him much, only that the voice belonged to someone who wanted to use him as well as kill him and several other students. 

“If you get my friends killed I will make your life, what little you will have left, hell on earth, or any other world for that matter,” Eliot warned him.

“Fuck off, psycho!” was Penny’s less than witty comeback.

“We’ll talk more when your class is attacked.”

“Whatever,” Kady said, walking off with Penny following.

They didn’t believe him and Eliot had not expected them to. Time would tell whether they would become allies sooner or later. Martin would try and kill all travelers in a few months, at that point Penny would need them if he wanted to survive.

Eliot and his three close friends continued to prepare for the attack and later battles with Martin. Eliot and Margo were perfecting the spells they had learned from the text about using physical magic in a magical battle. They were making slow progress on using battle magic, but were getting a few spells to do something. Only long-term meditation was going to make it a reliable tool, but that took time. It was unclear whether or not six months of meditation would make much of a difference in their ability to cast battle magic. 

Alice was finally warming up a bit to Julia. She had asked her bluntly if she knew Eliot Waugh’s secret (that he was from the future of an alternate timeline). When Julia admitted she knew, Alice had questioned her further. She asked if she believed him and why. After that conversation Alice had allowed Julia to help her do the summoning spell. Julia was a talented magician and Alice and her worked well together academically.

Before he realized it it was the night of the Equinox was tomorrow and Eliot was a nervous wreck. He paced in his room where he, Q, and Margo were making some last minute plans. Or maybe they were all just waiting anxiously. Julia was preparing the summoning spell and relevant material with Alice.

“El, calm the fuck down!” Margo finally snapped at him after listening to him pace and fret for almost half an hour.

“I can’t. We are preparing to let Martin Chatwin onto campus and attack the first years- attack Q. What the hell were we thinking?!”

“You were thinking a little planned danger now might save their asses later. Now stop being a cock and cool it.”

“This is crazy. I can’t believe I agreed to this.”

“El,” Quentin jumped in before Margo blew up at his worrying, “it’ll be okay. We know what’s coming and we’re as ready as we can be. You’ll be there, so will Margo. It’ll be okay.”

“Since when did you become such an optimist?” Eliot asked.

“Since I met you. If someone as amazing as you can exist, and actually like a depressed super-nerd like me, anything is possible,” Quentin said with a smile.

“Ew. I don’t need this sugar coma, boys.”

“So leave, Bambi,” Eliot said. He kept his eyes on Quentin, though. 

“Okay. I know when I’m not wanted,” Margo replied.

“Never, Margo. You’re always wanted somewhere,” Quentin said.

“Good boy,” Margo replied. “I’m going to find some other place to be wanted, then. Night boys.”

“Night, Bambi,” Eliot said, turning to give her a peck on the lips as she left. 

“Just you and me now.”

“What do you want to do?”

“Tell me more about the mosaic? What are the memories like for you? Are they like a dream, or like they happened yesterday? Did you feel fifty years older when you remembered? Have they faded over time, or-” Quentin finally trailed off realizing that he hadn’t given Eliot time to reply yet.

Eliot sighed and sat down on his bed next to Q, wrapping his arm around the younger man. “It seemed like a dream, at first. The memories came slowly, but crystal clear at first. It didn’t feel like I had lived it, that time was so separated from the rest of my life. Mostly it felt like a story I had been told rather than events I had lived.”

“So it was more like a movie you watched?”

“I guess you could say that. I felt too far removed from that idyllic life. Like it _wasn’t_ _me_ , you know? Like I had one perfect day, but I had been some perfect version of myself. A version I couldn’t be on a regular basis.

“That’s why I said no. I was sure I would fuck it up, fuck us up… fuck _you_ up.”

“You didn’t see how you could be that version of yourself with everything else going on at the time, with your friends and with magic. And you didn’t think he would want to be with you if you were _not_ that version of yourself.”

“Exactly. I didn’t trust myself.” Quentin didn’t respond to that, just nodded. He had not been there and had not had his heart broken by Eliot’s fear so he didn’t feel he could really offer absolution or forgiveness. It would mean nothing to either of them, just empty words, so Quentin remained silent. 

“Did you feel you went from 80 to 27, or were your memories too separate?”

“It was more like I had seen a movie of that life, like you said, I still felt like I was my twenty-seven year old self that never went on the quest to solve the mosaic. Yet I could still remember that life fairly well. It’s hard to explain. I guess it was like I had two lives, and I didn’t remember either one more or less than the other, until I chose to behave as my twenty-seven year old self would.”

“Yeah, that’s a difficult thing to get my mind around.”

“Wasn’t easy for me and I lived it.”

“How did Arielle become part of our relationship?”

“She liked you, and she came by all the time, bringing baskets of peaches and plums. I was still scared of an exclusive relationship and was being biphobic. I was under the impression you were more straight than bisexual at the time. I was corrected years later. But her being with us gave us Teddy, so I never regretted it.”

“Were we a true thrupple, or were you and her sister-wives?”

“Both. We were more like sister-wives, since I prefer men ninety-seven percent of the time. But occasionally it would be just me and her in bed together. Both of us preferred sex with you (either together or separately) rather than with just us, so it was only a few times that it was me and her.”

Talk between the two men continued like that for another hour, before they decided to meditate and try to get some sleep. On this night, Quentin stayed in Eliot’s room, sleeping next to the man. He didn’t always stay the night, but this wasn’t an uncommon occurrence either.

They were still behaving like friends who were considering becoming more, but were not ready to act on it yet. The flirting and physical closeness were a stable in their relationship as it had always been. Both men agreed to take time to become friends before they moved their relationship in a more romantic direction.

Eliot wanted to move things along, he had missed Q and wanted to hold him, kiss him, love him. But he understood Quentin’s desire to make sure that Eliot knew _this_ Quentin and wasn’t seeing only his lost lover. Quentin didn’t deserve to compete with a ghost, though he told Eliot he knew the ghost of Quentin 40 would always be with Eliot and that given time that would be okay. 

Eliot still wasn’t sure himself which Quentin he saw when looking at the young man. That was enough to keep him in friendship territory right now. If he couldn’t be sure who he saw, how could Quentin be expected to know? The problem was they really weren’t very different, Quentin 40 and Quentin 41. They were the same man with the same childhood experiences. 

The biggest differences between the men were Quentin 41 was on antidepressants and so wasn’t so down on himself nor as terrified of being kicked out as Q40 had always been. He also hadn’t spent months loving, mourning, and trying to save Alice Quinn. He was younger and more innocent than the Quentin Eliot had last known. But he was so like the man he had originally crushed on when he stumbled onto campus and into Eliot’s life.

The two men continued to share dreams, and had learned the one who fell asleep first usually pulled the other into his own dreams. Since Quentin was a bit of an insomniac this meant they usually shared Eliot’s dreams. This was often memories of their time at the mosaic, but also included more than one nightmare of his time being possessed. Eliot was grateful that so far he had not dreamed of the memory of the Monster using him to strangle Quentin. He knew it was inevitable, though.

Quentin’s dreams usually included being in Fillory and strange warnings from Jane Chatwin as a child. Since the elder Jane was not around to give Quentin the dreams she had in previous timelines, Eliot suspected the Fillory dreams were a leftover from the dreams Quentin had been given in previous timelines. He mostly ignored their messages, as they seemed very jumbled and not very reliable.

On this night, Quentin fell asleep first, but the dream was one of the first year class at Brakebills being attacked by a man covered in moths. He recognized the man from Eliot’s description of Martin Chatwin- Beast form. In this dream the beast managed to kill Julia and Alice before he ripped Quentin's heart out of his chest and crushed it. He bolted awake, sitting up with a choked off scream.

Eliot sat up after him, pulling him into his arms and holding him close. It was his worst fear realized, and he desperately prayed to any and every god he could think of to not let it come to pass. He couldn’t lose Quentin like that, not so soon. Quentin just clutched at Eliot, taking comfort in his friend’s presence.

It took over an hour for them to calm back down enough to try and get more sleep, it was still well before dawn and they needed to be ready for tomorrow. Eventually they did drift off again, still in each other's arms and into blissfully dreamless sleep. 

SUMMONING

Eliot, Margo, and Quentin waited in the physical cottage for Julia to come give them a report. It was just after midnight, and the summoning had to be done at exactly midnight tonight. So the three friends waited together for news on how it went. Eliot went from pacing like a caged cat to sitting next to Quentin and holding him tight.

Quentin tolerated it with grace, well known for being a bit fidgety himself, he tended not to be bothered by similar traits in others. Margo rolled her eyes whenever Eliot switched from pacing to holding Quentin, but had yet to snap at him. He was worried, and right now they were just waiting, not trying to do something his nervous behavior was interfering with, so she graciously allowed it with minimal comment.

Finally, at almost thirty minutes past the hour, Julia entered the cottage, looking around before spotting them and coming over to join them. “Julia, thank god. This one here is driving me crazy,” Margo said.

“Hush, Margo,” Eliot replied, too serious to even use her beloved nickname.

“We did the spell. Kady and Penny arrived just after Alice realized we needed four people to perform the spell, just like you predicted, Eliot. Penny seemed a bit spooked that we were doing a summoning, but he ignored it and assisted with the summoning spell.”

“Anything happen?”

“After everyone had cleared out, I went back to the room to grab an ingredient I left behind. On the mirror we used to call to Charlie was a smiley face drawn in the fog.”

“Shit. That’s what he did on the desk when he attacked the class of first years last time. It’s one of Martin’s calling cards.”

“That’s good, isn’t it? We were expecting him to answer the call, right?”

“Yes, I know. I just-”

“Wish there was another way. We know, Eliot,” Julia said.

The four friends sat in contemplative silence for several minutes. Each thinking about how bad things could go tomorrow afternoon and what they could do to limit the danger. Tomorrow, if the beast came, the real preparation would begin.

T.B.C. . . .

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bored? Check out Rizdance's Magicians fics. I recommend Magic Curses series.


	9. The Attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Beast attacks the first year class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. I just moved and this is the first chance I've had to post a thing. Life is crazy and I'm not sure when I'll post again, I've got a house to unpack. But I hope this will tide you over till I can get back to writing.

**Chapter 9: The Attack**

* * *

Monday 9/21/2015

Monday morning the four magicians were prepared to battle for their lives. Eliot and Margo skipped their normal classes and stayed close to their two first year friends. Dean Fogg had given them a pass to skip for the week but if the attack did not come by then they would be on their own. Neither cared, as long as Quentin and Julia were okay.

When the four got to the first class they noticed that Alice was also a bit jumpy. Apparently, she had taken Eliot’s warning seriously enough to be on edge today. She had a serious look in her eyes and seemed to be practicing spells under her desk, rather than paying attention to the professor. She gave Eliot and Margo a look as they followed in after Quentin and Julia, but said nothing.

Penny and Kady pointedly did not look in their direction at all- the only real indication of nerves on their part. No matter how little they believed him, hearing someone claim that your class would be attacked at a specific time set anybody on edge. Especially since with magic there was the distinct possibility that it was going to happen.

The first two classes passed by both agonizingly slowly and simultaneously rapidly as well. It seemed to Eliot like he blinked and first class was finished. Before they knew it, noon was approaching. Eliot was actually hoping the beast wouldn’t show, but also terrified he wouldn’t. If he failed to show then it would seemingly prove to Alice, Kady, and Penny that Eliot was lying. At the same time, it would prove that all of Eliot’s knowledge of the future is useless. He honestly did not know what he would do if that happened. Whatever else, he was prepared to fight. 

Why did the first years have to have Metamagic with Professor Stitch for this? The man was doing his best to put his students to sleep. They needed to be alert for when the beast came. 

Eliot kept anxiously checking his watch. The beast was due at noon. It was 11:40. Twenty minutes left before the beast attacks. Hopefully he wouldn’t fall prey to the anesthesia effect of Professor Stitch's voice. He had to protect his friends- protect Quentin.

The next time he looked at his watch it read 11:50. How was time moving so fast?! Who the hell was casting a horomancy spell? 

It was 11:55. Oh shit. There wasn't enough time! They weren't ready for this! But it was too late to turn back now.

His watch said 11:56. How was that only a minute? He kept seeing all the ways Quentin could die. He could have his throat cut, arterial bleeder, heart ripped out, choked, shot, drowned. It was too much, how could he be expected to protect Quentin from all that? He couldn’t and then Eliot would _lose_ him, _again!_

. . . . . . 

Then 11:58, oh shit, he wasn’t ready! Two minutes to go. Why did he think this was a good idea? Why didn’t he stop them from preforming that stupid summoning? 

. . . . . . 

Now it was 11:59. Was time actually slowing down? Why were these last minutes taking so long to pass? 

. . . . . .

. . . . . . . .

At 12:00 exactly, his watch stalled, the seconds no longer ticking forward, but flickering back and forth. He was frozen, couldn’t move a muscle except for his eyes. Luckily he was facing the mirror on the left side of the room in preparation. 

Then he heard whistling. He hated the sound of whistling. “The Farmer and Dell” was bad enough with lyrics, the tune being whistled was worse. Whistling made it so high pitched it was like nails on a chalkboard, grating against your nerves. That Martin whistled while attacking and killing people was just plain creepy. The man had no sense of style.

As expected Martin Chatwin attacked Professor Stitch and the man was dead before anyone could respond even had they not been frozen under a paralysis spell. Then he fully stepped out of the mirror to inspect his handy work while whistling and skipping as if it were a lovely day. Eliot supposed to Martin-Beast, it _was_ a lovely day. A lovely day of murder. 

The beast looked just like Eliot remembered. He wore a grey suit similar to those the Library Order wore, grey, dull, boring. Except this grey-suit wearing man was far more deadly than most Librarians. His face was obscured with thousands of moths flying rapidly around it, making it impossible to make out even the slightest feature. Not that Eliot needed to be able to see the man underneath, he already knew who it was.

Eliot couldn’t move. Neither could anyone else in the classroom. Martin had them all under either a horomancy or paralysis spell. They would be helpless to defend themselves against this killer. 

Or they would be, if not for the watch in Eliot's hand. He was not as caught unaware as his classmates.

Eliot had remembered Quentin telling him that Martin had used some type of paralysis spell when he attacked that first time. He had prepared a horomancy counter-spell inside this watch. If it stalled for more than one minute it would activate and hopefully counteract the beast’s spell. Thank god he had taken that horomancy elective back in his first year, otherwise he’d have been screwed.

Even if it turned out to be a purely paralysis spell, the magical wave from the watch should undo the spell. If not, they might be in trouble until dean Fogg could get here.

By the time the first minute was up Martin had killed Professor Stitch and was walking around like a tiger stalking its prey towards Quentin. Luckily, he seemed to be in no hurry.

“Quentin Coldwater!” Martin called out. “There you are, you bothersome little brat. And Alice Quinn, what a surprise you are. Let’s just put a stop to that, shall we?” Apparently he had decided that Alice was indeed a threat, as Eliot had thought he might.

That was all Martin got to say before the watch activated and suddenly they could move again. Eliot was quick to cast a physical banishing spell to push Martin Chatwin away from Quentin and Alice. It caught him unawares and he was thrown back a good 3 feet. 

Margo was quick to follow up with shooting icicle spikes at the man, her discipline being cryomancy, aiming them on his hands before he could defend himself. Eliot could see blood on his hands where the ice blades had hit.

Distantly he heard screaming over the pounding of his heart in his ears. The rest of the students in the class were making a quick run for it, hoping to escape the madness before falling victim to the violence around them. Eliot was barely aware of this as he focused on fighting the beast.

Quentin had quickly risen from his desk after Eliot tossed Martin across the room. He cast a shield spell around the group of six future questers who still remained to combat the beast that attacked their class. Eliot noticed that Kady was still here, casting some battle-magic spell, no doubt, but he didn’t see Penny. 

Kady was moving her hands rapidly to shoot off whatever spell she had decided to use against their opponent. Eliot and Margo joined her in spell casting, each doing their own spell and not waiting to see what the effects of their spells were. It was much better to cast five spells and only hit the target once, than to cast one spell that missed.

A wave of magic visibly left Kady’s hands once she completed the last movement and slammed into the beast. Eliot’s spell missed when he fell, causing the spell to pass above him, rather than hit him and it slammed into the wall where it had no effect as it was only meant to cut flesh. Margo must have accounted for Martin falling or she had time to re-aim because her spell hit just after Kady’s did. 

Martin made a sound of pain, and his head hit the wall behind him. Hopefully the moths surrounding him were more of an illusion and he actually did have a solid head under all that to hit against the wall. Eliot didn’t know for sure, it’s not like he had checked that closely after they defeated him last time. The months had flown off and he never saw them again. 

Before any other magic could hit the fallen man, Martin was up on his feet gesturing with his right hand and Kady fell against the desks on her right clearly she was hit by some force. The magic had blown right past the shield that Quentin had cast as if it weren’t there at all. Her head slammed against the corner of one desk, and Eliot was sure that it would bruise. One magician down, five still kicking. But now they had lost their best battle magician.

Martin made another movement to cast another spell at them. Luckily, this time the shield stopped it from hitting any of them. The backlash sailed harmlessly over Martin’s head. Quentin grunted from the impact on the shield and fell back a few steps, as if the force of the impact had a physical effect on him as the caster of the shield, pushing him backwards.

Julia who had been knocked down in the mad scramble of the masses to exit the room was finally on her feet. Seeing Quentin struggling to hold the shield he was trying to protect them with she quickly cast her own, allowing him to drop his own and recharge before casting another on top of Julia’s, making it stronger.

Meanwhile, Eliot, Margo, and Alice were casting additional spells at the beast even as he attacked the shield. All three were talented magicians in their own right. But Martin was a magician who had grown extra fingers to increase his power. He was simply a faster caster.

Martin’s next spell hit Julia’s shield before Quentin could cast the reinforcing shield. The next three spells he rapidly cast hit the combined shield, but it was enough to knock them down. Julia and Quentin yelled in pain the force of the spells injuring them somehow, Eliot assumed. The shields failed under the assault. 

Eliot and Margo were casting various physical attack spells, but Martin was moving so fast he was blocking them and still casting offensive spells at Quentin and Julia. Alice was casting whatever spells she thought would be useful. One or two caused Martin to pause and try and hit her, but the shield stopped them from effecting her.

Eliot had forgotten just how quickly Martin could cast given the fact that he had six fingers per hand. Yet this was still easier than some of the obstacles Eliot had faced since they killed the beast. He had faced gods that wanted to kill the world he stood on, a Faery takeover of his own kingdom with no magic to defend himself with, and a peasant uprising set on dethroning and killing him. And the worst of it all, he had faced waking from a possession to find the man he loved no longer among the living. 

After all that, Martin Chatwin was just not as scary anymore. Quentin being injured, however, that scared him.

Martin tossed a spell that hit Quentin before anyone could react. Quentin was tossed to the opposite side of the room, landing in a crumpled heap on his left side where he lay still, unmoving.

“Q!” Eliot called, rushing over to him and kneeling to check on him, leaving the offensive work to the girls. Quentin had clearly hit his head, but Eliot didn’t have time to do more than protect him from further spells right now. 

Eliot shot a quick spell at Martin over his shoulder, but it didn’t have any effect on the man. Martin cast another spell he aimed at Alice, but it missed. 

Alice didn’t even flinch when Quentin went down. She was on her feet very rapidly performing a spell that sent the beast back a few steps. She recast the spell immediately after, not pausing in between the end of one repetition and the start of the next. 

Julia must have caught on to her plan, because she was quick to join in, moving her hands the exact same way as Alice. Eliot didn’t know if she already knew the spell Alice was casting or if she was just copying her movements. Whichever it was, it was working. The two women working in tandem pushed Martin back to the mirror. Margo was waiting and promptly punched him, sending him all the way back through the mirror he entered from. 

As soon as the beast was through something hit the mirror, breaking it and preventing the beast from coming back. Eliot looked in the direction the object had come from, and saw Kady had recovered enough from her earlier hit that she had thrown the unknown object and broken the mirror. 

“Good throw,” Margo said. 

“Nice punch,” Kady shot back.

“Everybody okay?” Julia asked. Alice and Kady both replied in the affirmative.

Eliot turned his attention back to Quentin and his heart stopped when he noticed his head was bleeding and his eyes were closed. Quentin had to be okay. He _had_ to be.

“Q,” Eliot whispered, too scared to raise his voice. He shakily raised a hand to check Quentin’s pulse. He breathed a slight sigh of relief when he found one steady under his fingertips. 

“Q!” Julia shouted, running over to them. “Is he-”

“He’s alive. But currently unresponsive. We need a healer.”

“Where the fuck are the professors?” Kady asked.

“It’s only been two minutes since that- thing- arrived. I guess they haven’t had time to arrive here yet,” Alice replied.

“How the hell _did_ it get in here?” Kady asked.

Before anyone could respond a groan came from under Eliot’s hands. “Quentin, don’t move yet. You’ve hit your head pretty hard, wait for a healer, okay?”

“Mm? Oww,” was his only reply, but he didn’t try to sit up, so Eliot was satisfied.

The door burst open a moment later, though Eliot was shocked it had been closed at all. He doubted any of the retreating students had thought or cared to close it behind them in their haste. Not that it mattered. Dean Fogg and Professor Sunderland entered the room, hands clearly ready to cast whatever defensive magics they needed to and finding no aggressor.

Seeing Quentin down the dean turned to the door where several students were hovered watching in fear and morbid curiosity. He pointed to a random student. “Go and get professor Lipson from the infirmary. Tell her to leave any other cases to her students for now and to come immediately. Go!” 

“Anyone else injured?” Professor Sunderand asked, after the student had left, scanning the room to check for additional injured students. She looked at each of the students who had fought the beast carefully.

“Kady hit her head as well,” Julia said, giving Kady a concerned look.

“Miss Orloff-Diaz, are you alright? Any dizziness, blurry vision, ringing in the ears?”

“No, I’m fine.”

“Get her an ice pack, I can already see a bruise forming,” Professor Sunderland called.

“What the hell was that thing?!” 

“One thing at a time,” Sunderland tried to reply, but was interrupted by the arrival of professor Lipson. Eliot tuned out the rest of Sunderlan’s questions in favor of looking after Quentin. The others could answer just as well as he could. Quentin was his priority.

“Mr. Coldwater? Are you conscious?” 

“Yes.”

“Were you unconscious at all?”

“Yes, he was out cold for about thirty seconds, I think,” Eliot spoke up.

“Lets get him turned over on his back.” They moved Quentin gently on his back, using Eliot's natural telekinesis to avoid causing further injury. Lipson pulled out her magical lenses and looked him over. 

“He hit his head hard enough to cause some minor swelling and of course the bleeding you see. I need to take him to the infirmary to get him properly attended to. You’ll have to stay an hour, maybe two, but that should be all you need.” 

“I still need to ask him about the attack,” Professor Sundeland protested.

“And you can still ask him after he’s been treated,” Lipson shot back firmly.

“Very well. Mr. Coldwater, I will come see you before you are released. If I do not get there first, I want you in my office by 6 o’ clock, understood?”

“Yes, ma'am.”

“Mr. Waugh, Ms. Wicker, I have some more questions for you,” Sunderland said, when she noticed the two of them preparing to follow Quentin and Lipson.

“You can find me next to Quentin when you’re done here,” Eliot said as he helped Lipson get Quentin to stand up. Eliot did not want to leave Quentin on his own just yet. Maybe he just needed visual and physical confirmation that he was alright after the fear and adrenaline rush. He didn’t care if it came off as needy, as long as he stayed by Quentin’s side.

“You’re needed here,” she tried to object.

“Pearl, let him go to the infirmary with Mr. Coldwater. Start your questions with these ladies,” Dean Fogg said before Eliot could object. Eliot gave him a grateful nod.

“I’ll stay here and answer questions for now,” Julia said. “I’ll find you after, okay Q?”

“Yeah, that’s good, Jules,” Quentin said.

“Very well. Lipson, Ms. Orloff-Diaz will be joining you when she’s done with me,” Sunderland stated as Eliot and Quentin followed Professor Lipson to the infirmary. 

Quentin was directed to lay on one of the beds and Eliot was quietly admonished to stay out of the healer’s way. Eliot watched as the healer scanned Quentin again and started casting some healing magic on him. There was apparently little magic that was safe to cast on someone’s head, so they mostly relied on potions and time to repair and prevent further damage the blow to the head had caused. 

Eliot waited with him patiently, glad just to see that Quentin was okay. Idly, Eliot wondered what had happened after he had left the room. The girls would tell him later tonight, he was sure.

THE QUESTIONING

Margo watched Eliot leave with Quentin and Lipson. She was worried about their little nerd like Eliot was, but since they had some sort of life long love shit going on she kept back and allowed Eliot to take care of him. How on earth had that high-strung nerd become so important to the two of them? They were superficial people, how the hell had she been infected with _feelings?_

“Ms. Hanson?”

Margo turned her attention back to professor Sunderland. “Yeah?”

“I asked what the beast that attacked you looked like.”

“Like a stuffy lawyer with moths instead of a head.”

“What do you mean?”

Julia spoke up before Margo could get pissed off. “It mostly looked like a man, dressed in a grey suit, but we couldn't see his face. There were these moths flying around his whole head, we couldn’t see past them.”

“Now, Ms. Jones stated that it went right for Mr. Coldwater as well as Ms. Quinn. Is that accurate?”

“Yes. Damn monster went straight for them. Might have been ‘cause they were sitting front and center when it came through.”

“Where did it come through from?”

“That mirror,” Julia said.

“Ms. Quinn, how did it know your name?”

“I have no idea. But my parents are well-known magicians. Maybe they had dealings with it before? Or maybe my brother? I don’t know!”

“Calm down. It’s gone now.”

“How the hell did it get in here,” one of the students still at the door spoke up.

Sunderland faced the students as a whole. “I know you want to understand what happened here. What I can tell you is that we live in one world among many. This beast came from another such world. We do not know the exact nature of this entity, only that it was powerful and malevolent.

“Brakebills is protected by many magical wards and shields. We are still investigating how this beast got through. Rest assured that if someone is responsible, they will be expelled,” Sunderland said seriously.

“Those of you who fled are excused. Classes are canceled for the rest of today as well as tomorrow. They will resume Wednesday. Expect a quiz.” The rest of the student body dispersed.

“Now, tell me from the beginning, what happened?”

The four girls told Professor Sunderland what had happened. How it had killed professor Stitch before ever stepping out of the mirror, how it attacked Quentin and Alice, how Julia and Quentin cast a shield, the whole story. They did leave out their knowledge from Eliot being from a future of another timeline, but they told her the rest of the facts of the attack. 

“Ms. Hanson, why were you and Mr. Waugh here instead of in your normal classes?”

“We got bored, decided to tag along with the newbies,” Margo said, not batting an eye.

“Seems to me attending a class you already passed would hardly alleviate your boredom.”

“We were watching them learn new spells. It was fun to see all these magical babies struggle.”

“Nonetheless, that does not excuse you from your own responsibilities.”

“No, but this pass does,” Margo said, handing over the pass dean Fogg had given her and Eliot.

“Henry,” Sunderland said, turning to the dean who had remained in the classroom and was directing the clean-up operations. “Why did you give two students a pass to skip classes for a week?”

“A bad feeling in my gut was telling something bad was about to befall the first year class. I didn’t know when, and I didn’t have the resources to deal with it myself. When Mr. Waugh approached me with similar concerns, I took the opportunity to provide better protection for the first year students.”

“Ms. Hanson, why did you and Mr. Waugh volunteer to skip class to watch over the first years?”

“We befriended some of them. We weren’t about to let them get hurt.”

“Very noble of you, but you will still have to make up the work you missed today.”

“We know.”

“Very well then. Ms. Hanson you are excused for now. Ms. Quinn, please tell me what spell you were casting on this beast.”

Margo stayed a few more minutes until Julia was also excused. Then they made their way to the infirmary to check on Quentin together. They were also semi-escorting Kady, who was making her way to be checked out by a healer. Kady didn’t see a need but Margo and Julia insisted. They may not be friends but they were grateful she had helped combat the beast. The least they could do is make sure she was not too badly injured in the fight.

* * *

CATCHING THE REST UP

The infirmary entrance was on the east side of the courtyard, very central to the academic buildings in case of accidents during lessons. The long building that housed the infirmary was covered in glass on the outside of the building, allowing a maximum of natural light in. 

Kady parted ways with Margo and Julia at the front desk after she was directed to a free healing student to attend to her injury. Margo and Julia were led to the exam room where Quentin was being treated. Quentin sat up on the exam bed, awake and alert, with Eliot standing at his side.

Margo would never admit it to anyone, but she was relieved to see Quentin was awake and alert when she arrived. Seeing him hit his head so hard he was knocked out and started bleeding had made her a bit antsy. Somehow, this high strung super nerd had already wormed his way into her heart. She’d never forgive him for making her care and then dying on her. So it was a good thing he was okay. Now she was only pissed at him for making her care.

“You done lying about like a cock, Quentin? Time to stop playing dead and get back to work,” Margo said.

Quentin turned to look at her and smiled, as if she had made his day. “I’m almost done here, Margo, thanks.”

“Well if you’re not even going to pretend to be intimidated, why do I bother?”

“Oh, you’re very intimidating, Margo, never fear.”

“Q, you okay? The bleeding stopped, I see,” said Julia, going over to his bedside to get a better look.

“I’m just waiting to get out of here. I hate hospitals.”

“Well of course you do, Q. Everyone hates hospitals,” Eliot said fondly. They all laughed at that, alleviating some of the remaining tension from facing the beast for the first time. Eliot might have had experience facing that thing before, but it was still new for the rest of them. 

The three friends waited for Quentin to be done healing. They talked about what magic they learned that morning, or what they were doing with their time off tomorrow. No one mentioned the beast or the attack, saving the heavy talk for when they had more privacy.

Finally, Lipson arrived and kicked the lot of them, Quentin included, out of her infirmary. The four friends left to chat by the fountains on the northwest side of campus. It was a bit out of the way, which offered some privacy, but was still open enough for them to keep an eye out for Penny, Alice, or Kady if (when) they came around seeking answers. 

Eliot sat down with his back facing a fountain with an angel for a statue, pulling Quentin down with him and wrapping his arm around him. Quentin snuggled into his side, resting his head on Eliot’s shoulder. Julia and Margo sat facing the boys, a friendly distance between them. All four were ready to discuss the day's events.

“So, now it’s official. Eliot came from an alternate timeline slash the future. He is not crazy,” Julia said.

“Don’t insult me, Wicker.”

“You know what I mean. Now we have proof that this time magic is real.”

“You didn’t believe me before?”

“You knew I was taking a trust-but-verify approach. What you knew about me and Q was good, but predicting an event like this really solidified my belief.”

“Well, now you know I’m not bull shitting you. Timeline 40 sucked balls, and I don’t want a repeat. We’ve got to do better this time.” 

“Speaking of time magic, are you?” Alice said, approaching them from behind Eliot. Eliot jumped slightly and Quentin made a sound of protest. He squeezed Quentin in apology.

Quentin lifted his head enough to look at Alice as he greeted her, apparently deciding to be polite. “Hello,” was all he said.

“Alice, hi,” Julia greeted.

“Sit down and join us,” Eliot agreed. Alice sat down between Julia and Eliot, making a U-shape between the five of them. 

“What the hell was that thing?” Alice asked them, looking at Eliot.

“We called him the beast. He’s a magician who wants all magic for himself. And he’s willing to kill to get it, we just happen to top his current hit list.”

“Why attack us?”

“Originally? I don’t know. Now? Habit, I guess.”

“Shitheads!” Everyone turned to see Kady approaching, a small patch bandage on the left side of her forehead where she had hit it on a desk during the fight. Penny was right behind her, completely uninjured. The two of them took seats across from Alice, completing the circle she had started by sitting where she had. 

“Where were you, psychic?” Margo shot at him, pissed he had bailed on the rest of them. Which didn’t totally make sense given that she didn’t even know him, but still, she was pissed.

“I ran out to get Dean Fogg. Not like I knew what spells to cast at that thing. Luckily, Fogg was heading towards our class, but by the time we arrived you guys had dealt with it.”

“Whatever. You three willing to listen to the voice of experience now, dickwads?” Margo asked.

“Ready to hear him out. Wait- you know about it?!” Kady asked.

“I’m his soulmate, of course I know about it!” Margo said, affronted.

“I thought he was queer, not straight,” Penny shot back, in full dickwipe mode.

“Platonic soulmate. And with that attitude you can get lost,” Eliot said, not putting up with his crap. The man was the most insecure person he ever met, and he had been married to Quentin Always-Insecure Coldwater.

“Penny. We need to hear them out, stop antagonizing them,” Kady chided. Eliot had always admired her no-nonsense attitude. Penny looked sullen but didn’t argue. Since he didn’t say anything insulting either, Eliot let it slide, for now.

“So, what was it that attacked us?” Alice asked again.

“That was a magician who went to great lengths to protect himself and lost his conscience- his shade- in the process. He wants to kill anyone who can get from earth to Fillory- where he is hiding out.”

“Why attack a bunch of first years?”

“You ask him next time you have tea with him,” Margo said.

“Now, now, Bambi, no need to be hostile.”

“Look, will you all just shut up and listen to the only one who _knows_ what is going on?” said Quentin. “Let him tell you what he knows, then you can ask questions.”

“This isn’t some class, dork. We need answers!” Penny shouted.

“And you’d get them if you close your mouth and open your fucking ears,” Julia shot back.

“Penny!” Kady said before it could devolve into a shouting match. ‘ _How the hell had they all acted like friends once?_ ’ Eliot wondered. He remembered working together fairly well to survive, and keeping ties afterward, but he has no idea how such different people become friends. Except that somehow, each of them had connected to Quentin Coldwater and he had bound the lot of them into a single unit.

“Tell us what you know,” Alice said in a fairly commanding tone.

So Eliot did. He told them about Martin Chatwin, how Plover had abused him, and how he wanted to escape to Fillory but kept getting kicked out. He told them how Martin drank from the Wellspring and the effects that had on ambient magic and as a whole and Martin personally. Eliot told them about his previous timeline’s encounters with the beast and how they had finally defeated him. He told them it had taken Alice turning into a niffin to defeat him.

“I don’t get it,” Kady interrupted. “If you defeated the beast, why create a new timeline? I know losing someone sucks, but it could have been all of us. So why?”

“Because that wasn’t the end of our troubles. The Wellspring was fucked up which was wreaking havoc on magic everywhere, and then the gods of Fillory decided to go nuclear on the whole planet. That would have been unacceptable and we ended up killing one of them to stop it. Word of advice: don’t kill a god. It got magic turned off like it was a light switch. 

“Getting magic back was a whole ordeal and we somehow released a monster so bad the gods were afraid of it. With reason apparently, as it did kill several of them when it got loose. So, why a new timeline? To stop all of that,” Eliot explained. 

Eliot left out that this was all to save the group member that was the heart of them, their driving force. They didn’t need to know this was all to save the man Eliot loved. Those that were most affected now knew about it: Q, Julia, and Margo. The rest didn’t have to know. 

“So you fixed one thing and broke three more, is that it?” Alice asked.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“What makes you think this will be any different?”

“Nothing. But we had to try something.”

“Can we avoid the rest of that shit?” Kady asked.

“I hope so. It's why I did this,” Eliot fibbed. It was partly true, he hoped that they could stop Martin and not bore Ember and prevent the rest of the catastrophes.

“How?” Penny asked, for once without any snarkiness.

“By defeating Martin better and faster. This time we all have the warning. We can do this.”

“So what’s the plan? What do we do next?”

“We train like our lives depend on it. Master every spell we can, practice battle magic-” Margo said.

“I thought that was forbidden,” Kady interrupted. “Sunderland just gave me a ton of shit for the one spell I cast earlier.”

“Normally you’d be right. But, Sunderland doesn’t know about the timeloop. Dean Fogg does, and he gave us a special pass to learn battle magic.”

“How?”

“He’s a powerful enough magician to be aware of the many timelines, and he can remember them all.”

“Then why doesn’t he kill the beast?” Alice asked.

“I have no idea. But it’s not coming to kill Henry Fogg. Martin is coming to kill all of us. Unless we stop him,” Eliot said.

“So we train. We meditate so we can cast battle magic reliably. We master every spell that might help. We study Fillory history so we know what we are in for,” Margo said. She always did make an excellent commander.

“How do we study the history of a place we’ve never been?” Alice asks.

“The Chatwins told their tale to Plover, who wrote up their stories as a fantasy series. While not the most accurate source, the books do contain vital information that may help. I recommend you all read them so you’re not caught unawares,” Eliot said.

“We’re not ten! I’m not reading some grade-school fantasy shit,” Penny said, rather petulantly, Eliot thought. For someone claiming he wasn’t a child he was behaving rather childishly.

“Fine, skip the reading. Don’t come crying to us when you're stabbed with a magical knife from Fillory and don’t know how to stop its curse from killing you,” Julia said.

“That's a real thing?”

“It happened in timeline 40. If Quentin were not an expert on Fillory you would have died. But hey, why listen to the voice of experience? Take you chances.”

“Fine, whatever. I’ll read the fucking kids books!”

“Wise choice,” Margo said.

“What’s the next thing we have to deal with if this timeline goes like timeline 40 did?” Alice asked.

“The next thing with the beast was him possessing someone and trying to kill Quentin and Penny. He could go for Alice this time, like he did earlier today, or he might not do that at all. He won’t have the same in, but be wary of anyone new showing up on campus.”

“Why won’t he have the same in?” Kady asked.

“Because I’m not interested this time.”

“What about alumni week and the Welters tournament?” Margo asked.

“Not really important in the long run, but feel free to use the tournament to test your skills. But stay focused on the long-term goal,” Eliot advised.

“And the other thing?” Margo asked.

“We can’t tell the firsties, Bambi. The dick is a capable teacher, they need the skills they can get from him if we want to survive.”

“You talking about the Russian professor you mentioned before?” Julia asked.

“Yes. But that’s not till November. Next thing for you guys is getting your discipline. They start testing you next week. By October 1st you’ll be out of the first-year dorms and into your discipline’s house.”

“What are our disciplines?” Alice asked with curiosity.

“Phosphoromancy for Alice. Kady, I think it was Battle magic, I’m not sure, I know she is a physical kid. Penny is a Traveler.”

“What is a traveler?” Kady asked.

“Someone with the ability to go from one place to another instantaneously. Their magic is part of the DNA and are considered hybrid creatures,” Alice explained.

“How do you know?” Penny asked.

“My parents have a friend that’s a Traveler.”

“What about him,” Kady asked, pointing to Quentin.

“Mending. He fixes things. He’s also good at motivating people, drawing them in, making them care,” Eliot said. He got a lot of funny looks at that, and he looked down sheepishly. Quentin just smiled at him fondly.

“What do we tell Sunderland?” Kady asked.

“The facts. What you saw, what you did when the beast attacked. She doesn’t need to know about the timeline shit, but you can tell her the rest.”

“What is she going to say about you two skipping your own classes? Surely that will raise her suspicion?” Alice said.

“We had a pass from the dean.”

“And what about that summoning spell?” Kady asked.

“Tell her you were doing it with Fogg’s permission. Or tell her you didn’t know what it would do. I wouldn’t try to hide it, she’s too good to fall for that. I’ll talk to Fogg, make sure he has it handled.”

“Do you already have books on meditation and battle magic?” Alice asks.

“We do. We meet everyday by the Physical Cottage to train and practice. You should join us.”

“What time?” 

“Four O’ clock.”

“Which is the physical cottage?”

“The house that held the “Welcome Brakebills” bash the first weekend.”

“Oh, the little white one by the south end of campus?”

“That’s us.”

“We’ll be there.” Alice said. Penny and Kady nodded their agreement before getting up from their seats and heading elsewhere. Alice also made a hasty retreat.

“And then there were four,” Julia said, making the rest of them all chuckle.

“We really need them?” Margo asked.

“We do. I know they are a bunch of dicks, but Alice is one of the best magicians I ever saw, Kady is already trained in battle magic, and Penny can get us from here to Fillory and back again. He’ll be the beast’s first target. Despite how much he pisses me off, I won’t let him be slaughtered either.”

“No, I don’t suppose you can. Bad karma.”

“And we owe him. Penny 40 died and we couldn’t help. So we help him now.”

“We can’t leave them out regardless. That’s not the kind of people we are,” Quentin said.

“We know, Q. We’re just joking.”

“Okay, that’s enough crap for one day. Let’s put all this future-slash-timeline magic talk aside. We need to just relax, and enjoy ourselves for a while.”

“Julia’s right. We survived the first attack and we need to celebrate that! Oh, Eliot, let’s plan a party for tonight!”

“Tonight, isn’t that a little short notice?”

“You not up for the challenge?”

“Of course, I am, Bambi. But it would be a subpar party at best. Let’s make it for tomorrow evening, instead. Better party.”

“You gonna make me wait?”

“We can have private drinks between the four of us tonight.”

“Boring,” Margo said.

“I know. But we can plan a proper party for tomorrow’s class-free day.”

“Ohhh! That’s better. Okay, let's do that.”

TBC….

* * *

A/N: I actually had to write an outline. :shudders: I know some writers are going WTF? How can you write without one? The rest of you understand my pain. I don’t use outlines, ever. So appreciate the lengths I go to finish this story.


End file.
